Free Essay

When a Dog Barks Really Loud

In:

Submitted By Gwia
Words 1005
Pages 5
It all started when our protagonist, Doggie, woke up in a bush. It was the tenth time it had happened. Feeling overwhelmingly frustrated, Doggie attacked a butterknife, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Without warning, he realized that his beloved diary was missing! Immediately he called his best friend, Catman. Doggie had known Catman for (plus or minus) 200,000 years, the majority of which were sassy ones. Catman was unique. He was ingenious though sometimes a little... dimwitted. Doggie called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Catman picked up to a very glad Doggie. Catman calmly assured him that most beavers cringe before mating, yet otters usually indiscriminately yawn *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Doggie. Why was Catman trying to distract Doggie? Because he had snuck out from Doggie's with the diary only nine days prior. It was a exotic little diary... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Doggie got back to the subject at hand: his diary. Catman sighed. Relunctantly, Catman invited him over, assuring him they'd find the diary. Doggie grabbed his grandfather clock and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Catman realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the diary and he had to do it aimlessly. He figured that if Doggie took the truck, he had take at least eight minutes before Doggie would get there. But if he took the time machine? Then Catman would be ridiculously screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Catman was interrupted by nine dimwitted Care Bears that were lured by his diary. Catman panicked; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling angered, he carefully reached for his salt shaker and thoughtfully backhanded every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the jungle, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the time machine rolling up. It was Doggie.

----o0o----

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Sears to pick up a 12-pack of paper clips, so he knew he was running late. With a deft leap, Doggie was out of the time machine and went flamboyantly jaunting toward Catman's front door. Meanwhile inside, Catman was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the diary into a box of paper clips and then slid the box behind his coffee table. Catman was displeased but at least the diary was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Catman explosively purred. With a apt push, Doggie opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some annoying tool in a Vette,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Catman assured him. Doggie took a seat nearby where Catman had hidden the diary. Catman cringed trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Doggie was distracted. All of a sudden, Catman noticed a abrasive look on Doggie's face. Doggie slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Catman felt a stabbing pain in his chest when Doggie asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the diary right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A selfish look started to form on Doggie's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's salt shakers from when she used to have pet hamsters. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Doggie nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Catman could react, Doggie deftly lunged toward the box and opened it. The diary was plainly in view.

Doggie stared at Catman for what what must've been two seconds. A few minutes later, Catman groped exotically in Doggie's direction, clearly desperate. Doggie grabbed the diary and bolted for the door. It was locked. Catman let out a eccentric chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Doggie,' he rebuked. Catman always had been a little abrasive, so Doggie knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Catman did something crazy, like... start chucking salt shakers at him or something. Soon afterward, he gripped his diary tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Catman looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Doggie. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame eleven days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Doggie. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Catman walked over to the window and looked down. Doggie was gone.

----o0o----

Just yonder, Doggie was struggling to make his way through the bush behind Catman's place. Doggie had severely hurt his foot during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Care Bears suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the diary. One by one they latched on to Doggie. Already weakened from his injury, Doggie yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Care Bears running off with his diary.

But then God came down with His ingenious smile and restored Doggie's diary. Feeling frustrated, God smote the Care Bears for their injustice. Then He got in His Viper and jetted away with the fortitude of 2,000 marmots running from a little pack of kittens. Doggie flipped with joy when he saw this. His diary was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in eight minutes his favorite TV show, Lizzie McGuire, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When bunnies meet hand grenade'). Doggie was elated. And so, everyone except Catman and a few unborn fetus-toting puppies lived blissfully happy, forever after.

Similar Documents

Premium Essay

What Is Chewy-Personal Narrative

...I was 5 years old and I lived in the country in Wichita. We had a dog her name was Chewy. She was a blonde pit bull. She had a fun personality. She liked to climb trees. She liked to swim. Also, she was very protective. She would bark at people who she had never seen before. One day my uncle let her outside. She went down to the river to go swimming. Someone came to the river and saw her. Chewy got out of the river when she saw him and started to bark and wag her tail. A couple of minutes later my uncle heard a loud BANG. He went to see what it was and he saw her laying on the ground. The guy was gone and she had a hole in her head. My uncle and my dad put her behind an old mattress. When I went inside and asked what was wrong and why...

