SOLUTION-FOCUSED PASTORAL COUNSELING FINAL PROJECT

By
Marlinda M. House Rhodes Student ID #: 25149472

Presented to Dr. Max Grayson Mills In partial fulfillment of the requirements of Introduction to Pastoral Counseling PACO 500

Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary Lynchburg, VA August 18, 2012

TABLE OF CONTENTS

ABSTRACT……………………………………………………………………………………..3
PART 1: THE COUNSELING SETTING Solution-Focused Pastoral Counseling Preference…………………………………....4
PART 2: THE COUNSELING STYLE Rational of Style and Assessments……………………………………………………….5 Overview Check and Balance………………………………………………………....6
PART 3: The Counseling Structure Strategy Phase 1 The Event…………………………………………………………………....7 Phase 2 Preferred Solutions………………………………………………………….….8 Phase 3 The Path to Change……………………………………………………….…9 Phase 4 Covenants for Success …………………………………………………………9
PART 4: Counseling Summation Supportive Approach ……………………………………………………………..10 Team Approach to Debriefing…………………………………………………………10
Example of Grief Counseling………………………………………………………………….10
Annotated References………………………………………………………………………….18
Appendix A Credentials and Statement of Belief………………………………………...21
Appendix B Ethic Guidelines ……………………………………………………………....21
Appendix C Intake and Consent Forms…………………………………………………….24
Appendix D Journal…………………………………………………………………………25
Appendix E 360° Interview and My Action Plan…………………………………………..27
Appendix F Basic Assumption Guidelines SFPC Grading Rubric ………………………...39

Abstract I’m a member of Crusaders Church in Chicago, Illinois, Apostle John Eckhardt Pastor, Senior Elder. I served on the Elder’s Board with eleven other Elders. Membership is two thousand and growing. My delineation of responsibility covers four departments, altar, deacons, prayer, and women’s ministry. I counsel with church members, incoming requests from church affiliates, and referrals from other churches outside the network. Trained in nouthetic counseling, I desired to be more knowledgeable and thorough in Christian counseling. Strategic Pastoral Counseling SPC (Benner, 2003), Solution -Focused Pastoral Counseling SFPC (Kollar, 1997), and Positive Psychology drew my attention as models of choice. The case study of “Crossroads: A Story of Forgiveness” Bruce the patriarch of the family, lost his wife and daughter, in an unfortunate accident; he withdrew himself from the role of protector and care giver to becoming absentee father. After talking to a family friend Melissa, he decided on family counseling, to help Josh and Brody, moving from attending to willing positions, verses individual counseling sessions. Bruce Murakamis was the first counselee, by default Josh, and Brody did not show up. He drowns himself in his work to conceal his pain and grief. If the Murakamis family were going to be a happy and strong again, Bruce had to lead the way. Bruce character has a blend of D/S in the “Uniquely You Profile.” His desire to finish the job, taking on complex assignments, and looking for opportunities for advancement cost him quality time with his family. Bruce need to know resting is not a crime, that he could reassign responsibilities and be sensitive to family needs would be prudent in the long run.

PART 1: THE COUNSELING SETTING
Solution-Focused Pastoral Counseling Preference The science of psychiatry is the study and treatment of the mental disorders such as affective, behavioral, cognitive and perceptive abnormalities. Psychology, an applied science that examines perception, cognition, attention, emotion, phenomenology, motivation, brain functioning, personality, behavior, and interpersonal relationships of an individual. Psychiatry and psychology have been successful in helping individuals managing and identifying problems. It is a clinical process of problem recognition. Solution Focused Pastoral Counseling SFPC emphasis is solution driven. It teaches the counselee that God has given counselee the resources needed for change. The Holy Spirit helps creates solutions to the problems, through the counselee relationship with God (Kollar, 1997, 41). Solution Focused Pastoral Counseling SFPC encourages a positive outcome and focuses on qualities, strength and abilities (Kollar, 48). Happier people tend to enjoy better health, live a longer life, have closer friendships, are more creative and productive at work and in life and achieve greater success (Seligman, 1998). The most significant relationship is with God. The counselee through the assistance of the counselor encounters a spiritual journey, by spiritually directed in prayer with the counselor seeking God and His presence (Benner, 2003, 22).
Psalm 68:19, “Draw nigh unto my soul, and redeem it: deliver me because of mine enemies.”
“Be ye also patient; establish your hearts: for the coming of the Lord draws nigh.” James 5:8 SFPC and positive psychology captured the essences of Christian counsel. Pointing and directing Christians to Christ to be anchored in Him are the attributes of God’s love for His people. My desire is to steer membership in conquering their personal life issues and living an abundant life. SFPC and positive psychology would assist in accomplishing a holistic faith of trusting in God.
PART 2: THE COUNSELING SYTLE
Rational of Style and Assumptions It is imperative that I as a counselor understand the importance of Christian counseling from the perspective of a believer and the impact that it has on the believer’s spiritual and physical life. My strengths and compassions draw from my cognitive understanding and knowledge of fundamentals doctrine and biblical teachings (Benner, 9). The counselor should be knowledgeable of issues and challenges of life, that effects behavior. Ephesians 6:11 “Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.” The listening and having empathic ear allows me to be more affective in the experience the counselee will have, as he is spiritual directed to God. The evidence of an ongoing relationship with God must be identifiable in my life, that the counselee will see God in me value and desire a relationship with Christ. Hebrews 10:24 “And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:” I must not allow my S/C personality type being reserve impede on the counselee becoming reserved in voicing the problem. The Uniquely You Profile was not only beneficial for me to understand why, what, and how I interact with others it provide me with constructive ways to identify others patterns of behavior. The issues of life are not the same for everyone. The counselor must require the skills. Develop the personal qualities and abilities to effectively minister to the counselees. Support, if required should be available in the church to assist with soul care and pastoral ministry and fellowship, for the counselee (Benner, 16-28). Spiritual growth of the counselee is the working premise of the counselor (Benner, 36). The counselor identifies supportive relationship between pastoral counseling, theory and practices of secular psychology (Benner, 32). The counselor leads the counselee to a place where the conative process involves the determination, the instinct and desire to fix the problem, by integrating and applying and incorporating secular models of counseling with pastoral counseling in the structuring of counseling sessions. The counselor should continue to develop personal skills by implementing short term and solution –focused models in the established time frames designated in the counseling sessions. The guiding assumptions remind the counselor, that God is active in the heart, mind, and spirit; for all who will of everyone to know and love him (Kollar, 62). When we accept God's action, we begin to look for clues of it. Kollar lists the guiding assumptions as follows: (Kollar, 63).
Guiding Assumptions 1. God is already active in the counselee. 2. Complete problems do no demand complex solutions. 3. Finding exceptions helps create solutions. 4. The counselee is always changing. 5. The counselee is the expert and defines goals. 6. Solutions are cocreated. 7. The counselee is not the problem: the problem is. 8. The counseling relationship is positional. 9. If it is not broke, do not fix it. (Appendix F)

Overview Check and Balance Each counselee fills out the Intake form prior to counseling (Appendix C). The form mail or picked up five days before determination of the counseling sessions. The intake forms should be returned no later than three days of mailing or pick-up. The intake form given to the counselor for review. The Consent form filled out and signed by the counselee and counselor and notarized by the church Secretary at the time the interview. The terms of the counseling sessions, length, number of sessions and starting date would be determine at the interview. This process allows all parties to come to agreement when convenient to meet, for example, Monday evening more malleable than Tuesday morning or Saturday afternoon, or the counselor is counseling Monday evening the counselee would have to be reassigned to another counselor. The goal is to eliminate the counselee not attending the sessions or the counselor having to cancel. The counselee and counselor take the first step in solution recognition. Matthew 18:19- 20 “Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.” The initial interview is a pre-session, for assembly of facts. The potential counselee then informed of all require policies, methodology and standards set forth by Church Counseling Department. The counseling sessions consists up five sessions. Each phase of the counseling session to move the counselee to reliance upon God and not the counselor. Questions are pose to get the counselee to look at the solution to the problem from a biblical perspective. The counselee is taking responsibility for his own thoughts and behavior patterns. The miracle is taking placing they see the light at the end of the tunnel. They understand through Christ Jesus they can do all things as in Philippians 4:13. It should be not a miracle can take place anytime during one of the sessions. It is critical that the counselor listens and sees that the miracle is taking place, in order to pose the miracle question and facilitate the counselee clarifying the responses (Kollar, 107).
PART 3: The Counseling Structure Strategy
The Event The event is a collation of recorded incidents, or current happenings that impact on one or more person’s life inflicts pain, anguish, despondency, trauma, grief, and despair can cause disparity in thinking and behavior patterns. Even though, fact finding and notes taken in interview Phase 1, is critical meeting in commencing the actual SFPC. If the counselee is in willing position, it provides a feeling of willingness and desire to move forward, even though it may be difficult and painful. Phase 1 questions must be articulated. Phase 1 starts off with asking the counselee why are they here. There a series of questions designed to get the counselee also engaged. The Quick-Reference Guide to: Biblical Counseling categorizes Portraits as common struggles of individuals and part 5 the Action Steps that develops an acceptable action plan (Hawkins 2009, 10).
Phase1: The Event
Session 1

1. Socializing and Joining - Questions asked of the counselee that creates and productive environment. Counselor relates to the counselee casual conversation to break the tension (Benner, 76). Encouragement movement from an attendee to willing position (Kollar, 167) 2. Describing the Problem - The counselee discusses the reasons for he needing counseling. The counselor listens intently formulating a response while the speaker is talking; mirrors back or paraphrase confirming he hears the speaker; verifies the counselee need to have feelings validated. Counselor search for clues format is listening, feeling heard, demonstrating fit, encouraging feedback looking for clues awaiting an invitation (Kollar, 1-92).

