Ques: What are the reason why two perfect individual are never two perfect couples. with the 7 decision making process solve the problem. The 7 decision making processes are: 1. Define the problem
2. Identify limiting factors
3. Develop potential alternatives
4. Analyze the alternatives
5. Select the best alternatives
6. Implement the decision
7. Establish a control and evaluation system

Introduction
A perfect marriage may be an illusion although the people involve may be perfect individual in their own right. This situation may arise because the two may be considered as two different captains who have now come together to pilot a ship. Each comes on board with their own ideology and conceptions; as such differences are likely to occur. With this in mind it is important to note that problems are bound to occur in marriages.

Case scenario
Take for instance the case of a couple who have been married for 7years and filled with problems. The man is a very renowned minister of the gospel and the woman Medical Doctor. In the eyes of the public everyone see them as the wonderful couple but deep within themselves they realize that all was not well with their marriage.

In the beginning, the couple were able to get along with each person trying to complement the effort of the other to make the marriage work. They enjoyed one another’s company because they were both meeting each other’s expectation. The couple also spent a lot of time together during the early part of the marriage. They were an inseparable pair and the love for each other blossomed. Things started deteriorating when the second child came, at that time; the man’s ministry had gain momentum and was a well sought after preacher both locally and abroad. As a result the man was not giving enough attention to the wife and kids. The wife too had started her own clinic and was paying more attention to building the new establishment. Both partners did not have time for each other and their children were left in the care of a house help. Although the wife was busy, she found time for the children and so expected the man to find time for the family as well.

Even when he was available, his time was dedicated to preparing for the next programme. He gave little time to the family. To worse matters, the man verbally abuse the wife any time she tries to solicit his assistance in helping with the care of the children. As a result of the hostile behavior the wife was not able to express her unhappiness and bitterness about the husband’s actions. This affected the woman physically and emotionally to an extent that her professional life was also being affected.

Decision making process
Though worried by the husband’s actions, the woman is looking for ways to revive the love and affection that existed in the marriage when it started. How can she resolve this issue? The decision making process may serve as a useful tool in tackling this problem

Define the problem
The decision making process begins with defining the problem. To be able to define the problem effectively, one has to consider the history of the problem, the causes, the effect and the indicators of the problem. In the case scenario described above, it can be said that the commitment to the marriage has weaned and there seem to be no connection between the couple. Each person is trying to focus on his/her individual aspirations. The effect is that one partner is greatly affected psychologically and emotionally. The indicators are that the union is threatened and the children are the ones who will suffer greatly. It is important each party acknowledge and agree that there is a problem they are faced with and they are prepared to work towards it resolution.

Identify limiting factors
The second process demands that the limiting factors in solving the problem are identified. In this way you will be in a position to find means of tackling the situation. The major limiting factors in the scenario above are: a. The personal interest of the couple. Each person seeking advancement in his/her profession b. The willingness on the part of both parties to accept that there is a problem c.
If the parties do not consent to arriving at a solution no head way will be made in resolving the issue.

Develop potential alternatives
The next step requires that the woman considers the potential alternatives available to her in resolving the problem. Options available may be varied. They may include:

1. Courage to bring to the notice of the husband her feelings

2. Discuss the problem with a friend of the husband

3. Bring the problem to the notice of the senior minister of the gospel whom the husband respects so much.

4. Make the parents of the husband aware of the situation

5. Seek the help of a professional counselor

Analyze the alternatives
A good analysis of the alternatives or option available has a corresponding result in arriving at a solution. The aim is to find answers to the problem. The problem at hand for example involves two different individual. To select the best way to resolve the issue, it is important the wife acknowledges the nature of the husband. How well will he respond it a third party is brought in to help resolve the problem? For instance, if the man has develop an attitude of ignoring in woman in the house, approaching him to talk about the issue will not be the best solution. However if he is the type that show regardless of his arrogant nature shows respect to the elderly then consulting a senior minister in resolving the problem will be the best option.

Select the best alternative
The analysis of alternatives informs the next step of selecting the best alternative. The alternative selected should be one that can be implemented. The guiding principle is that it is an alternative that you believe you can take an action on. Also, it should be an alternative that is workable and lastly the parties are prepared to commit themselves to this alternative. The wife in my opinion should bring the issue to the notice of a senior minister of the gospel whom the man respects. This alternative might be helpful because the senior minister might be someone whom the husband look up to and is very likely the husband will listen to the counsel of the senior minister.

Implement the decision
When a decision is reached, it is important to map out a strategy to ensure effective resolution of the problem. The wife in this case should be clever in presenting the matter before the senior minister. Again the timing in which she consults the minister is very crucial. If she informs the senior minister during the time the man is away, it will affect the way the senior minister would approach the problem. In implementation, it should be realized that it take time for people to adjust to a new way of doing things.

Establish a control and evaluation system
The best way to achieve a resolution is to establish target that can be reached to achieve the decision arrived at. The target serves as a standard by which control can be enforced. If there are standard, they can be evaluated. In our example the wife can decided that on a particular senior minister visit she will find a good way to draw his attention to the problem and schedule a time to go and see him.

Conclusion

Marriage like any other institution is not without problems. However if the decision making process outline above are used effectively, it will go a long way to resolve problems.