Words: 438 - Pages: 2

Premium Essay

Plantation Creative Writing

...shut my eyes without seeing the dogs from a few nights back. I am paranoid at this point. Ever since the last run in, I think I might be imagining things. I see and hear things like shadows hiding, footfalls following my every move, and the distant, yet real voices and barks of not-so far off predators. Everything is a threat, and everything is evaluated as one. I’ve even started checking inanimate objects for threats, in case there should be something hazardous to my hopefully soon approaching freedom. In spite of constant fear, the two most alarming things I have yet faced are but...

Words: 752 - Pages: 4

Free Essay

Sdadasd

...Brallan Gantiva Kymberly Barron Enc1101 6-9:40 pm October 21, 2013 Reader response #3”A Wobegon Holiday Dinner “ A Wobegon Holiday Dinner is an essay, that Garrison Keillor shared a memorable Thanksgiving that he had with his family. Which he recalled after calling his cousin “Duke” (Mary Ann) of an embarrassing episode that she had in thanks giving years ago, when she vomited at that thanksgiving. This essay takes back years ago, when I had to witnessed an event that is really similar which happened to Keillor’s cousin. We were taking dinner with my sister, we were eating grilled steak. But there’s was something really weird in her grilled steak, which had a big piece of fat on it , and my sister ate it , and she puked all over her plate. It was really disgusting, and disturbing. Since then I hate grilled steak. Questions 1-4 A Wobegon Holiday Dinner 1- Keillor clearly chose a particularly memorable Thanksgiving to share in this essay. What does the vomit episode contribute to the larger story about how his family celebrated Thanksgiving? The vomit episode 2- Celebrating holidays together is often viewed as one way communities – including families – stay strong. Yet, in what respects is Keillor’s essay a response to the assumption ‘ communities provide us with a sense of stability’ Keillor’s family Thanksgiving tradition were unchanging to promote a sense of stability. But his Thanksgiving tradition with his family aren’t always...

Words: 1052 - Pages: 5

Premium Essay

Personal Statement: Basset Hound Puppy

...It was Sunday, December 24, 2015 and all I wanted for christmas was a basset hound puppy, or just a puppy in general! Mom said, “no, they are too much care!” Dad said, “yea, they are the cutest thing, ever!!” No one in my family agree on a dog but if santa brings one then we will have to agree!! I meet every santa i could to remind him that I really wanted a puppy for christmas!! And I have a strong belief that santa will bring me a puppy this year, last year i asked for a puppy but it was not the first thing on my list, this year it is the FIRST thing on my list, you can’t miss it, It is big and in bold letters, my list this year was….. A PUPPY!! A new sketchbook Puppy toys And a phone I did not care about the phone, sketch book, or the...

Words: 620 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

Online Classes vs Traditionalasses

...GERMAN SHEPHERD DOGS Introduction Dogs are considered to be the world’s most common pet. In the course of human history, millions of domesticated dogs have been kept either as companions at homes or helpers in various needs. They are loved not simply on account of their unparalleled display of intelligence and perceived usefulness, but also because they are the kind of animals that are able to establish long-term relationships with man. As a matter of fact, man’s fondness for dogs is something that manifests frequently. If one were to take a stroll at a park or jog on a beach, one is almost sure to find someone taking his or her pet dogs for a walk. As indeed, one can rarely find a house in the neighborhood that is not a home for a dog or two. The military and police forces use them to track persons or things, inasmuch as shepherds seek their help to protect herds from wolves and other threats. If these say anything about them, they only show that dogs play a very important role in human affairs no other kind of animals can perhaps fill. The German Shepherd Dog Among the many breeds of dogs available for keeping, there are those that stand out as most commonly-owned. One example is the German Shepherd Dog. Said to have been bred somewhere in mid-western Europe during the 1800’s, German Shepherd Dogs now figure in many homes kept as pets or in military units trained as attack dogs or sniffers during police operations. German Shepherd Dogs possess an unmistakably...

