The assessment I took is based on the theory of the Big Five. The Big Five tells us what our personality traits are; Extraversion, Orderliness, Emotional Stability, Accommodation, and Inquisitiveness. Based on my results, I have an overly kind nature. I am trusting and helpful, all at the expense of my own individual development. My emotional stability is moderately low; I am an anxious, worrying person. I am moderately intellectual, curious and imaginative. I am moderately organized, and well-structured while still being flexible and fun. I am drawn between being assertive, and solitary. Two years and two days ago, I displayed my assertiveness. I sat down at a lunch table with two friends of mine, along with us a girl sat down. Her name was Maddie, she was beautiful and stunning to me. My two friends were hassling me, telling me I wasn’t good with talking to girls. Because of that, I had a sudden urge to ask for her number. I moved closer to her and tapped the table to get her attention. With every last ounce of balls I had, I looked at her and blurted “You are a beautiful girl, can I have your number?” Unfortunately she had a boyfriend at the time—a terrible boyfriend I should add—but we became friends. After a few months, I stole her heart as she stole mine. Now we are two years into a perfect relationship, best outcome of any situation I could ask for in my life. I discovered my anxious and worrying self around September of 2014. Maddie and I went to her friend’s house. At this time, I had no job, no license, and no direction in life. I was just living for the moment, going wherever the wind took me. I found myself sitting next to Maddie and her friend, talking about life. I had discussed all my flaws, which threw me into overdrive mode. It hit me. I was going nowhere, I wasn’t thinking about my future and what I should be doing with myself. I became nervous, scared, and anxious. I started worrying constantly. Because of the worrying, and the constant anxiety, priorities needed to be created, and important things needed to be taken care of. These terrifying emotions drove me to become a better person, and improve myself. I started with obtaining my license, I was always scared of driving, but I knew, without a license, I wouldn’t be able to do a lot in life. My main point being, Anxiety is a problem for me, but I use this as a tool to create a better life for myself. The outcome of that day in September, was me on a better path in life. I fall under a humanistic theory. Humanistic theory suggests that our “personality grows out of the resolution of unconscious conflicts… we are positively motivated and progress toward higher levels of functioning.” (Morris, 364) When I sat down at that lunch table with my friends, they told me I was a wimp. Instead of letting their comments stop me, I endured the humanistic theory; I showed them up. However, what astounds me is, one of my core motivators is my anxiety.
I considerably strive to better myself at every turn in life. When things get bad, and I undergo a conscious or unconscious conflict; I look for a way to resolve it. As I mentioned above, when I had a realization of where I stood in life, I looked for a way to change that, a way to progress out of my current life situation. Now, I use anxiety as a utensil to change whatever doesn’t feel right.