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Boyfriend: A Narrative Fiction

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"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Mabel exclaimed, standing in front of the frightened creature. "He's shaking in the corner scared! He's basically like a little kitten in a beast's body! Daddy, would you shoot a little kitten?"

Grunkle Stan paused, then sighed. "Alright, Mabel. Let's give the thing a chance to tell its story."

"Thank you very much." The beast said, as he stopped cowering in fear and bowed to the Pines. "I am indeed Bigfoot. I come here from the forest, after being kicked out of my last home. I was going to stay there a little while longer, but, well...I fell in some mud and just couldn't handle being so dirty out in public! Nice to meet you all."

"Uh, yeah, hey." Grunkle Stan said. "Before you get any ideas, I will charge rent, mythological beast or not."

"Dad!" …show more content…
"He just got here. Remember how you got annoyed with me when I bombarded you with questions when you got here?"

"Yeah, Dipper, have a little respect." Grunkle Stan scolded. "So, uh, Mr. Bigfoot, how much do you think you're worth?"

"Dad!" Mabel yelled. "You're no better."

"Do you play video games?" Soos asked Bigfoot.

"I used to." Bigfoot replied with a melancholy sigh. "They banned me from PlayEnd, though. I went to pick up my copy of Superb Oarim Solar System, destroyed just a wee bit of merchandise on accident, and the manager was all like 'wah wah, you need to leave'."

Soos and Mabel chuckled, while Dipper was concerned that Bigfoot might be underestimating just how destructive his events were.

"Enough diddy-daddling!" Mabel suddenly yelled, grabbing Bigfoot's hand and locking it with hers. "You're my new bro, bro! Or sis. Wait, do you have a gender?"

"I'm a ma..." Bigfoot began, before thinking again. "You know, come to think of it, I'm not entirely sure."

"You're my new gender-neutral sibling!" Mabel exclaimed, hugging Bigfoot. "We've got a lot of sibling bonding to catch up

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