Words: 1244 - Pages: 5

Free Essay

Refuge

...strain is what wears down on us slowly whittling away years of our lives. This being the case, why are we not already dead? The answer is relaxation, try it. No really, right now, put down this paper, close your eyes and take a deep breath in through your nose, hold it for eleven seconds, now slowly and as quietly as possible exhale through your mouth. Did you feel your shoulders drop? That’s a lot of tension you just let go of. Believe it or not you’ve been carrying with you all day. We should take thirty second out of our day every chance we get to do this because we need to relax or unwind. This is an example of a refuge in its simplest form. Refuge is known as many different things; retreat, vacation, or break. The list goes on and on. We live such high anxiety lives that we need to take breaks periodically. The real question is how? There’s a place in everyone’s fantasy that they long to visit the mountains, a room in a relative’s house, a tropical island. These places are individual and beautiful. And just like beauty, it’s in the eye of the beholder as to what their refuge is I have many refuges, some real and some imaginary. For example, one of my imaginary refuges is an island in the middle of a large lake. But this is no ordinary lake; it’s located on top of and in the middle of a volcano’s crater. And when I sit on my beach house’s porch, looking out at the sun set, it looks as though the world ends because the water pours off of the rim of the volcano. The reflection...

Words: 1320 - Pages: 6

Free Essay

Dog Breeds

...seems to have been introduced by the Chinese. It was only brought to Europe at the end of the nineteenth century. The Chihuahua is named after the Mexican state of Chihuahua where he was brought to the rest of the world by travelers. This breed is believed to have been sacred to the Pre-Columbian Indian nations. |   | Temperament | The Chihuahua is a good companion dog. Courageous, extremely lively, proud and enterprising, it gives and demands affection. Bold and saucy, it moves swiftly to avoid being stepped on. Chihuahuas are strong-willed, intensely loyal and become very attached to their owners, even to the point of jealousy. Chihuahuas generally recognise their own breed, but sometimes disapprove of other breeds. They are very intelligent although a bit stubborn, and are trainable with patience, persistence and practice. |   | Upkeep | The Chihuahua is a lively dog that nonetheless can get its exercise running from room to room indoors. It enjoys exploring the yard or going for short walks on a leash and especially enjoys accompanying its owner on outings. The Chihuahua is not an outdoor dog; it hates the cold and seeks out warmth. Care of the long coat entails brushing two to three times a week. | | Official Breed Standard | CHARACTERISTICS: An alert and swift...

Words: 12556 - Pages: 51

Premium Essay

Dan Everett and the Piraha

...Implications for Grammar When Linguist Dan Everett was sent to the Amazon Jungle to live with the Pirahã people, his mission was to learn their language and convert them to Christianity. What he left with, many years later, were theories about grammar and language he never thought he would discover. His views about language changed drastically, from agreeing with former colleague at Illinois State University, Noam Chomsky, to rejecting those views wholeheartedly. He spent years formulating new hypotheses based on his study of the Pirahã people, and is a big proponent of language being culture-based, that is to say that how people speak has a lot to do with their culture. While living in the Amazon, Everett changed in many ways including, not only beliefs and ideals about grammar and language, but also in beliefs and ideals of religion. To understand how Everett was affected by the Pirahãs, we must first understand where he came from and what he believed prior to meeting them. Everett was born in Southern California and said in an interview with Radio New Zealand’s Kathryn Ryan that he did not consider himself or his family religious. When he was in high school, however, he met a woman who would soon become his wife who was extremely religious to the point that she eventually converted him to Christianity. He became such a genuine believer that he would preach his beliefs on the streets and ultimately became an ordained minister. What he believed when it came to language...

Words: 2530 - Pages: 11

Premium Essay

A Fall Before Rising: the Story of Jai Jaikumar (a)

...course lies in the fact that, at altitudes of 25,000 feet and beyond, the effects of low atmospheric pressure upon the human body are so severe that really difficult mountaineering is impossible and the consequences even of a mild storm may be deadly, that nothing but the most perfect conditions of weather and snow offers the slightest chance of success, and that on the last lap of the climb no party is in a position to choose its day . . .1 Eric Shipton, Upon that Mountain O A RAPID DESCENT He was 24,000 feet above sea level, but the light was fading, and so Jai Jaikumar knew that he had little time to admire the view. It was 4 p.m. on a summer day in 1966, and Jai, an engineering student at the Indian Institute of Technology, stood with one of his closest climbing buddies at the summit of a Himalayan mountain. The final ascent that day, beginning at high camp at 2 a.m., had been rougher and more difficult than the pair had anticipated. They had originally set 1 p.m. as their “turnaround time,” the point at which considerations of safety dictate that climbers should abandon their ascent and head back to high camp. However, the prospect of waiting a few more days to again challenge the summit held little appeal for Jai and his companion. They were both healthy and experienced at climbing despite their youth, and so when 1 p.m. came, the decision to press on had been easy to make. Now, at the pinnacle, their perseverance was rewarded, but they were well aware that time...

