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Breakdown of Relationships

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Submitted By Sophoh26
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There are many reasons relationships can break down, Duck suggested 3 main reasons in 1999. Firstly, lack of skills; this refers to to inability to connect with one another for example if someone lacks social skills they will be unable to communicate their satisfaction or attract with their partner, this leads to an unrewarding outcome and the relationship may breakdown. This theory of thinking your partner isn't interested is supported by extramarital affairs, Boekhout(1999) used university students to say what would lead to an affair; for males it was lack of sexual stimuli and for women it was lack of emotional satisfaction. Both suggesting that their partners aren't interested in them either sexually or emotionally. This study lacks population validly as only university students were used, therefore it can't be generalised to the majority of the population. The reasons for to have an affair may change with age and the marital statues of the couple. This is supported by real world application, couples who struggle with social skills can take part in a Couples Coping Enchantment training, this sensitises couples to the idea of equity and aid them in communicating. Cina et al (2003) compared to groups of couples a controlled group who didn't receive CCET and the test group who did, she found that the test group had a better quality of marriage after receiving the training. This study despite having a large participant number can not be generalised to the entirety as it has cultural bias. In some cultures equity is seen differently and other aspects of marriage have more value.
The lack of skills also links into the lack of stimulation, this is the idea that if it is felt that a reactions hip isn't going anywhere or boredom the relationship will breakdown, this is supported by Baxter.
If a couple are unable to see each other it may cause a strain on the relationship, this is called maintenance difficulty, if this strain is to great the relationship may breakdown. This theory is challenged by Rohling (1995) who found that 70% of his student participates have had a long distant relationship before. Also Holt and Stone suggested that despite a long distance if couples can reunite regularly than a relationship may still be satisfying and maintained. This theory has become outdated, in the modern world new forms of communications allow people to stay connected despite distance.
Once there is dissatisfaction in a relationship a breakdown may occur, Rollie and Duck created the model of breakdown in 2006. It has 6 stages, the first being the breakdown which is the entail dissatisfaction within a relationship. The intraspsychic process is when the individual re-evaluates the relationship taking into consideration the costs of the relationship and possible alternatives. Next is the dyadic process is when the partner is told about the dissatisfaction, this is followed by the social process of going public talking to friends and family, this theory may be unmet in real world situations with the stages being acted out in different ways. Memories and other things need to tided up, this occurs in the grave-dressing process, the couple may decide here if they continue being friends, finally the resurrection process is where the couples move on and reestablish their own social value and learn from the mistakes of the relationship. The theory states that at any stage the couple may work it out and go back to a maintained relationship, this may be aided in the social process by friends and family.
This theory is supported by investigations done by Tashiro and Frazier, (2003) who found that undergraduates not only suffered emotional distress but also personal growth after breaking up with a romantic partner. This provides evidence for the resurrection process in which a person builds on the information they gathered from the last relationship, preparing them for the next one. As with many of the investigations into break downs in relationships this study has ethical issues, separating from a romantic partner can be a sensitive subject and pursuing information may effect the participants. It may also endanger the participation if they were in an abusive relationship prior they may fear recrimination as a result of partaking in the study.
The model of breakdown is supported by Lee who's studies where specific to non-marital couples, because of this there are some differences. Both theory's show how the partner feels dissatisfaction and then exposes it. In Lee's theory the next to steps suggest the couple talk it out and attempt to resolve the problem, if this doesn't happen the relationship is terminated. Unlike Rollie and Ducks model there is no recreation stage for the partners to move on and grow.
The entirety of this theory has face validity, it corresponds to real life relationships and can be used to prevent the breakdown of relationships.

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