3. Break: usually 5 minutes. During the break, the counselee reflects on what discuss in the session. The counselor goes over the session notes. The notes can be set up in a grid system of four segments problems, exceptions, compliments, and suggestions (Kollar, 191). 4. After the break, the session continues counselee speaking and counselor listening. As the session closes counselor will provide feedback, suggest homework assignment due at the next session. The counselor asks the counselee to pray together, if the counselee is willing.

Note: There will be a five minute break after each scheduled session and purpose already stated. Each session ends with prayer.

Phase 2: Preferred Solution
Session 2 1. This session address life without the problem. The counselee should consider what the future look like and how life would be like without the problem. This calls for clarification, describe the goal, clarify the goal and formulate the goal, scale the goal and follow up questions. 2. The counselor must develop questions that create a hopeful depiction, seek specificity, and describe personal action, empower, and create a track (Kollar, 137-138).
Phase 3: The Path to Change
Session 3 1. These sessions start with a hypothetical question the counselee implying the problem has been resolved by a miracle and what would be different in the counselee life. The counselee encouraged to explain how this miracle could have happened (Kollar, 43). There are times the counselee will say they do not know. Rephrase the question that leads the counselee. Series of questions would follow moving the counselee away from the problem to the solution. 2. Scaling would be introduced. The counselor would explain the scale and how it operates. The scale would have the following benchmarks from 0 through 10. The benchmarks would be current position, platform (what has already been achieve- solutions, resources, successes, useful circumstances), current situation, earlier success, and desire situation (How you would like things to become) (Kollar, 196-197).

3. The exceptions represent the time when these problems were not occurring. The counselor’s responsibility to make these times more noticeable, to the counselee. The goal is to help the counselee identify what has work and what he was able to do (Kollar, 188). The counselee will be contributing to his own successful. Compliments highlight the exceptions. A compliment can be both verbal and nonverbal, example a handshake and approving the eye contact (Kollar, 199). This is moving the counselee into a positive future focus into solution base recognition.

Phase 4: Covenant for Success
Session 4

1. God’s covenant does not stop at last counseling session (Benner, 97). Psalm 46:1 “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Throughout the counseling session, the counselee directed toward Christ to established intimacy and reliance upon Him. The relationship of the counselor to the counselee never intended to be long term. The counselor is the Pastor there are still boundaries of limitations. God is focal person. The Pastor function is to lead the member unto Christ, who is the author and finisher of his faith.

2. Preparing for disengagement or closing of the session the counselee is ask to keep a journal and tasks assigned at the conclusion of counseling to promote solution focused thinking. There twenty tasks and concepts that can be given (Kollar 241-254).

