WRITING ASSIGNMENT
Topic: Has social diversity generally increased as the result of economic globalization? To what extent do you agree that diversity has generally increased? Support your claims with appropriate grounds and warrants.
Economic globalization can be / is defined as a process which economic systems between countries are being connected and similar with the development of multinational companies and mass communication. To some extent, this process can have / exert effects on myriad differences in the community which can be called social diversity. Social diversity is also the way that people within a single culture are set apart from each other: social standing, ethnicity, lifestyle, religion, language, etc. There have been many debates about the divergence and convergence of society. From my perspective / In my opinion, I partly agree that social diversity mostly increased results from economic globalization.
An increasing number of market economy needs has resulted in multinational coalitions and multistate organizations for cooperation and mutual development such as The United Nation, European Union and ASEAN, which is a sample for people living together in harmony. In the way seeking a help for the nation’s development, the government decides to create these organizations for political, social, educational, and especially economic benefits. Consequently, There will be general rules for each coalition to respect all members’ sovereignty. It is said in The Sharing of Sovereignty that even the powerful nation like US has completely relinquished some of its own sovereignty agreeing to abide by the rules of World Trade Organization (WTO). However, the Convention on Culture Diversity (20, October 2005) asserts the principle of sovereignty that states of United Nations have the sovereign right not only to protect but also to promote the social diversity within their territory. Moreover, Raghavan (2001) from The Third World Network argues that WTO mostly contributes to the concentration of wealth which in fact increasing poverty for the major of the world’s people. Eventually, an organization should have protected the world’s diversity, but actually it does the opposite.
The discrimination against girls and women, a signature of feudal society in some countries, is positively decreased, thanks to the development of global economic. The gap between man and woman has been a debatable issue for decades ; however, authorities worldwide make an increasing number of investments on femininity’s life. According to The World Bank (13, April 2016), The President of World Bank Group – Jim Yong Kim announced that $2.5 billion would be invested in education projects directly benefiting adolescent girls as a possible way to embrace the female workforce in the future. Another report from The World Bank (16, December 2015) shows that the center goal of ending extreme poverty and boosting share prosperity in a sustainable manner to the World Bank’s Group is gender equality. By investing on World Bank as a demand for economic growth of each country, the opportunity for female all over the world to have a better “living standard” is becoming actualized.
Accompany with the changes of economic globally, society now absorb English as a global language which are used widely for economic reasons. Students of developing countries tend to learn English to find a job in multinational companies with higher salary and better working environment. It is implied by Heller M. (November, 2003) that languages are being increasingly treated as economic commodities, and it seems that English displaces people’s traditional ideologies because language is a primarily symbol of ethnic and national identity. By learning English in that way, learners can be divided two types: English communication learner and academic English learner. The first type may become a dealer or a merchant using English to ask and answer their costumer, while the second type may be an engineer, an accountant or a doctor using English to work for their major job. However, they both choose to learn English for their career which is related to economic needs.
In conclusion, social diversity is promoted by the development of economic globalization. Multinational companies now accelerate people to choose English as the most helpful language for future jobs, which makes English become a global language. Obviously, not only multinational companies but also coalitions like WTO and World Bank are contributed to the increasing of social diversity in which people live both sadder and poorer as well as richer and happier.
Word count: 705

Comments from Chi:
I think it is quite difficult for you to develop your ideas to support your arguments. Overall, I can catch your ideas in each paragraph; however, I can’t find the topic sentence of the 2nd paragraph as well as you counter-argument. Moreover, the topic is about “social diversity”, so you should make a connection between topic sentences and the thesis statement.
Your strong point is that you can use a wide range of academic words and provide your writing with many examples. Keep trying your best.