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一、传统中国家庭的起源说 中国历史上,三代(夏、商、周)以前的时代,可统称为远古时代,距今有四千年以上。虽无文字记载,但学者从生活中的传说和神话中推论,古人的婚姻家庭型态有两个最基本的特点:一是「具有血缘的人过着群婚的家庭生活」,另一是「孩子只知道母亲而不知父亲」的状况。 汉代学者郑玄说「天地初分之后,遂皇(燧人氏,古代传说中人类最初的首领)之时,则有夫妇。」此外,许多古书中也都有「伏羲氏制嫁娶,以俪皮(鹿皮)为礼。」的说法。在周代的《诗经》里有出现「昏姻」二字,昏姻指的就是嫁娶。此外,婚姻二字还分别代表夫与妻,或者指姻亲的双方。「家庭」一词则到南北朝时期才出现,不过「家」这个字却与昏、因(婚、姻的本字)一样,在殷墟出土的甲骨文里就能见到。

二、西方基督教的家庭起源说
西方文化深受基督教思想之影响,而当今的婚姻与家庭方面的理论有许多乃引自欧美学者之论述,因此,在探讨家庭起源时若能对圣经的基本信念有所认识,则更有助于了解西方的家庭。
(一)夫妻本为一体 根据圣经的记载,上帝在造天地之后,开始创造各种生物,最后,祂按着自己的形象造人,使人类负责管理世界万物。上帝用地上的尘土造人,吹一口气在他的鼻孔里,他就成了「有灵的活人」,即人类的始祖亚当。后来上帝觉得人独居不好,就造一个配偶帮助他。上帝于是使亚当沈睡,取下他的一根肋骨,造一个女人,亚当一见就说:「这是我骨中的骨,肉中的肉,可以称他为女人,因为他是从男人身上取出来的。」因此人要离开父母,与妻子连合,二人成为一体。
(二)婚姻与家庭是上帝美好的计划
在基督教的观点里,神创造人类原有美好的计划,人类有男有女,即成婚姻,有婚姻即能生养众多,以治理这个世界。因此神让人类有婚姻和家庭,除了成就祂的目的外,也满足人各方面的需要。但是「人不从天愿」,亚当和女人在伊甸园生活了一段时间,后来女人被园中的蛇诱惑,明知上帝禁止,却仍摘了善恶树上的果子来吃,上帝生气了,对女人说:「我必多多加增妳怀胎的苦楚,妳生产儿女必多受苦楚,妳必恋慕妳的丈夫,妳丈夫必管辖妳。」又对亚当说:「你必终身劳苦,才能从地里得吃的,你必汗流满面才得餬口,直到你归了土,因为你是从土而出的。你本是尘土,仍要归于尘土。」从此人就被赶出伊甸园。
(三)上帝是一家之主
在基督教的教义里,强调人与神的关系应该放在家人关系之前,要先顺服上帝,才是幸福家庭的根本,至今许多基督徒家庭里都会挂有「耶和华是我家之主」的牌饰,藉以提醒全家人要尊主为大,让上帝当一家之主。
(四)夫妻关系应先于其它家人关系
神造人先造婚姻,而后有家庭,因此,婚姻关系比父母、子女、他人的关系更重要。人类学家称西方家庭的主轴为「夫妻伦」,根源即在此。有趣的是,亚当以「骨」和「肉」来形容上帝为他造的配偶,中文里「骨肉」的意思却是子女,因此中国的家庭主轴称为「父子伦」。
(五)男女互为伴侣,直到一方死亡
在上帝眼中,夫妻是一体的,上帝要婚姻是永久的,直到其中一人死亡。夫妻最重要的角色是「作伴」,互相照顾,彼此享受。耶稣说:「神所配合的,人不可分开。」因此若婚姻出了问题,要设法解决,否则即是与神毁约。相对于非基督教的婚姻观,女人的角色可能最重要的就是传宗接代,其地位会因有没有生「儿子」而决定,甚至在男尊女卑的社会里,女人会因「无后」而公然被休。
(六)男女平等,同是上帝所珍爱
由圣经的观点看出「女人原是由男人而出,男人也是由女人而出,但万有都是出乎神。」男女同为上帝所造、所爱的孩子,因此在上帝的眼中地位平等,然而在人类社会的舞台上,角色因性别特征而有区隔,因此丈夫当爱妻子,如同爱自己的身子。爱妻子,就是爱自己。男人要当「头」,最主要的本分是「爱」,爱妻子,而妻子的本分是顺服丈夫,如此家庭伦理就有了顺序而不至于乱。
上述几个重点提醒我们,同样是谈家庭,东西方有相当的差异存在,尤其是家庭的起源影响到我们对「家庭为何存在」的看法。西方的基督教思想乃是从「上帝创造人,设立家庭」为主轴,拉出夫妻、亲子、家人关系、以至社会关系。而非基督教的想法,乃是以「代代相传,维系家庭」为主轴,拉出远近亲疏的人际关系,而形成一套伦理规范。

英文的family由拉丁字转化而来,原义是一个社团,包含父母、子女、仆人、奴隶等。家庭这个名词(family)的原始意义不是亲属或共同祖先,而是建立在权力与财产上的主奴关系。famel原意即奴隶,familia即对人的所有权。包括生物上有关系的(子孙)或雇来服役的,或买来的及战争中掳来的奴隶。希腊文与family 相当的字是oikonomia,主要义为家务管理(household management),其前缀oikos(eco)义为居住之所(a house or place to live in),由eco而衍生 economy(经济、节用、组织)、ecology(生态)等字。

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