Good Bye and Good Riddance Pt 4
2nd Corinthians 2:5-11
Here we are the third Sunday in the New Year. We have closed out 2012 and here we stand in 2013. The start of a New Year is the perfect time for believers that desire to obtain the fullness of God in their lives, to reflect over their lives and see what things they need to say goodbye and good riddance to.
Most often we notice the obvious, but through this message, were going to uncover was has hurt so many for so long. * On Dec 28th, in Time Square, Good Riddance Day was observed.… * This day was created, because even the world understands that we need to say “good riddance” to the pain and hurt of the past. * To do that we’re going to have to find the strength to say goodbye to anger, say good riddance to bitterness, and free ourselves of the malice toward those who have hurt us deeply. * Simply saying, we must learn to forgive. * Until we do that we can never go forward. * As long as we live in the past, we will be chained to the past, and the people who have hurt us deeply win a double victory! Once when they hurt us the first time and twice when we refuse to let go.
Hurt doesn’t just happen in man/woman relationships…Hurt can happen in the church, on the job, between friends and family, hurt can happen in all areas of life.
Most people stay in a place of confusion and stagnation, because they don’t know “How to Handle Anger and Bitterness.”
We all struggle with broken relationships, people who hurt us, painful words, deceitful actions, friends who turn against us, and unkind words said about us or our loved ones.
The following two things are true about the human condition:
We always need forgiveness and we always have someone we need to forgive. * It is at this point that 2nd Corinthians 2: 5-11 becomes so relevant. In this paragraph Paul challenges the Christians at Corinth to reach out and forgive a man in the congregation who had sinned.
Historically, Bible commentators have connected this passage with the man Paul mentioned in 1 Corinthians 5 who was sleeping with his father’s wife (evidently meaning his step-mother). * Paul instructed them to come together as a congregation and put that man out…they did this, and when the man repented, they refused him back.
This prompts me to ask a question. Which is harder? To judge sin or to forgive sin?
Both are equally hard. Both require courage, wisdom and love. And we can’t do it without the Holy Spirit on our side.

(1st Point) Forgiveness Displays God’s Mercy (v. 5-6)
The passage begins by stating the adequacy of the church’s previous discipline (vv. 5-6). * What they had already done was enough. * They put the offending man out the church. * But what’s next? * How do you know when enough is enough?
This is something that we all struggle with, down to parents disciplining their children. * Should the child be grounded? * Sent to his room? * Spanked? * Should he be required to write a letter of apology? * How long should he be punished?
Proverbs 27:6 reminds us that “Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy". * When we discipline those we love, we may be perceived as an enemy and not as a friend, sort of like parents who say, “This hurts me more than it hurts you”.
How do you know when the punishment is sufficient? * Sometimes we mistakenly think that if we forgive, we are going soft on sin. * But if God treated us the way we treat others, we would never be forgiven.
By forgiving others, we are given forgiveness. * It does not matter that the other person may never accept my forgiveness, what does matter is that by my giving forgiveness, forgiveness returns to me and blesses me by its presence. * Many times we refuse, preferring to hold on to our grievances. * Holding onto grievances is often a comfortable activity in which to engage. * Grievances support the negative perspective by supporting our victim mentality. * By being a victim, I somehow seem to be free from the demands of a free person. * A free person must act freely, openly, compassionately, lovingly. * A victimized person claims the right to be angry.
You need to say to yourself I’ve spent too much of my time in anger, frustration and denial.
(2nd Point) Forgiveness Restores the Sinner (7-8)
So many times we are like the older brother in the story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32). * Deep down on the inside, the sins of others disgust us to the point that we really don’t want them to repent. * Forgiveness seems too cheap, too quick, to easy. * After all, we’re the ones who played by the rules. * We didn’t ask for our inheritance early, we didn’t waste it all in the “far country,” and we certainly didn’t end up eating with the pigs. * We’re not the ones who got into a bad relationship. * Our kids never got hooked on drugs. * We’ve built our life around the church. * We are good, Bible-believing Christians who go to church, have a Quiet Time, give a tithe, go on mission trips, and we pray every day. * We’re not like those “other people.” * The fact is, we’re all in favor of forgiveness on a theoretical basis. * But when it comes to someone we knew and thought we could trust * Someone who let us down or hurt us deeply * We’re not very quick to forgive. * Truth be told, we think we’re better than that guy in the Corinthian Church or even the Prodigal Son, who made all those stupid decisions.
After all this person has done to me, why should I care about their restoration? We must understand the grace of God.
When we see someone being punished for their sin, we are to remember that we too are great sinners. We should remind of this: * In a thousand ways I am that man. * I have murdered in my heart a host of men and women. * I have stolen their names and reputations in the things that I have thought and said about them. * And what I have done against men and women, I have done still more and still worse against God. * And, if I never actually committed murder or theft, I know my heart well enough to know that it has to do with God and known of the virtue in me. * With a different upbringing, with a different set of temptations, what would I have done and what would I not have done?”
If there is no hope of forgiveness for the worst of sinners, then there is no hope for any of us. True forgiveness restores the sinner. Look how Paul puts it in verses 7-8:
Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.
Notice an important fact. * He doesn’t name the person involved nor does he specify the sin. * That’s a crucial point. * Paul veils his comments so as not to pile on more public shame. * The Corinthians knew exactly who Paul was talking about and that was all that mattered. * Our discipline and our forgiveness ought to be tempered by a desire not to smear someone’s reputation unnecessarily. * In this age of instant communication via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Google and all other public forums, it would behoove us to follow Paul’s example. * Love doesn’t smear someone’s name. * Love doesn’t humiliate others. * Love covers a multitude of sins.
(3rd Point) Forgiveness Demonstrates Obedience v. 10
Look how Paul puts it in verse 10. “The reason I wrote you was to see if you would stand the test and be obedient in everything."
Again, this has two sides.
Will you be obedient in exercising discipline?
Will you be obedient in offering forgiveness? * In this case forgiveness proves the genuineness of our Christian faith. * Do you love enough to forgive when discipline has led to repentance? * This can be very hard to do, especially if the person involved hurt us or the person we love deeply. * But there must come a point when we let go of the pain and anguish and reach out with the love of God to say, “You are forgiven in Jesus’ name.” * There different things that will arise, to put us to a test. Sometimes it’s sudden and sometimes it’s something that transpires over a period of time. * These ordeals put the leadership and the laity of the church to the test. * This man in the text repented of his sin. And his sin did not just affect him, but his household as well. * What should his wife do? * In the natural, she had every reason to get a divorce. * His sin was deliberate and repeated. * Many wives would say, “I cannot trust this man any longer.” * But I recall her words, spoken softly but with deep conviction. * “If Christ has forgiven me for my many sins, how can I not forgive him?” * And that’s exactly what she did. * I do not know what it cost her to say that, but it could not have been easy. * Her decision to forgive saved their marriage when it might easily have ended, was out of simple obedience to the voice of God.
Marriage may not be your issue; messed up relationship may not be your issue, but what is hindering you from being obedient to God?
Is it a person….a place…..or a thing….Maybe it’s your own flesh….
Paul says, Be ye not conformed to this world, but transformed by the renewing or your mind. We cannot walk in obedience to God, until our minds have been renewed.
(4th Point) Forgiveness Reflects the Character of Christ (v.10)
Five times in verse 10 Paul uses the words “forgive” or “forgiven.”

