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A Long Way Gone

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Aj Jackson

Ehrensaft 12/1/13 A long way gone essay Ishmael Beah shows a loss of innocence all throughout his book "A long way gone". He shows us just how his childhood was taken from him and how that translates into loosing his innocence in the following ways. In the beginning of the story he talks about how horrific it was to see his village ransacked and burned. He talks about how scared he is like when the rebels found him and he looked into his brother's eyes and could feel the fear but tried to hide it. He was just trying to survive and yet people at other villages saw him as a threat and this made him sad. He didn't understand why people could be afraid of him when he was just an innocent kid trying to stay alive after he had lost everything. The first part in the story where I think Ishmael starts to lose his innocence is when he and his friends steal corn from a younger boy so they can eat. "One evening we actually chased a little boy who was eating two boiled ears of corn by himself. He was about five years old and was enjoying the corn that he held in both hands, taking turns biting each ear. We didn't say a word or even look at each other. Rather, we rushed on the boy at the same time, and before he knew what was happening, we had taken the corn from him."(Beah 30). I don't believe he completely loses his innocence because he did it to survive not for the thrill of doing it. "I felt guilty about it for a few minutes, but in our position, there wasn't much time for remorse."(Beah

31). In that quote he mentions he feels guilty but I think what he did is justified by his

situation, because he is just trying to survive. The next part where Ishmael loses part of his innocence is when he discovers that his parents were in the next town but he doesn't make it there before the rebels attack and he realizes he will never see them. If he wouldn't have stopped to helped the old man he could have made it to see his family. He says that he wishes he would have died with them instead of living with the pain of losing them. At this point is the first time he thinks to use violence against the man because he did not get what he wanted. I think at this point something snapped inside inside him and he realized that he didn't care if he lived or died anymore because he had nothing left to live for. Not to long after this Ishmael is picked up by the soldiers and becomes one of them. At first his innocence is still there because he still has his morality. But after he starts snorting cocaine and smoking weed he suddenly becomes numb to what is going on around him and begins killing people. I think the point at which he completely loses his innocence is when he slits the throat of one of the prisoners for a game. At that point in the story Ishmael has lost his innocence and turns into an evil man. He has no morality and no remorse for the people he kills. He thinks it's fun to act like this, he thinks it's all a game, and I don't know if he fully understands what he is doing but he is a young teen so maybe he does and that just makes it worse then losing just his innocence. He loses everything he once was, this is a completely new

side of him, a side he probably never thought he had. With all the drugs in his system his

judgement was clouded and that's what led him down this path. Ishmael lost his innocence little bits at a time but once he is picked up by UNICEF and begins his recovery he also begins to get back his innocence. I think he will never be completely innocent again because of the things he has done but he becomes innocent non the less. He learns to accept what he had done and he understands how bad it was and he learns to grieve. Although Ishmael will never be able to make up for what he has done at least he is trying to do something positive with his life but being a spokes person for UNICEF and writing his memoir. The things he did we're terrible but he has gained his innocence and can sleep at night knowing he is making a difference in the world now.

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