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Reflection Log 1

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Submitted By ericaor04
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Is it difficult to find happiness? In the past, I would say yes! But now, no!

I was always the top 5 in class when I was a primary student. I involuntarily set high expectation on myself. I expected to get 100 marks for each dictation. But finally I always got disappointed because I made some stupid mistakes like forgetting to add the “s”. Even though I got 99, I didn’t feel excited at all. I was the second in form in accounting in Form 5. But I was not satisfied because what I expected was the first in form. I felt like “How come I am the second one!” The situation worsens in university. I expect higher because I got a good result in HKALE. Even if I get a score which I am satisfied in some weak subjects, I don’t feel glad when I know my score is the lowest among my peers. I used to be the most outstanding one but now I am the worst. It is totally like falling from the paradise to the hell.

After the first lesson, the realization hits me. Happiness = Reality/ Expectation. That’s totally true! In my formula, my expectation is so high that happiness hardly finds me. 99 marks in dictation is actually a very good result. Why should I stay stubborn and focus on the 1 mark lost? Why should I magnify the negative side? I exactly fall into the trap of negativity bias that is focusing on negative thing like the 1 mark lost, the name of “first in form” lost. Also, I shouldn’t compare everything with others. Even if I got the lowest score among my friends, I did try my best in my weak subject. If I stupidly compare everything with others, I will feel unhappy forever. There is always someone smarter, richer, and more outstanding than me. I should lower my expectation. Be realistic. Don’t force myself too much. I believe in this way happiness is around the corner!

After lesson, I am also inspired to think why people are always moaning. It is because of the hedonic treadmill. Just like recently, with the double size of the students’ admission, queuing is a big issue. Many people complain the frequency of MTR trains and buses are too low. But imagine, in old days, students went to school on foot. Why can’t we appreciate the convenience brought by the public transport? Probably, they get used to the benefit from public transport. Once they take the convenience for granted, they demand more such as higher frequency.

Realistic, lower expectation and no social comparison! That’s what I am going to do! Stay happy, so easy!

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