PART 4: Counseling Summation
Supportive Approach Session 5 preparing to disengage the counselor may want to consider the sessions formerly held review meeting notes, goals, adjust goals, scaling and any other pertinent documents that would impact upon the counselee behavior, expectations and successful life. The final session could include identification of difficulties they may encounter in the future. There could be role play would be useful at this stage. Counselee may have questions they could be Addressed. Questions can be posed to learn how the counselee feels about ending the counseling and those concerns discussed (Benner, 97).
Team Approach to Debriefing The last session the counselee is referring to the Church for spiritual direction.
This referral could include the men or women fellowship, prayer department, pastoral ministry, teaching ministry, etc. The goal for the counselee is remaining connected and growing spiritually. There may be other needs the counselee may have, been discovered during the counseling sessions. These supplementary forms of assistance could be psychological consultation, social services, financial counseling, medical, etc. Consideration must be given if additional sessions may be required. The Pastor of the church makes the final decision (Benner, 101-103).
Example of Grief Family Counseling Interview:
Bruce Murakamis is a recent widower lost his wife and daughter is unfortunate car accident. Has two sons, Josh 19 the oldest in college away from home and Brody 15 in high school. The Murakamis’ are grieving over the loss of Cindy and Chelsea is 11. Melissa, a family friend and best friend of the Cindy are also grieving. She is like an aunt to Brody.
Justin is the teenager who causes the crash. Bruce forgives Justin. Josh accepts it because his father forgave him. Brody had trouble doing so.
The family and Melissa are grieving and not handling the deaths. It appears they are living separate lives from each other trying to hide the pain. Melissa speaks to Bruce and encourages Bruce to seek help for the family.
The Counseling Interview:
The counseling interview initially set for meeting with the family. Bruce Murakamis is the only one that came.
Solution Base Questions:
1. Pastor: I glad you were able to make it. So I see you are by yourself. Bruce: Josh my oldest could not make it. He had exams to take. He is away at college. My youngest son Brody was extremely upset to come right now, but he will. 2. Pastor: When do you think that Josh will be able to come? Do you know if he will want to support the family? Bruce: Yes, Josh is extremely supportive of the family. Weekends are better. 3. Pastor: Will weekends better for your family and does that include Brody? Bruce: Weekends are better. I can talk to Melissa to encourage Brody. She is like Brody’s aunt. She is my wife’s best friend. They were like sisters. 4. Pastor: Melissa is the one who requested for counseling for the family? Bruce: Cindy and Melissa went to school together. She is the one who talked to me to try counseling. The counselor waits for the right timing, before asks any more questions. He sees Bruce is tearing and becoming agitated. He allows Bruce to catch his breathe. 5. Pastor: Bruce do you think God knows how upset you are? Bruce: I am hurting. I miss my wife and my little girl. I love God. I know God cares. I am angry. I forgave the boy who killed my wife and daughter. I still blame him in my heart. Bruce begins to weep uncontrollably. 6. Pastor: It is ok to cry. I see your grief is painful. Do you agree? Counselor hands Bruce tissue. Lay his hand on his shoulder for reassurance. Then quietly returns back to his seat cross from Bruce and silently pray. Joining means that you communicate to that person (or family) that you do it. You do understand. (Benner 2003) Bruce: At times, I am doing okay when I am at work. When I come home, I am expecting to see Chelsea playing in the yard. When I enter into the house, I am expecting for Cindy in the kitchen cooking dinner. 7. Pastor: Bruce why do you think Melissa wanted you and boys to come counseling? Bruce: She knew Brody was struggling and becoming rebellious. He is holding so much angry, resentment and bitterness in his heart. I have not been able to help him. Josh appears to be okay. His away at college and uses any reason not to come home. He does not want to come back to the house. We need help! He sobs again. Then stops and says I need counsel for me and my boys! Bruce stands up and looks the counselor straight in the eye and says, Thank you! We will be here next weekend, if is ok with you. 8. Pastor: You welcome Bruce! I want you to memorize these scriptures. You make know them already. “Blessed are the pure in the heart, for they will see God,” Matthew 5:8 and 2 Corinthians 12:9 “And he said unto me, my grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” Bruce: Yes I am familiar with these scriptures. I will memorize them. Hawkins 2009, reference guide step 6 biblical insights that the entire process of counseling’s should be embedded in biblical framework and calling on the Lord’s power to do so. Giving of memorization as homework study guides them to spiritual direction. Psalms 119:113 “Lord orders my steps.” 9. Pastor: Bruce, before departing can we pray? Do you mind opening up! Bruce: Okay Soul care is ministering to the whole person, the body, inner being: thinking, feeling and willing. (Benner, 14) Spiritual direction for Bruce with the Pastor took place when Bruce agreed to open up in prayer. The seeking of God by Bruce for utterance then followed by the Pastor. Threefold connection established with Pastor, Bruce and God. (22-23). Psalm 23:2 “He make me lie down in green pastures: he leads me beside the still waters.” Interview Notes: The family counseling for the Murakamis did not take place as intended. It was imperative that Bruce, the family patriarch, had the opportunity initially to address the anger, pain, hurt, loneliness and the lost he felt. The appreciation and acceptance of his own suffering contributed to Bruce becoming aware of the grief, lost and emotional stress his boys were yet experiencing. It is essential that Bruce considers Brody’s dependence on Melissa will restrict the relationship between Brody and him. Brody’s rebelliousness is may be an indication of other underlying problems that existed, before the demise of Cindy and Chelsea. Josh could be using college as a way to escape from the memory of his mother and sister in their home. He may be in denial of the severity of pain of losing the life style he had before leaving to go to college. He refers to Chelsea as his adopted sister. He may have subconsciously resented Chelsea time spent with the family. Assignment Get Josh and Brody to come to Counseling Bruce calls Josh. I need you to come home and help me with Brody this weekend. I am concern about your brother. This is urgent we attend the family counseling. I know mother would want me to ask you for your help. Silence, then Josh says yes, I’ll come home Dad. Josh calls Brody. Brody tells Josh how much he misses him. Josh tells Brody Mom would want us to stand together as a family and help Dad. I think we should go to the family counseling. Mom would want us to and so would Chelsea. Josh said I never want to let Mom and Chelsea down. Then Brody says; only if you go, I’ll go. Josh says thanks Brody, would tell Dad I’ll be home Friday evening. I cannot wait to see you! Brody’s says yes I’ll tell him. Brody’s waits until Bruce gets home from work. Josh called Bruce I will be home Friday. Brody and I will go to the family counseling. Then turns heads for his room without waiting for a response. Proverbs 1:8 “My son, hear the instruction of thy father and forsake not the law of thy mother.” Bruce calls Pastor Friday morning to confirm that the Josh and Brody will be attend the counseling sessions Saturday at noon. Session 2: Pastor is going over his interview questions. He has decided to interview Josh and Brody and let Bruce to remain silent listener and make no comments nor react to what is being said, until he gets the nod from Pastor to speak. The Pastor realizes Josh must be moved to a permanent willing position. Josh tried hard to be meditator keep the peace and do whatever expected of him. Brody must come out of the attending to willing position if he wants help. The Pastor wants to move the family to phase two of counseling were they began to look at the future and God ordering their steps. He has developed future focus questions. The Pastor calls Bruce before he comes and explains only he want the boys to have a chance to speak, and he will indicate to him with he can respond. Kollar, 100 states whereas a problem-focused points back to the past, a solution-focused approach, is inherently future –oriented. It is grounded in the idea that there will be a time when the effects of the [problem] are no longer dominating. It can be useful to encourage clients explicitly to focus on the future and consider how the discoveries they are making might make a difference. (Durrant and Kowalski, 1990, 98) Pastor: I happy see you Brody and Josh. Welcome come in, and he directs them to the seats he has designated for them. Pastor is seating in the middle. Bruce seat is 15 degrees to the right of the Pastor. Brody and Josh are 45 degrees to the left, which directly across from Bruce. 1. Pastor: Brody is it okay to starts us off with prayer? Brody: Is okay if we pray the prayer Mom taught us. Pastor nodded yes. God is our Lord. Please keep the family in perfect peace. Watch over us when we cannot watch over ourselves. Be with us in everything we do, guide us and lead us in truth. Amen. Brody sighs. Brody looks up and realizes Josh and Dad was repeating the prayer that they learned together with Mom. Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” 2. Pastor: Brody how have you been managing since the death of your Mom and Chelsea? Can you tell what you have been doing? Brody: I miss my Mom and sister. Nothing will ever be the same. I do not have anybody who cares about me except Melissa, and she is not there all the time. Josh away at college and Dad work all the time. I am alone. Brody’s puts face in his hands sobs. Pastor nod his head at Bruce Bruce: I know how it feels Brody. I miss Mom and Chelsea. I do not want you to feel alone. I am sorry for not being there to help out. Brody: Dad was never there. Mom and Chelsea love to hear me play the keyboard. Dad never had time for me. He is always working and worked extra hours to so Josh could attend college. Mom and Chelsea spent time with m. The only ones who cared. Since Josh is in college, he does not come home anymore. He does not care either. Bruce: I am working extra hours to pay Josh’s college tuition and buy Brody a new keyboard and pay for lessons. I wanted to surprise Josh and Brody. I am very tired. I would sit on edge of the bed and listen to Brody play. Bruce sighed a he look toward the counselor. I was so proud of Brody. I should have told him, but I ask your mother to keep the keyboard and lesson a secret. Bruce sobs. 3. Pastor: Brody are you saying you think that Bruce does not want to spend time with you? What could your Dad do to be able to spend time together? Brody: Come hear me play at school. When he comes home, eat dinner with me and ask me about my day. I have been eating alone since you know, (long sigh and mumbled) Mom and Chelsea killed, by Justin. Pastor nods at Bruce. Bruce: Brody forgive me. I want to come to hear you play. Let me know when your concerts are. I’ll want to go. I promise I will! From now on, we will have dinner together and talk. Brody we’ll make plans to do some other things you want. Give me another chance will you! Brody nods his head okay! 4. Pastor: Josh, would like to express how have you been feeling? Josh: I missed Mom and my adopted sister. I never wanted Dad to work so hard and spend all your time working. I felt it was my fault. He had to work so hard. I miss the times when it was Mom and Dad, Brody and I. We were happy. I love you Brody and Dad. I do not like living in the house. There are too many memories. Pastor nod his head toward Bruce. Bruce: Will you forgive me Josh. I not meant for you to feel guilty because I worked so hard. I wanted to provide for your mother, you, Brody and Chelsea make things comfortable life and things you desired to have. Mom was a stay at home wife and mom. I never wanted her work, if she did not want to work. She loved to take care of her sons. It was my job to keep the family going. I believed a husband and father was to be the provider of the family. Josh, I wanted college to be enjoyable and not to worry about how the tuition was going to be paid. Josh and Brody I never told anyone this, because your mother did not want anyone to know. Mom was pregnant and lost the baby. It was a little girl. I hurt your mother. She mourned, when the doctor told her could not have another child. So we agreed to adopt. Chelsea was the child she lost. Chelsea loved Cindy. Chelsea’s love for Cindy brought Cindy so much joy. Josh Chelsea was not taking your places. Chelsea was filling an emptiness your mother had in her heart. She loved you both so much. (Please note there were embellishing on the storyline: 1. Bruce reasons for working long hours 2. Explain Cindy’s reason for wanting to adopt a girl.) Josh and Brody got from their seats and Bruce stood up embraced each other and wept together and repeated the prayer that Cindy had taught them. Pastor was silent before the Lord. Silently prayed, “blessed are the pure in the heart for they shall see God.’ Matthew 5:8 5. Pastor: I see the Murakamis’ next weekend” Murakamis’ family said simultaneously, “We all will be here!”
Benner (2003) calls this initial moment in pastoral counseling—joining” (76-7); Kollar (1997) refers to this as “Demonstrating Fit” (112-3). Identifying and understanding the concerns of the counselee demonstrates good fit, builds rapport, and encourages a willingness to change in order to experience the “relocation”. The relocation is a collaborative process, the moving away from a problematic present, into the reality of a future without a problem. Secrets can impair perception and judgment of reality and life. Doing what’s assumed to be right in the best interest of the family, but keeping secrets can later on cause divisions. In Kollar, 238 mentions “Bowenian family counseling focuses on the balance of two forces, togetherness and individuality, triangle concept, and emotional cutoffs. In the Murakamis family, the two forces were Bruce and Josh/Brody. The triangle: Josh and Brody are the insiders who problems with Bruce the triangulation. The one emotional cut-off revealed the secrets that cause Bruce behavior to be altered. Bruce’s pride caused him keep secrets prevented him not to spend quality time with the family and not to experience true happiness. When Bruce revealed to the Josh and Brody why he worked the hours he did it helped both sons to realize that their father was doing what he felt that the family needed at that time, to be financially secure. Kollar states: “In counseling, we want to walk together with the counselee as he proceeds toward solutions the journey begins in the counseling relationship” (p. 112). Bruce’s task is to carry out his promises to spend more time with Brody, eat dinner together, and go Brody’s concerts. Brody’s task will open up and communicate better with his Dad on how he feels and shares with him his concerns. Both are willing to try and come to counseling sessions. Brody moved into a willing position.
Josh is willing to return home which a step toward permanent willing position. Feeling guilty for his father working so hard explains Josh’s along thinking. He understood the reason why his parents adopted and the other counseling sessions will help to address those feelings. Josh will become aware of his feelings toward the house which once felt was home. Josh felt loss prior to the death of his mother and Chelsea. There was a need for attention. He also agreed to come to counseling.
The Murakamis’ are in a willing position the grief counseling came began. If the underlying issues had not been addressed, the family counseling would be prolonged or terminated. A combination of positive psychology and Solution Based Pastoral Counseling approach would be more effective and meet the need of each family member. The pastoral care must follow up with Murakamis after counseling.
There would be interaction with the Pastor, Elders, Deacons and lay ministers, as duties and responsibilities for each group designated. All groups may not interact at one time, but as the assistance requires. The Pastoral Ministry it the preaching, worshiping, community service etc. The Murakamis’ must participate in some aspect of the pastoral ministry. In the days to come, the church will play a vital role in Christian Friendship and Spiritual Direction.
The Murakamis will need the love of the Saints, to encourage them, to include them in church activities and encourage them in the prospering their God given strengths and natural abilities to go on in life in the pursuit of happiness. I argue that one method alone cannot be set in stone. Jesus is the chief counselor. We must allow the Holy Spirit to guide the counseling process. What should be included or excluded from in individual situations? As we learn of God daily, we also must learn to adjust and effect and affect the Christian counseling ministry.
The church is a system of people working to together for the advancement of the Kingdom of God. In pastoral ministry, we teach and preach we are helpers of one another. While He is making the vision clear we lead by example. The characteristics an attributes of God are to be displayed in every believer. The vision is to be able to minister to one another from the Apostle to car attendant. The measure of agape love can not defined or measured by the rank or position. Its’ gave freely received freely given. God admonishes us to support one another as implied in Romans 15:14. In Crusaders church, God is the head, and we are fitly join to together, not just in ministry, by living day to day. We reach out to one another when there is financial need, fellowship, victim of love one, or the need just to talk. Ephesians 4:14-16 is in scripted in the embodiment of eternal love for the brethren.
Crusaders’ ministry call is to perfect the saints for the work of the ministry, wholesome life, and happy life. It was easy to identify with positive psychology and solution based pastoral counseling it was the epitome of what the church does, without having a name for it. Hebrews 10:24-26 is directive given to the body of Christ of godly behavior and treatment toward one another. As saints adorn themselves with the Word, and walk it out in their daily lives, and the Word will manifests on the outside, to bear witness to the world. God is alive and well in us.