Words: 2051 - Pages: 9

Premium Essay

Dont Shoot the Dog

...eVersion 1.0 - click for scan notes DON'T SHOOT THE DOG Karen Pryor To my mother, Sally Ondeck; my stepmother, Ricky Wylie; and Winifred Sturley, my teacher and friend. Contents Foreword 1—Reinforcement: Better than Rewards In which we learn of the ferocity of Wall Street lawyers; of how to—and how not to—buy presents and give compliments; of a grumpy gorilla, a grudging panda, and a truculent teenager (the author); of gambling, pencil chewing, falling in love with heels, and other bad habits; of how to reform a scolding teacher or a crabby boss without their knowing what you've done; and more. 2—Shaping: Developing Super Performance Without Strain or Pain How to conduct an opera; how to putt; how to handle a bad report card. Parlor games for trainers. Notes on killer whales, Nim Chimpsky Zen, Gregory Bateson, the Brearley School, why cats get stuck in trees, and how to train a chicken. 3—Stimulus Control: Cooperation Without Coercion Orders, commands, requests, signals, cues, and words to the wise; what works and what doesn't. What discipline isn't. Who gets obeyed and why. How to stop yelling at your kids. Dancing, drill teams, music, martial arts, and other recreational uses of stimulus control. 4—Untraining: Using Reinforcement to Get Rid of Behavior You Don't Want Eight methods of getting rid of behavior you don't want, from messy roommates to barking dogs to bad tennis to harmful addictions, starting with Method 1: Shoot the Animal, which definitely works, and ending with...

Words: 65349 - Pages: 262

Premium Essay

Ragamuffin

...Need Assistance? Click "Chat Now" to chat with a Live Operator. Chat Now No Thanks! The Ragamuffin Mystery CHAPTER ONE Off in the Caravan “This is going to be just about the most exciting holiday we’ve ever had!” said Roger, carrying a suitcase and bag down to the front door. “Diana, bring that pile of books, will you, before we forget them?” Diana picked them up and ran down the stairs after Roger. At the front door stood a caravan. Diana stood and gloated over it for about the twentieth time. “Fancy Dad buying a caravan!” she said. “And oh, what a pity he can’t come with us after all!” “Yes - after all our plans!” said Roger. “Still, it’s a jolly good thing Mummy didn’t back out, when she heard Dad had to go off to America - I was awfully afraid she would! My heart went into my boots, I can tell you.” “Same here,” said Diana, stacking the books neatly on a shelf in the caravan. “Have we got our bird-book - we’ll see plenty of birds on our travels, and that’s my holiday task - writing an essay on ‘Birds I have seen’.” “Well, don’t forget to take the field-glasses then,” said Roger. “They’re hanging in the hall. I say - what did you think about Mummy asking Miss Pepper to come with us, now that Daddy can’t manage?” Miss Pepper was a very old friend of their mother’s. The children were fond of her - but Roger felt rather doubtful about having her on a caravan holiday with them. “You see - she’s all right in a house...

Words: 38887 - Pages: 156

Free Essay

Ano Ang Kahulugan Ng Ipinagunita ?

... Pavo Submitted by: Gerard C. Balazo Table Of Contents I. A Dark Brown Dog II. A Haunted House III. Araby IV. The Winepress V. A Dark Brown Dog Stephen Crane A child was standing on a street-corner. He leaned with one shoulder against a high board-fence and swayed the other to and fro, the while kicking carelessly at the gravel. Sunshine beat upon the cobbles, and a lazy summer wind raised yellow dust which trailed in clouds down the avenue. Clattering trucks moved with indistinctness through it. The child stood dreamily gazing. After a time, a little dark-brown dog came trotting with an intent air down the sidewalk. A short rope was dragging from his neck. Occasionally he trod upon the end of it and stumbled. He stopped opposite the child, and the two regarded each other. The dog hesitated for a moment, but presently he made some little advances with his tail. The child put out his hand and called him. In an apologetic manner the dog came close, and the two had an interchange of friendly pattings and waggles. The dog became more enthusiastic with each moment of the interview, until with his gleeful caperings he threatened to overturn the child. Whereupon the child lifted his hand and struck the dog a blow upon the head. This thing seemed to overpower and astonish the little dark-brown dog, and wounded him to the heart. He sank down in despair at the child's feet. When the blow was repeated, together with an admonition in childish sentences, he turned...