If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven-if there was anything to forgive-I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake. * He’s saying, “We’re all in this together-you, me, and the man who sinned.” * All of us stand in desperate need of the grace of God. * The key to forgiveness is the middle syllable-forgiveness.
Forgiveness is a gift we give to those who do not deserve it. 1. We do not forgive because of anything the person has done 2. Not because their repentance has “earned” forgiveness. a. When you have been deeply hurt, no amount of repentance, no matter how genuine it may be, can “earn” forgiveness. 3. You still must give it anyway.
We will never live this way until we grasp the final phrase of verse 11, "I have forgiven in the sight of Christ."
We forgive because we have been forgiven.
We release others because Christ has released us from our sins.
Love covers their sins because Christ’s love covered our sins.
Forgiveness always flows this way: From Christ to us to others. We do for others what God has done for us. * We have been forgiven; we know what it is like. * Now do the same for others. * We are not left to wonder what it means to forgive those who have hurt us.
You cannot understand God’s love unless you go to the cross.
You cannot understand the cross unless you see God’s love. * Man’s murder became God’s sacrifice. * A wicked crime paid an impossible debt. * Through the death of an innocent man, we the guilty go free. * If we had been there, the stench of death would have overwhelmed us, but the cross smelled good to the Father. * The work of salvation was finally done.
If you want to know what love is like, go to Golgotha and fix your eyes on the man hanging from the center cross.
Then go and do for others what God has done for you.
Now that we are in a New Year, when you believe someone has “done you wrong”, * Don’t judge that person, nor condemn them. * Don’t base their consequence off of your desire, but rather be obedient to the Lord. If the Lord is unctioning you to reconcile and forgive, be obedient to the voice of God. * The bible say’s my sheep know my voice…1st you have to be one of HIS sheep… * The reason we need to be obedient, is because we are deceiving ourselves. James says be ye doers of the word and not hearers only, lest you…. * Forgiveness is the only way out. * Forgiveness allows us to free the world from our own condemnation. * Forgiveness frees us from the world and the people that we have condemned by our judgments against them. * As we have judged them, so we have judged ourselves. * This is the real power of forgiveness. * As we face this New Year, let’s face with a New Mindset.

* With have to say Goodbye and Good Riddance to something’s in order to walk in our newness. * It’s time to say, not my will, but your will be done Lord.

Forgiveness allows us to walk in the character of Christ….Not my will, but thy will be done father….