Annotated References
ANGER
Brammer, Lawrence, and Ginger MacDonald. 2003. The helping relationship: Process and skills. 8th ed. Boston, MA: Allyn and Bacon. This is an excellent book for counselors to help the counselees recognize and identify with their mixed emotions. Counselors helpers should have the ability to recognize and respond to their own feelings would enable them to identify feelings within the counselees. (81)
Clinton, Tim and Ron Hawkins. 2009. The quick reference guide to biblical counseling: Biblical Counseling. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books. This counseling reference guide book is a tool for pastors, staff, and professional clinicians’ license or certified and lay ministers providing material for individual or group format, effective counseling, aid in the assessments, conduct and gives success discussion sessions, provide biblical insight etc... Hawkins state that anger is mention in the Bible over five hundred times. When anger is an automated response that viewed as a primary emotion. (39-49)
Ellsworth, Phoebe C., Eddie M.W. Tong. 2006. What Does It Mean To Be Angry At Yourself? Categories, Appraisals, and the Problem of Language. Emotion 6 (November), no. 4: 572–586. doi:10.1037/1528-3542.6.4.572 A study in looking at the origin of anger and the assessment of various emotions. In two studies, we compared anger, self-anger, shame, and guilt, and found that self-anger shared some appraisals, action tendencies, and associated emotions with anger, others with shame and guilt. Self-anger was not simply anger with a different agency appraisal. (572-586)

Grief
Anderson, Herbert. 2009. Common Grief, Complex Grieving. Pastoral Psychology 59 (April 2010), 2. 127-136. http://ejournals.ebsco.com.ezproxy.liberty.edu:2048/direct.asp? ArticleID=4BC7A4F0A2767129BB60 The normally of grief is a part of human life. Grief is the normal but bewildering cluster of ordinary human emotions arising in response to significant loss, intensified and complicated by the relationship to the person or the object lost, and the person dies. (127-136)
Brammer, Lawrence, and Ginger MacDonald. 2003. The helping relationship: Process and skills. 8th ed. Boston, MA: Allyn and Bacon. This is an excellent book for the counselor to help the counselee recognize and identify with various emotions. The awareness of loss causes people to enter a grieving process. There are predictable stages of grief, which can be caused by severe loss, life transitions, such as, moving, retirement, or breaking with the past. (97)
Clinton, Tim and Ron Hawkins. 2009. The quick reference guide to biblical counseling: Biblical Counseling. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books.

This counseling reference guide book is a tool for pastors, staff, and professional clinicians’ license or certified and lay ministers providing material for individual or group format, effective counseling, aid in the assessments, conduct and gives success discussion sessions, provide biblical insight etc... Grief is a complex set of emotions. When a person has experience a loss, the emotion of grief causes suffering emotionally. (130-135)
Reevy, Gretchen M., Yvette Malamud, Ozer Yuri Ito. 2010 Encyclopedia of Emotion, 1:1. Santa Barbara, CA: Greenwood Press. Reevy, provides insight about the human of emotions that can aid counselors, in getting an understanding on the human emotions that cause behavior modifications. These modification intrusions interact in person’s daily life. Grieving is a normal process; it is an individual, unique, and highly personal experience. Depending on social context and personal experience, grief has potential for both personal deterioration and personal growth. (292)
Forgiveness
Clinton, Tim and Ron Hawkins. 2009. The quick reference guide to biblical counseling: Biblical Counseling. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books.

This counseling reference guide book is a tool for pastors, staff, and professional clinicians’ license or certified and lay ministers providing material for individual or group format, effective counseling, aid in the assessments, it conduct and provides for successful discussion sessions, provide biblical insight etc... Fear to most people is a negative. When a person is afraid of things not real, danger, and feelings out of proportion, fear becomes a problem. (117)
Eagan, Gerard. 2010. The Skillful Helper: A Problem Management and Opportunity Development Approach to Helping. Pacific Grove, CA: Brooks/Cole. Forgiveness is strength. This book helps to build human strength to endure, arise and proceed on in life of happiness. Developing into a skillful helper will enable the counselor to listen for the hints human strengths in a client life. (146) Lang, Berel. American Philosophical Quarterly, 31 (April 1994) 2.105-117. North American Philosophical Publications http://www.jstor.org/stable/20014491 Forgiveness is a link to healthy and happy life. It revives joy and hope. It is one of the keys to an abundant life. Moral philosophers have largely ignored the concept of forgiveness, certainly in the comparison to the attention that give to punishment. (105)
Depression
Clinton, Tim and Ron Hawkins. 2009. The quick reference guide to biblical counseling: Biblical Counseling. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books.

This counseling reference guide book is a tool for pastors, staff, and professional clinicians’ license or certified and lay ministers providing material for individual or group format, effective counseling, aid in the assessments, conduct and gives success discussion sessions, provide biblical insight etc... Depression is on the rise. People born after 1950 is mostly likely to have bouts with depression that those born before 1950. (73)
Nydegger, Rudy V. 2008. Understanding and Treating Depression: Ways to Find Hope and Help. Westport, CT: Praeger Publishers. Depression, can affect you, or someone you know have been affected, by it. The author Rudy Nydegger helps to plow through experiences and get understanding of what can be done. Any given year, 10 percent of the population - or about 21 million people - suffers from a depressive disorder. Most do not seek professional help although the substantial majority could find relief with treatment. (1)
Zuckerman, Marvin, 2011. Personality science: Three approaches and their applications to the causes and treatment of depression. Washington, DC, US: American Psychological Association, doi: 10.1037/12309-006 The treatment of depression and its effectiveness is yet being research and developed. There are three types of therapy within a definite time –frame of standards methods of assessments. (174-198)
Anxiety
Brammer, Lawrence, and Ginger MacDonald. 2003. The helping relationship: Process and skills. 8th ed. Boston, MA: Allyn and Bacon. Environment contributes to emotional feelings of anxiety and stress. Changing the environment helps to neutralize unpleasantness. This is an excellent book for the counselor to help the counselee recognize and identify with various emotions. When there is an atmosphere of pleasant activities and relaxation anxiety can become desensitized. (144)