Words: 7662 - Pages: 31

Free Essay

Harvest

...Camels Camels are herbivores; they eat desert vegetation, such as grasses, herbs, and leaves. How do camels adapt to their environment? Camels have many adaptations that allow them to live successfully in desert conditions. Deserts are hot and dry. Winds blow sand all around, so a camel has long eyelashes. It has nostrils that can open and close. Why do camels have long eyelashes? The long eyelashes keep sand out of the camel's eyes. Thick eyebrows shield the eyes from the desert sun. Why does a camel have nostrils which can close? A camels nostrils can close so it doesn't get sand up its nose. Other Adaptations: 1. A camel can go a week or more without water, and they can last for several months without food. They can drink up to 32 gallons (46 litres) of water at one drinking session! 2. Camels store fat in the hump, not water. The fat can be metabolised for energy. 3. Unlike most mammals, a healthy camel's body temperature fluctuates (changes) throughout the day from 34°C to 41.7°C (93°F-107°F.) This allows the camel to conserve water by not sweating as the environmental temperature rises. 4. Camels feet are wide so they can walk on sand more easily. Their huge feet help them to walk on sand without sinking into it. 5. Camels have thick lips so they can eat the prickly desert plants with out feeling pain. 6. The colour of their bodies helps them to blend into their environment. 7. Camel's ears are covered with hair, even on the inside. The hair helps keep...

Words: 6422 - Pages: 26

Free Essay

Film Sound

...Semester Term Paper: Film Sound Katayoun Nawabi University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill On my honor, I have neither given nor received aid in completing this assignment. ­­­­­­­­­­­­_____________________________ Katayoun Nawabi In analyzing film, critics constantly gloss over the importance of the use of sound. Those critics that do touch on the function of sound often underestimate its role in the overall impact of the film as a whole. There are those that are of the opinion that there has been little, if any, real contributions made by sound in film. Should sound have been added to film at all? A look back at the history of film, from silent movies to “talkies” to major motion pictures of the 1990s, will help establish the fact that film has not only benefited from the addition of sound, but has only gotten more sophisticated with time. “Reevaluating the role of sound in film history and according it its true importance is not purely a critical or historical enterprise. The future of cinema is at stake. It can be better and livelier if it can learn something valuable from its own past” (Chion, 1994, p. 142). There is no argument that, in cinema, it is the image that will continue to radiate power and spectacle. However, the technological and conceptual advances that have been made over the decades reinforce the fact that it is the role of sound to decorate the image and “show” us what it wants us...

Words: 3379 - Pages: 14

Premium Essay

Poem

...Classic Poetry Series Robert Frost - poems - Publication Date: 2004 Publisher: PoemHunter.Com - The World's Poetry Archive "In White": Frost's Early Version Of Design A dented spider like a snow drop white On a white Heal-all, holding up a moth Like a white piece of lifeless satin cloth Saw ever curious eye so strange a sight? Portent in little, assorted death and blight Like the ingredients of a witches' broth? The beady spider, the flower like a froth, And the moth carried like a paper kite. What had that flower to do with being white, The blue prunella every child's delight. What brought the kindred spider to that height? (Make we no thesis of the miller's plight.) What but design of darkness and of night? Design, design! Do I use the word aright? Anonymous submission. Robert Frost www.PoemHunter.com - The World's Poetry Archive 2 A Boundless Moment He halted in the wind, and -- what was that Far in the maples, pale, but not a ghost? He stood there bringing March against his thought, And yet too ready to believe the most. "Oh, that's the Paradise-in-bloom," I said; And truly it was fair enough for flowers had we but in us to assume in march Such white luxuriance of May for ours. We stood a moment so in a strange world, Myself as one his own pretense deceives; And then I said the truth (and we moved on). A young beech clinging to its last year's leaves. Robert Frost www.PoemHunter.com - The World's Poetry Archive ...

Words: 22239 - Pages: 89