Clinton, Tim and Ron Hawkins. 2009. The quick reference guide to biblical counseling: Biblical Counseling. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books. This counseling reference guide book is a tool for pastors, staff, and professional clinicians’ license or certified and lay ministers providing material for individual or group format, effective counseling, aid in the assessments, conducting and providing successful discussion sessions, and provides biblical insight etc...
Rothbaum, Barbara. 2005. Pathological Anxiety: Emotional Processing Etiology and Treatment. New York, NY: Guilford Press. This book is contrast between D. Benner, C. Kollar, T. Clinton and R. Hawkins, approaches and models solutions base approaches and M. Seligman positive psychology approach verse B. Rothbaum’s Exposure Therapy. Exposure therapy involves people repeatedly antagonizing being safe, but feared thoughts, sensations, situations and activities in order to promote emotional processing. (8)
Papagerorgiou, C. and Adrian Wells. Social phobic interception effects of bodily information on anxiety, beliefs and self-processing. 2001 Behaviour Research and therapy, 39 (1), 1-11. http://dx.doi.org.ezproxy.liberty.edu:2048/10.1016/S0005-7967(99)00146-1 Papagerorgiou and Wells provide relevant data regarding anxiety and the effects it has on the physical body, while in public or private places. Social anxiety appears to be modulated by body-state information, at surface level, many individuals with social phobia fear showing signs of anxiety, such as trembling, sweating and/or blushing

Appendix A
Credentials and Statement of Belief
Credentials of Marlinda M. House Rhodes A licensed Evangelist for the last twenty five years and Elder for fifteen years, at Crusaders Church in Chicago, Illinois, under Apostle John Eckhardt, Pastor and Overseer. I govern four ministries in the church the Altar, Deacons, Intercessory Prayer, and Women Ministry. I teach, preach, counsel and travel throughout the United States and internationally. Trained in nouthetic counseling and currently attending Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary, working toward MA in Pastoral Counseling. My previous academic achievements are AA in Accounting, BSBA in Accounting, BSA in Public Administration and MPA in Public Administration. I retired after thirty years of service City of Chicago Department of Finance, as a Financial Officer. Statement of Belief
The sixty-six canonical books of the Bible as originally written inspired of God, hence free from error. They constitute the only infallible guide in faith and practice. There is one God, the Creator and Preserver of all things, infinite in being and perfection.
He exists eternally in three Persons: the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, who is of one substance and equal in power and glory. Genesis 1:26; 11: 7
God created Adam and Eve in his own image. By disobedience, they fell from their sinless state through the temptation by Satan. This fall plunged humanity into a state of sin and spiritual death and brought upon the entire race the sentence of eternal death. From this condition, we can be saved only by the grace of God, through faith, on the basis of the work of Christ, and by the agency of the Holy Spirit. Isaiah 43: 10-13; Isaiah 44: 24; Deut. 6: 4, 6
The eternally pre-existent Son became incarnate without a human father, born of the Virgin Mary. Thus, in the Lord Jesus Christ, divine and human natures united in one Person, both natures being whole, perfect, and distinct. To effect salvation, he lived a sinless life and died on the cross as the sinner's substitute, shedding his blood for the remission of sins. On the third day, he rose from the dead in the body which lay in the tomb. He ascended to the right hand of the Father, where he performs the ministry of intercession. He shall come again. Jesus in person and visible. Christ will complete his saving work and consummate the eternal plan of God.
Isaiah 9: 6-7; Psalm 16:10; John 1:1-5; John 1:14-18 ; John 17:20-23; John 17:5; John 16:27-30; John 14:7-11; Luke 1: 26-38; Romans 8:34
The Holy Spirit is the third Person of the Triune God. He applies to man the work of Christ. The justification and adoption we given to be in right standing before God; by regeneration, sanctification, and glorification of man’s nature renewed. 2 Timothy 3: 16-17; Hebrews 4: 12; 1 Peter 1: 25; Mark 13: 31
I believe in baptism by full-immersion after receiving Jesus as Lord and Saviour. I do not believe that water baptism saves a person. Salvation is a gift by accepting Jesus.
Romans 6: 3-4; Matthew 28: 19; Ephesians 2: 8-10; John 1: 33 We are accountable to God for living a life separated from sin and characterized by the fruit of the Spirit. It is man’s responsibility to contribute by word and deed to the universal spread of the Gospel. I believe in the work of the Holy Spirit through ordinary people, and that the gifts of the Holy Spirit are relevant for today.
1 Corinthians 12, John 1: 33; Acts 1: 5-9, 2: 1-18; 1 Cor. 14: 2-4, 14-19
At the end of the age, the bodies of the dead shall be raise. The righteous shall enter into full possession of eternal bliss in the presence of God, and the wicked condemn to eternal death. Luke 23: 33-34; Luke 24: 1-7; Isaiah 53: 3-7; 1 John 5: 10-12; Romans 10:9; Acts 4:11-12; Colossians 2:6; Ephesians 3:16-19; Ephesians 5:18; 1 Timothy 2:5 I believe in a real Heaven and a real Hell. Where we spend eternity governed, by which one we choose while we're alive. There are no second chances after 'Death'.
Revelation 21: 22-27, 20: 10-15; Hebrews 9: 27-28

Appendix B
CRUSADERS CHURCH COUNSELING DEPARTMENT ETHICS CODES
Introduction and Mission
The code designed to assist Crusaders Church counselors serve the members better and to improve the work of Counseling Department in the church. I will help to achieve the primary goals of the Counseling Department to bring honor to Jesus Christ, and His church, promote excellence in Christian counseling, and bring the unity to counselors in the church.
A more comprehensive and behavior-specific ethical code needed for church counselors and mental health and ministerial areas: (1) The mounting of evidence of questionable and incompetent practices among church counselors, including increasing complaints of client-counselor harm; (2) The vitality and growing maturity of Christian counseling, including its many theories and controversies indicate the need for an overreaching ethical-legal template to guide the development of biblical and empirically sound Christian counseling models.
This Code-beyond defining the boundaries of unethical practice-affirmatively. It educates counselors in the direction to go becoming helps of ethical excellence, capable of more consistently securing the best counseling outcomes.
The mission of this Code is to: (1) To bring honor to Jesus Christ and promote excellence and unity in Christian counseling; (2) To promote the welfare and protect the dignity and fundamental rights of all families, individual, and church groups.

ETHICS STANDARDS
1. Ethical Standards for Christians Counselors
100 First, Do No Harm
101 Affirming the God-given Dignity of All Persons 102 No arm or Exploitation Allowed 103 Avoidance of Client Harm, Intended or Not 104 Managing Clients Conflicts 105 Action Regarding Clients Harmed by other Helpers 106 Managing Problems with Managed Care 107 Refusal to participate in the harmful Actions of Clients 108 Application to Deadly and Threatening Behavior 109 Application to Substance Abuse and Other Addictions 110 Application for Abortion 111 Application for Divorce 112 Application to Premarital and Extramarital Sexual Behavior 113 Application to Euthanasia and Suicide 114 Sexual Misconduct Forbidden 115 Sexual Relations with Former Clients/Patients 116 Counseling with Marital/Sexual Partners 117 Dual and Multiple Relationships 118 Rule of Dual Relationships 119 Proving an Exception to the Rule 120 Counseling with Family, Friends, and Acquaintances 121 Business and Economics Relations 122 Counseling with Fellow Church Members 123Termination to Engage in Dual Relations Prohibited

200 Competences in Christian Counseling
201 Honoring the Call to Competent Christian Counseling 202 Duties to Consult and/or Refer 203 Consultation Practices 204 Referral Practice 205 Seek Christian Help, If Available 206 Avoid Counsel against Professional Treatment 207 Duties to Study and Maintain Expertise
CRUSADERS CHURCH COUNSELING DEPARTMENT ETHICS CODES

208 Maintaining Integrity in Work, Reports, and Relationships 209 Protective Action When Personal Problems Interfere

300 Informed Consent in Christian Counseling
301 Securing Informed Consent 302 Consent for the Structure and Process of Counseling 303 Consent from Parent or Client Representative 304 Documentation of Consent 305 Consent Biblical-Spiritual Practices in Counseling 306 Special Consent for More Difficult Interventions

Note: Adopted from the American Association of Christian Counselors AACC Code Ethics The Y2204 Final Code by the AACC Law and Ethics Committee George Ohlschlager, Chairman
Appendix C
CRUSADERS CHURCH COUNSELING INTAKE FORM MARLINDA HOUSE RHODES, COUNSELOR CONFIDENTIAL MEMBER INFORMATION INSPIRING & EMPOWERING YOU TO BECOME YOUR GOD GIVEN POTENTIAL & CHRIST CENTERED. PATIENT NAME_____________________________________________________________________ PHONE # HOME (____)________________________ CELL (____)_____________________________ ADDRESS _____________________________ CITY _________________ STATE____ ZIP ________ AGE __BIRTH DATE ___-___-____MARITAL STAT M  D W SEX M  F SS#____-____-___ OCCUPATION _____________________EMPLOYER ________________________________________ WORK PHONE (___)________________ SPOUSE NAME ____________________________ CONTACT(___)_____________________________ NEAREST RELATIVE________________________________PHONE ___________________________ AGES OF YOUR CHILDREN____________________________________________________________ EMAIL ADDRESS _____________________________________________________________ HAVE YOU SEEN CHRISTIAN COUNSELOR IN THE PAST? Y  N  FOR WHAT CONDITION AND WHOM? ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ WHO FOR REFERED YOU TO OUR COUNSELING CENTER _____________________________________________________________________________PLEASE FILL OUT THE MEDICAL AND PHYSICAL PROFILE LISTED BELOW: LIST YOUR EXPERIENCES YOU HAVE ON A DAILY BASIS. HELP US IDENTIFY THESE AREAS OF STRESS IN YOUR LIFE. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT WEIGHT? _______LBS______ MEDICATIONS: 1.____________________________________________CONDITION____________________________ 2.____________________________________________CONDITION____________________________ 3.____________________________________________CONDITION____________________________ 4.____________________________________________CONDITION____________________________ 5.____________________________________________CONDITION____________________________ DO YOU SMOKE? Y  N  ___________#/DAY HOW MANY YEARS? ________________ DO YOU DRINK? Y  N ____________#/DAY/WEEK______________________________ IS THERE ANY CONCERNS YOU HAVE YOU WANT TO SHARE:_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________MEMBER ______________________________________________DATE__________________INTAKER______________________________________________DATE___________________COUNSELOR ASSIGNED_________________________________DATE___________________ |

CRUSADERS CHURCH COUNSELING DEPARTMENT CONFIDENTIALITY and CONSENT FORM

All information collected during your counseling session(s), including personal health information, kept confidential and will not be shared with anyone outside the counseling department unless required by law. Information about the counselee will have a code and will not show name or address, or any information that directly identifies the counselee. You will not be named in any reports, publications, or presentations.

If you decide to leave the Crusaders Church, the information concerning you that collected before you left the Church the counselee will receive a copy upon request. No, additional or new information can be collected, without counselee’s permission.

The information collected from the counseling session(s) kept in a locked and secure place in the Counseling Department archives for 25 years. Only the counseling team Elder Broad and Senior Pastor authorized view the counselee’s records.

Confidentiality Consent Form

Part One Non-Disclosure

I …………………………………………………… (please print) do not give consent for information related to my counsel sessions and physical health nor be passed the information. I accept that this may result in my needs not accommodate.

Signed……………………………………………..Date……………………………………

This form kept:

…………………………………………………………………………. Secretary of Counseling

And Part Two Consent to Disclosure

I ………………………………………………………….. (Please print) consent to: disclose

A) Upon My Doctor’s Request Per my Consent
□ Sessions records
□ Report produced after your Assessment of Need
□ Other relevant documents

Appendix D
JOURNAL

Week 1 #1
Reference: According to Brenner (2003)), “A prayer process in which the person seeking help is cultivating a deeper personal relationship with God meets with another for prayer and conversation that is focused on the increasing awareness of God in the midst of life experiences and facilitating surrender to God’s will.” (13).

Reflection: This definition of Spiritual Direction as an indicator to me that everything we do must be Christ centered. Pray is communicating with God and God communicating back us.
Relocation: God, open my ears to hear, open my heart to receive your ways, open my mouth to speak your ways. I am helpless and useless without your guidance and leading. Holy Spirit continues to guide me into all truth. Jesus is my paradigm. Father let your glory be upon my words that it will be pleasant to your ears. I will remember Isaiah 58:5 and seek you always for your ways and thoughts are high above mind.

Week 2 #2
Reference: According to Hawkins (2009), “You ask each client for his or her consent to prayer interventions, and every client can and should be prayed for, even if he or she does not join you and you must pray silently, or pre or post-reflection” (10). * Refection: This statement that Hawkins stated cause me to wonder, how could the client be a part of this process. * Relocation: I spent time rethinking over this statement. I wondered, how effective is silent prayer could be, when the client refuses to pray and not hearing the prayer. Then God brought these scriptures to my spirit Col.4:22b “always laboring fervently for you in prayers, that you may stand perfect complete in all the will of God.” And James 5:16b, “ the effective fervent, prayers of a righteous man avails much.” These scriptures reminded me God hears my prayers. Am encouraged.

Week 3 #3
Reference: Kollar, 2007 “Complex problems do not demand complex solutions.” (67)
Reflection: Reading the section heading shifted my thoughts to Exodus 31:3
And I have filled him with the spirit of God, in wisdom, and in understanding, and in knowledge, and in all manner of workmanship.
Reference: I was reflecting over the various problems that could occur and how would I govern a complex problem when I could not speak to the person in person or able to have an intensive conversation with them to encourage them not to give up. I am speaking of such things death, murder, rape, incest, fear of dying, etc. The person is in crises mode and seeking help now, now word, now guidance, just anything now to help the pain.
God highlighted Exodus 31:3. to me, that I am filled with the spirit of God. God would give me wisdom in what to say no matter what work is laid before me. God will give me right words to speak, until the appointed time that I would be able to have contact with the person in need or wisdom to assign counselee to another counselor or a team of counselors.
It is essential that we have team ministry. The team be able to the minister when the leader is busy up and unable to meet the need of another. Jesus sent the disciples out in twos. It is critical that the ministry of Christian counseling we have a team of counselors called, Pastoral Care. “Pastoral care refers to pastors, elders, deacons, and other members of a congregation to those who seek to serve.” (Brenner, 18)

Week 4 #4
Reference: Uniquely You Profile, 2012 “The path of every search must pass beyond yourself toward knowing God better (Philippians 3:10). This instrument simply is to provide with the help you understand your motivation, while maturing you into an effective servant of Christ.” (21)
Reflection: When I ruminate on my pass paths I question myself was I searching for truth and looking for change and desiring spiritual elevation or just going through the motions of without purpose to my destiny? Psalm 37:23 “The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighted in his way.”
Relocation: Isaiah 28:9-10 “Whom shall he teach knowledge? And whom shall he make to understand doctrine? Them that are weaned from the milk, and drawn from the breasts. For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little:” I can clearly see that when God calls to the ministry there is a time of present, and subsequent preparations for the work God has laid before me. Benner, Kollar, Hawkins, Petersen, Cloud and Wills represent the precept, line and the little.
I ‘m excited about taking the course, and I had no revelation of the course content and level of intensity. Each week focused in the viability of pastoral counseling, self- awareness and development, yet Christ centered. Growth and change is inevitable.
Week 5 #5
Reference: Cloud, “Those who succeed in life cannot ignore their hearts, minds, and souls.” Scripture reference quoted by, Dr. Cloud, “Above all else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23.” (32-33)
Reflection: God Word is all ways evolving us and changing the spiritual man, causing my inner man be manifested in my outward appearance.
Relocation: During my Christian walk, my relationship with God, body of Christ, leadership and mentorship I was focusing on not falling, not backsliding, and holding on, doing the right thing. I placed my goals in a holding pattern, subconsciously. It would be easy to place blame on those I encountered in ministry, but the fact of the matter is that I compromised because there was no conflict with others when I just go a long, make no waves, and following the lead.
Now I can see the hand of the Lord guiding me to Liberty and structuring the area of ministry, I dreamt of, desired and envisioned for so many years. I am not implying that God did not order by steps prior to enrolling at Liberty. What I am saying that my heart was not open to the wellspring of life. The wellspring of life is holistic in nature. It encompasses the totality of a person, everything God created and predestinated. I sense the wellspring overflowing. I embrace all of me. I am happy!!!

Week 6 #6
Reference: Cloud Principle 7, “Successful people do not blast people with anger. They use their anger to let the other person know that there is a problem. They go solve the problem by approaching the person in love, not anger, and facing the issues.” (178)
Reflection: Anger a fruit of the flesh. It kills and destroys. It robs the joys of life. It is characteristic of the evil one. Words of anger linger produce seeds of death and stunts and stuff out growth. It obviates everything in its path. Love and grace is the bomb of Gilead it heals and cultivates life. Words of wisdom which is easily to be in treated will save those from destruction.
2 Corinthian 8:7
“Therefore, as ye abound in everything, in faith, and utterance, and knowledge, and in all diligence, and in your love to us, see that ye abound in this grace also.”
2 Corinthians 9:8
“And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound to every good work:”
Relocation: I think how many times I spoken out of anger without reason or wisdom and the damage done to relationships and the hurt, pain, disappointment I showered on the guilt-ridden and innocent. God was not exalted. I lost my witness in a moment of anger. I took the person actions and/or words as an assault against me personally and became offended. I later on I learn and repented. The flow of words from my mouth will be not bitter and sweet. My words should be easy to entreat. God continually put a watch over my mouth.

Week7 #7
Reference: Kollar, “4. Make every Effort Refrain from Dual Relationships” of ethical procedures.” (267) “It is difficult to give attention to the responsibilities of a counseling, while at the same trying to maintain a personal relationship with a counselee.” (270)
Reflection: Wisdom is the principle thing. Ministering in wisdom and integrity prevents the human error dividing the church, wounding members and discombobulating relationships. “But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass: For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straightway forgetteth what manner of man he was.” (James 1:22-24)
Relocation: God we, I, and the church, need your help! It is difficult to write this in the first person, because dual relationships exist throughout the church in all facets of ministry. My church teaches to reach out to those who seating next to, befriend them, pray for them, fellowship with them, etc. Church relationships develop before leaders appointed to positions of authority. Where the line should be drawn, before leaders placed in ministerial authority? In a small church it extremely difficult because there are few leadership positions available to delegate, everyone knows each other. My church has 1500 hundred members (including children and youth) and 4 counselors who serve in other positions throughout the church, as well. I ask God to give me wisdom in ministry and how to handle situations when dual relationships presents itself in counseling or any other ministry in the church God has appointed me to, that my integrity would not be compromised, nor members wounded, and relationships not discombobulated. Amen!

Appendix E
3600 INTERVIEW INSTRUCTIONS
Assessments used in this course are helpful tools for understanding how you tend to think, feel, and make decisions, yet more information is needed to fully understand your actual, observable, behavior in our bumper-human world. A 3600 Interview permits you to gain insight from the perspective of those in your sphere of influence regarding how you actually interact. It will also provide means to monitor your personal and professional growth. Ask at least two people that know you to answer the following questions. Their answers do not have to be long, just concise and legible. (If more room is needed, use the back of paper.)
First Interview by Carolyn House 1) How does Marlinda Rhodes typically interact with other people? Can you think of a recent example?
I believe Marlinda interacts well with others. I feel that because she is a strong personality, others at times feel threatened by her honesty. I was in a class taught by Marlinda earlier this year. Some people feel a little insecure. She questions them, which provokes them to probes them to of deeper.

2) Have you ever been in a situation where you saw Marlinda Rhodes take on new tasks or roles? Describe this situation and what he did?
Yes, Marlinda is an Elder at the church given the task of reorganizing the Women's Ministry, as the Chief Advisor. She accepted the position. She is a perfectionist and sometimes grows impatient when some assignments do not get completed in a timely manner. She used to do things herself. Now after reassessing her approach and delegating the assignments appropriately, things are beginning to run much more smoothly. 3) What has been a particularly demanding goal for Marlinda Rhodes to achieve?
Restructuring of the Women's Ministry has been a stimulating task for Marlinda. Bridging the gap between the young adult females and the seasoned members of the Ministry is quite a challenge. I believe that Marlinda's goal to have a state of the art Women's Ministry that will address the needs of the church and women of all ages, projected completion date in 2013 4) When you observe Marlinda Rhodes, which of the following pictures come to mind?
Circle the appropriate word that best describes him her and explain why this picture came to mind. The following web site explains how these pictures describe personality patterns: http://weirdblog.wordpress.coml2007/02122/personality-types-lion-beaver-otter- and-golden-retriever/accessed April 12, 2012
LION OTTER BEAVER GOLDEN RETRIEVER
The LION, because Marlinda is a leader, she is a visionary. She is also strong willed, decisive and productive. These qualities stand out. She can also be somewhat stubborn at times.
3600 INTERVIEW INSTRUCTIONS
Assessments used in this course are helpful tools for understanding how you tend to think, feel, and make decisions, yet more information is needed to fully understand your actual, observable, behavior in our bumper-human world. A 3600 Interview permits you to gain insight from the perspective of those in your sphere of influence regarding how you actually interact. It will also provide means to monitor your personal and professional growth. Ask at least two people that know you to answer the following questions. Their answers do not have to be long, just concise and legible. (If more room is needed, use the back of paper.)
Second Interview by Elaine Armour: 1) How does Marlinda Rhodes typically interact with other people? Can you think of a recent example?
Elder Marlinda has the ability to gather people together. Everyone she comes in contact with loves to be around her. Elder Marlinda interacts with others through many facets whether it is by way of a teacher, mom, or a friend. A person feels the need to protect her and love on her. She is a phenomenal friend or associate to have.

2) Have you ever been in a situation where you saw Marlinda Rhodes take on new tasks or roles? Describe this situation and what he did?
Yes, I’ve witness Elder Marlinda take on new roles as well, as additional tasks. When the department head of the Deacons resign no one wanted the position. Elder Marlinda took over the department and recruited new deacons. Now she is grooming potential leaders for the position along with many other assignments that are forgoing in the ministry. 3) What has been a particularly demanding goal for Marlinda Rhodes to achieve? I have not witnessed anything that was demanding her not to achieve. Elder Marlinda does not allow challenges to defeat her. Faith in God is her strength, and power that allows her to achieve any goal. 4) When you observe Marlinda Rhodes, which of the following pictures come to mind?

(Circle the appropriate word that best describes him her and explain why this picture came to mind. The following web site explains how these pictures describe personality patterns: http://weirdblog.wordpress.coml2007/02122/personality-types-lion-beaver-otter- and-golden-retriever/accessed April 12, 2012
LION OTTER BEAVER GOLDEN RETRIEVER
A lion protects her young and stands as an authoritative figure over the land. She roars, when trouble arises and attacks when needed.

Appendix E
My Rational Style Action Plan
1) The overarching goal/purpose for my personal life is: My later years will be more fulfilled than my previous years visualizing clearly and spiritually the attributes and characteristics of God as a servant, minister of the Gospel, and champion of God. Christ will always abound and I will always a base. (John 3:30)

2) My three highest spiritual gifts are: Teaching, Administration/Ruling and Giving. This means I also tend to be more loyal, true blue, peaceful, calm, considerate, thoughtful diplomatic, peacemaking, generous, giving, pondering, wondering, inquisitive, questions and organized and orderly.
3) The over use of these gifts sometimes makes me too complex, expect too much and influence by the power of money.
4) My highest personality profile plotting point in Graph 1 S/D and Graph 2 S/C. I need to be more open and receive others. I should learn how to be more expressive, also be more exciting. I will demonstrate sensitivity and listen tentatively to others. I not allow situations turn me into extremist and become frustrated by challenges. I will not repeat old paradigms and fall into a rut of being overly serious. I desire to have balance life.
5) The overuse of this type makes me feel, guilty, despondent, and drained and a failure.
6) My most obvious combination personality and spiritual gift type (rationale style) is: S personality with gift of teaching and administration/ruling.
7) To communicate and relate with others more effectively: I should be more at tentative to what they are staying, then what are they saying. When the opportunity arises ask them what is their expected outcome or what they want to happen. Other person must have the opportunity talk and express their feelings, even though their feelings are not mined or I feel may feel the same.
8) My greatest blessing and /or struggle concerning my giftedness
Is to see them impact upon the lives of others were godly change, upgrade, and impartation has taken place. My struggles with my giftedness are when traditions of men does not discern the times and seasons of God. Example: Church A is writing up Sunday school lessons from Sunday school book, when the Christian book store is selling the book. This impacts time, costs, and creativity when the books could purchase.
9) I should guard or improve my following gift tendencies to be shy, mild, timid, and soft-soften, proper, formal, calculating, analytical, careful cautions, perfectionist precise, compliant, and goes by the book.
10) I should guard or improve my following personality tendencies of being to sacrificing, inspire others to help, become more interest in results than relationships and revelation, do not over extend myself, be sensitive to others and their needs, and become more assertive.
11) I will check/control my rational style, in order to demonstrate fit with a D relational style through the following strategy:
It would be necessary for me to become more assertive, self- confident and direct and speak up with clarity A D type is active/task oriented Example: I would acknowledge that D is the perfect person for the task at hand. I would assign him to independent tasks, but he will have work with others who will benefit learning his area of expertise. I would purposely stress that the project/task is a collaborative effort; everyone’s input will be require. The project could not be accomplished without input/reports from everyone. D would be responsible to see that everything ran smoothly, no complaints and report on the status of the overall project on a consistent basis. I would give D a written directive or verbal directive including who is on the team and assignments.
12) I will check/control my rational style, in order to demonstrate fit with I relational style through the following strategy I would need to be more define in time management, polite, but methodical with my approaches, set an example for promptness and time constraints, taking responsibility for supervision of projects or staff. I type is active/people oriented. Example: I would call me in my office to reiterate that this is a project that is time and quality sensitive. It must be completed on time. She, C, and S would be active members on the team. I set D as the point person over the team. Everyone will have there on assignments, but D is there to provide advice and expertise, time managed the project and report on the status of the project on a weekly basis. I would hand I a written directive or the verbal directive and who is on the team and assignments.
13) I will check/control my rational style, in order to demonstrate fit with a C relational style through the following strategy I need to be more receptive to others opinions, thoughts, give consideration and implementation to changes suggested by others. C types are active/ people oriented C scheduled a meeting with I to bring him on aboard to be part of the team, rest of the team were in attendance. I explained that I was would be the person who would compile the reports for D and to review them to evaluate if the appropriate format use, before D makes the final decision on the overall project status reports and finish the project. The changes made, D will assign off on the reports. The reports would be sent backed to the project person. D will confer to C of the recommendation C made for clarity. C represents quality control. If any format changes or data modifications must be collaborated with the entire team. I would hand C a written directive or the verbal directive and who is on the team and assignments. An update memo would be forward to team members.
14) I will check/control my rational style, in order to demonstrate fit with an S relational style through the following strategy
I would be intuitive with S, because of similar tendencies we both may share. I would be focusing on the time constraints assigned to the job tasks, project status reports and the project completion date, rather than time spent on discussing potential, creative concept theorems, with S. S type is passive tasked oriented. Example: S is the last team member assigned. The entire team is present. I would welcome S to the team share with everyone that he is excellent colleague to work with, and he is extremely supportive, will work to get the project done, that he has a passion to get the assignment done. I remind the team if one person is late with their assignment all assignments are late. The project is a collaborative effort. There is not time for lagging or daydreaming. D would be introduced to S as the point person. D would have the opportunity to address assignments and the time table with the team. A Q & A will follow next to assure the team is on the same page. At the end, of the meeting S would be given all memos previous issued and everyone would be receiving the memo of this entire meeting.
15) To grow more spiritually, I will utilize the following spiritual disciplines A. I would fast and pray (Isa. 58:5-6; Dan. 9:3), B. Read (Acts 17:11) and meditate (Jos. 1:8; Ps 119:15) on the Word (Ps. 1:2; 119:148), C. Seek (Ps. 70:4; 119:2) God for guidance (Ps. 31:3; 32:8) D. Actively obey (Acts 5:32; 1Peter 1:22) the Word, E. Apply the Word (Pro.22:17; 23:12) it daily to my walk (Pro.22:17; 23:12), F. I will confess my sin (Job 40:14; Ps.32.5), G. I will confess the Word and do the Word (Dan. 9:20; Matt. 10:32).
I will allow God to change the areas in my life that is not like Him. I will submit my will unto the Holy Spirit who is my comforter and the Spirit of Truth.
16) To avoid and resolve the conflicts more effectively, I will covenant, with God to engage the following protocol:
I will remember this covenant 2 Kings 23:2-3 “the king went up into the house of the LORD, and all the men of Judah and all the inhabitants of Jerusalem with him and the priests and the prophets and all the people, both small and great: and he read in their ears all the words of the book of the covenant which was found in the house of the LORD. And the king stood by a pillar, and made a covenant before the LORD, to walk after the LORD, and to keep his commandments and his testimonies and his statutes with all their heart and all their soul, to perform the words of this covenant that were written in this book. And all the people stood to the covenant.”
I accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior of my life, engrafted and circumcised in my heart as covenant child of God. The Comforter, the Holy Spirit, keeps and guides me into all truth. I die daily to self on the cross. I am being progressively being sanctified.
17) My prayer in discovering my relational style and demonstrating fit through my life and profession/ministry is God; I beseech thee for the leading of your Holy Spirit to guide me into every lasting truth. If there be any wick, evil and perverted way in me cleans me of all unrighteous, that I will not touch anything with unclean hands. Thy ministry and calling God, has ordained an anointed me to live, walk and do I offered it up back unto God to be sanctified and be made holy. God allow wisdom to be my portion and my words of counseling personify wise words of instruction, which are easy to entreat. Lord orders my steps and fills my mouth with your words and to do what is right in thy sight. Lord, I will obey and follow after God. Jesus increase in me and I will decrease that people do not see me, but, the Christ that lives inside of me and manifested on the outside me. Lord, I will remember that goodness and kindness for it has been sweeter than honey. I remember that correction for it delivered my soul, without God I cannot do anything. Jesus is my rock and fortress!

Appendix F
Basic Assumptions Guidelines SFPC
Kollar

1. God is already active in the counselee. 2 Corinthians 7: “ Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. Galatians 2:20” I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ lived in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” 2. Complete problems do no demand complex solutions. 1 Corinthians 1:27 “But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; ”
3. Finding exceptions helps create solutions. 2 Corinthian 8:7” therefore, as ye abound in everything, in faith, and utterance, and knowledge, and in all diligence, and in your love to us, see that ye abound in this grace also.”
4. The counselee is always changing. Acts 20:32 “and now, brethren, I commend you to God, and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up, and to give you an inheritance among all them which are sanctified.”
5. The counselee is the expert and defines goals. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengthened me.
6. Solutions are cocreated. 2 Corinthian 9:8 “And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound to every good work:”
7. The counselee is not the problem: the problem is. Ephesians 6:11
“Put on the whole amour of God that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.”
8. The counseling relationship is positional. James 2:5 “Hearken, my beloved brethren, Hath, not God chosen the poor of this world rich in faith, and heirs of the kingdom which he hath promised to them that love him?”
9. If it is not broken, do not fix it. 1 Corinthians 3:10 “According to the grace of God which is given unto me, as a wise master builder, I have laid the foundation, and another buildeth thereon. But let every man take heed how he buildeth thereupon.”

Solution-Focused Pastoral Counseling (SFPC)
Final Project Grading Rubric

The following represents an additive grading rubric. Instead of beginning with 200 and losing points for errors, you begin with a 0 and earn points for your work. In determining your grade, three questions will be asked:

QUESTION VALUES TOTAL 200 POINTS
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INTRODUCTION OF SFPC? Question Value: 10 Points

* Abstract: Did it introduce context (4), overarching goal (4), and identify care seeker (2)? Points: 5 * Table of Contents: Organized with appropriate headings & subheadings (10), References (4), each Appendix identified (12), and Grading Guideline (4)? Points: 5

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PART 1 OF SFPC: The Counseling Setting? Question Value: 60 Points

* Introduction: Overview of SFPC w/rationale (20) & assumptions (20) Points: 20 * Pre-session Package: Essential elements introduced, adequately prepared, & located in Appendix: Ethical
Guidelines; Intake Form; Informed Consent (included confidentiality covenant & explanation of note taking/record keeping, tasking, and referral process)? Points: 15 * Annotated References of 5 subjects: 3 Required - grief, anger, forgiveness; 2 student’s choice; and 10 annotated entries/2 per subject? Points: 10

* Journal: Minimum of 7 substantive entries (Wk 1-7 = 1 per week) Points: 15 -------------------------------------------------
PART 2 OF SFPC: The Counselor’s Style? Question Value: 40 Points * Identified relational language, described relational style (integrated assessments and course materials)? Points: 20 * Explained plan for controlling Relational Style utilizing course resources and placed Action Plan Worksheet in Appendix? Points: 20 -------------------------------------------------
PART 3 OF SFPC: The Counseling Strategy/Structure? Question Value: 40 Points * Phase 1: Use of assumptions, clear distinction of phase, aim, role and goal, skill set used to demonstrate fit in aligning w/counselee’s style? Points: 10

* Phase 2: Use of assumptions, clear distinction of phase, aim, role and goal, pastoral assessment, skill set used in collaborative goal description and identification of strengths and resources? Points: 10 * Phase 3: Use of assumptions, clear distinction of phase, aim, role and goal, skill set used in collaborative development of vision clarification? Points: 10 * Phase 4: Use of assumptions, clear distinction of phase, aim, role and goal, skill set used in consolidating change, and partnerships activated to support and secure change? Points: 10 -------------------------------------------------
PART 4 OF SFPC: The Counseling Summation? Question Value: 50 Points * Satisfactorily discussed the versatility of the supportive feedback technique? Points: 10 * Satisfactorily developed a procedure for reflexive praxis (10), identified/secured a Mentor/Friend (5), and developed debriefing guidelines (10)? Points: 25 * SFPC project was written according to graduate-level expectations, Formatted according to Turabian (7e) Reference Style Guidelines, utilized required resources and at least two secondary sources, with Appendix (single-spaced) and not more than 40 pages (in its entirety)? Points: 15 Grade: Comments: