Free Essay

Conflicts in Divorce

In: Business and Management

Submitted By mrfla813
Words 3338
Pages 14
Executive Summary - Divorce
Group 1

Statistics and History - Anteous Lewis 1
Types of Divorce - Christopher Leto 3
Conflicts and Negotiations - Spencer Griffin 6
Third Party Negotiation - Tiquoia Francis 7
Effects and Influences on Family Life - Joshua Norman 8
Works Cited 11

Statistics & History - Not surprisingly, divorce rates have only increased over time. There are a variety of factors that contribute to this, including general attitudes towards divorce and marriage in society. While statistics reveal a steady increase in divorce rates, it wasn't until the 70s that divorce became statistically prevalent. According to the CDC's report 100 Years of Divorce and Marriage Statistics, divorce rates went from less than 3% to almost 7% from the late 1800s to the late 1960s. There were a variety of factors that influenced divorce rates. The statistics below show the percentage of divorces that occurred out of the total number of marriages for a given year. Prior to 1867, divorce statistics were not recorded. While there certainly was a stigma attached to divorcing a spouse in the 1800s, divorce still happened on occasion. One factor that influenced divorce statistics at this time was the fact that women, outside of marriage, had very few economic opportunities. While the trend thus far in history had been for the divorce rate to increase, this isn't quite the case with the 30s. Due to the depression in the 20s, many couples stayed together because they couldn't afford the aftermath of divorce. It wasn't until the unemployment rate went down that the increasing divorce rate trend continued. Unemployment was at its highest in 1933, and as the unemployment rate declined throughout the late 30s, the divorce rate decreased as well. The 40s saw a distinctive spike in divorce rates right after World War II. Some have suggested that many families were strained under the burden of living with a man who may have been incapacitated during the war, or that many women had a new found freedom in working and didn't want to give that up. Regardless, the spike in statistics suggests that the end of the war definitely put a strain on family life. The 50s saw a decrease in divorce, and the rate remained relatively static until after 1967 when divorce laws begin to change. Divorce continued to rise steadily, taking a big jump in the 1970s. This may have been because no-fault divorce was first made available in the 70s. It was the first time a spouse could also cite irreconcilable differences as a reason for divorce, making a divorce much easier to obtain. Prior to this point, anyone wanting to end their marriage had to prove the presence of adultery or cruelty in the marriage. According to a 2011 report by the Census Bureau, divorce rates rose steadily during the 60s, 70s, and 80s. An interpretation of the information gathered by the Census Bureau over the decades shows that American divorce rates fluctuate. Although these statistics may not include all states each year, they show that the numbers of marriages and divorces or annulments are declining. This may perhaps mean that, in the future, the number of divorces occurring each year will decline even further. More recently, there was an economic crash that devastated the U.S. which may account for a reason to not divorce. During the timeframe of 2008-2011, many people were left unemployed or experienced a change in their household overall due to the financial crisis. According to University of Maryland sociologist Philip N. Cohen, the status of the economy influences the U.S. divorce rate because when adults are experience financial hardship, the likelihood of the marriage stays in-tact. Basically, divorces are costly which means during the recent recession as well as the one for the 1930s, families decided to stay together and brave through difficult financial struggles. Also, statistics show that people are getting married in their 30s which decrease divorce rates due to the two consenting adults are more stable in their lives (i.e. college-educated, careers). With the U.S. recovering from the recent recession, researchers have determined divorce rates will again fluctuate as couples will be able to afford the costs of separations.

Types of Divorce - On the subject of divorce there are many different branches or types which include; Summary divorce, uncontested divorce, default divorce, fault and no-fault divorce, mediated divorce, collaborative divorce, arbitration and finally contested divorce. Each of these various forms of divorce are unique in their own way, but in the end have the same absolute result which is the ending of a marriage.
Summary Divorce in most states is an expedited divorce procedure which is made available to couples that have not been married for very long (normally five years or less is the standard), don’t own much property, don’t have any children and do not have any significant joint debts. Both sides of the couple have to agree to the divorce and must file the court papers jointly. This type of divorce, also known as the simplified divorce involves a significantly less amount of paperwork than any of the other types of divorce, only a few forms are all it takes most often. These forms can be collected from almost any family court locally and can be done without the help of a lawyer.
Uncontested divorce is also another one of the few preferable methods of divorce. This type of divorce takes place when the two spouses work together to agree on the terms of the divorce and file the court papers cooperatively to make the divorce happen. With this course of action there will be no formal trial and neither spouse will even have to appear in court (ending on good terms).
Default divorce is when the court grants the divorce by “default” when a divorce is filed and one of the spouses does not respond. The divorce is then granted even though one of the spouses did not participate in the court proceedings at all. An example of a default divorce is if one of the spouses has left the country or their whereabouts are currently unknown. (Are there states where “No-fault” divorces are more difficult to obtain? For example, what about Florida?)
Fault and No-Fault divorce are two different types of divorce that are related to one another. In the past if a spouse wanted to get a divorce they had to prove in court how the other spouse was responsible for the destruction of the marriage which was known as a Fault Divorce. Now however there is a different route that can be taken which is when both spouses agree that there are irreconcilable differences between the two spouses and that the relationship has suffered irremediable damages which is why the marriage needs to come to an end.
Mediated divorce is when a neutral third party, called a mediator is called to sit in on the divorce sessions between the two spouses and tries to help resolve all the issues of the divorce. The mediator cannot make any decisions of their own; that part is up to the two spouses, however the mediator is there to help the two spouses communicate between each other until they are able to reach an agreement. The mediator can be any from a family friend or even a paid counselor.
Collaborative divorce is one of which that involves the hiring of lawyers by each spouse however, these lawyers are hired to work together to come up with a pleasing (you mean “acceptable?) situation for both parties. One lawyer is on each side but the issues are all dealt with cooperatively between the two lawyers. Each of the spouses have (has?) to agree to full disclosure of all information that will be necessary for fair negotiations. Both of the spouses and the lawyers will meet to discuss the settlement and it will be agreed upon that if a settlement cannot be reached through this process then the original attorneys will withdraw from the case and two new lawyers will be hired as the case is taken to court.
Arbitration is a very cut and dry type of divorce, it involves the hiring of a private judge called an arbitrator, who will then make all of the same judgments as a regular judge. Then whatever course or action the judge rules then both of the spouses must agree and follow the verdict of the judge.
Contested divorce is the type of divorce that most people imagine when they think of divorce... The cutthroat lawyers, the constant yelling and the metaphorical war between the two spouses over the property, children or whatever other assets the two spouses want to deprive the other of. This type of divorce is defined as when the two spouses cannot come to any agreements and instead take the issues to court for a judge to decide. The two spouses will then go through a series of processes including; the exchanging of information , settlement negotiations, hearings, and if a resolution has not been achieved by all of that then a court trial will be held, where again the fate of the two spouses rests in the hand of the judge.

Conflicts and Negotiations - When it comes to divorce, many people are aware of the personal conflicts that occur between two sides that have seen a marriage fail. However, many are unaware of conflicts that arise and negotiations that follow after two parties have decided to end a marriage. Generally speaking, most of the conflicts that arise during divorce negotiations revolve around three areas: children, finances, and property. In many cases where negotiations are centered around children, each party is negotiating who will receive custody of the children and to what extent, meaning whether or not it will be part time custody or full custody and whether or not the other party receives visitation rights. Also, child support payments become an issue, as many parties that receive custody of children require financial assistance to take adequate care of the children they are now responsible for. With regards to financial and property battles, negotiations typically revolve around how to divide assets and property that were purchased as a single party. Once married, many couples open joint bank accounts where money is pooled into one place and they make large purchases (i.e. homes or cars) as a single party. In effect, when a marriage ends both parties feel entitled to the property that was purchased as well as their share of the money that, until that point, was shared. These conflicts lead to negotiations that can sometimes turn ugly. There are many possibly pitfalls that parties who are negotiating a divorce can fall into. From making themselves a victim due to their own ignorance to being taken advantage of by the other party, there are many ways to “get the short end” in your negotiations for a divorce settlement. As attorney Lina Guillon writes in her article, “15 Critical Mistakes in Divorce,” many pitfalls that occur in divorce negotiations revolve around financial resources and ignorance or misinformation around them. For example, Grullon advises parties to always keep track of important financial decisions and keep copies of records, especially if you suspect that your partner is considering a divorce. It is also common for parties to neglect to consider that the IRS can tax any money that someone receives through a divorce settlement. Parties can also fail to accurately plan for the future by making mistakes such as not considering inflation in the future, not producing a budget for life after divorce, or not insuring a divorce settlement. Finally, it is important to not strictly rely on a divorce lawyer as the expense this can create can become outrageous. At the same time, it is important to not hire a divorce lawyer to simply attack the other party. It is very uncommon for a judge to “punish” someone simply for being a bad person as most divorce negotiations are handled on an objective basis. Attempting to punish the other party can also create further work for a divorce lawyer which, in turn, will raise costs drastically and quickly. Do not underestimate the power and helpfulness of mediation

Third Party Mediation -
Till Death do us part, the vow that is said before a couple is united in matrimony, but nevertheless some marriages fail and the two turn to divorce. Today, divorce has become a common occurrence and is increasing (I thought earlier Lewis had said divorces were declining? You need to be consistent). Many couples look to divorce litigation in negotiation issues however it usually do not set a common understanding for the couples because a solution to the problem is not in place. Using Alternative Dispute Resolutions (ADR) such as mediation can be an effective implementation for negotiating a divorce because a neutral independent party that help both parties gain an understanding of the final solution and both parties win as oppose to one in a court. Divorce is stressful and can cause all sorts of emotional and physical problems ranging from headaches, anxiety, depression, cost and other ailments which is why some couples seek mediation (Provda, 2013). Divorce negotiation(s) with lawyers tend to be stressful in itself because each respective lawyer is arguing to get the most for their client. A divorce mediator attempts to help couples reach an agreement on primary issues in a divorce such as child custody, property settlement and spousal maintenance without making a decision for them (Meyer, 2012). Before a mediation both parties must agree to hire a mediator with experience in mediation divorces where they understand both parties and advise them on certain issues also allowing both parties to communicate and have a mutual understanding.
Divorce mediation is an ADR that should be encouraged or mandated by the judicial system because the divorce rate is rapidly increasing and it would save a lot of money going through court, furthermore many other crucial cases can be scheduled instead of two lawyers preparing for trial. There are couple’s being married for few months or a year without going through any kind of process before the divorce and no reasonable solution is made as far as understanding communication and the issues each party has with another. (Careful with the sentence structure).
I observed a friend parent’s going through a divorce and the wife was recommended by her lawyer to seek mediation first so it would not get messy during a trial. Both individuals agreed to seek mediation and during the meeting times, both parties were identifying the what, how and why the marriage was leading to divorce. After mediation, both individuals did divorced, but a reasonable settlement was made for both parties to go away a winner and have a mutual understanding of one another. Although a mediator does not have real power to coerce a solution for divorce negotiations it is commonly being used today and should be encouraged for reasonable settlements.(Any statitistics?)

Effects & Influences on Family life -
Divorce, while a negotiation to prevent future conflicts and used as a tool to absolve all parties from a marriage, does have negative effects on the children involved. Pickhardt states, “Divorce introduces a massive change into the life of a boy or girl no matter what the age. Witnessing loss of love between parents, having parents break their marriage commitment, adjusting to going back and forth between two different households, and the daily absence of one parent while living with the other, all create a challenging new family circumstance in which to live.” (Pickhardt, Ph.D., 2011). These effects apply pressure to parties not involved in the contract but directly correlated to the circumstance applied. Children are involved in the entire remediation process by added stress factors, one of the largest is witnessing a qualitative change in quality of life. Children are forced either directly or indirectly to view the loss of love between two pillars in the stability of their lives. This added stress will reflect into their day to day activities and how they relate to loss and love. Several children experience very adult consequences for actions completely out of their control and some may never cope with it correctly. Divorce can also teach children that contracts, whether by choice or by association, do not hold any value beyond a title. Further, the responses taken by the children of divorce can vary greatly, depending on whether the child is still in childhood or adolescence. “The child's world is a dependent one, closely connected to parents who are favored companions, heavily reliant on parental care, with family the major locus of one's social life.” (Pickhardt, Ph.D., 2011). In young children it is commonly found that divorce can cause issues with trust and authority. This causes a divide for the family in which the child is now forced to move back and forth between the parents which creates unfamiliarity, instability and insecurity. What once the child thought to be stable and their way of life is now destroyed. Life as the child understood it before is no longer the same. As the child develops and matures, typically the child will overtly question authority and structure. The child will typically have difficulty managing common life tasks that were once automatic and habitual. “Children may even seek dangerous outlets such as risky friends or behaviors for this insecurity in finding trust in external sources to help allay the pain of loss” (Pickhardt, Ph.D., 2011). On the other hand, divorce will typically accelerate an adolescent’s independence and in turn more separated and distant from parents, more self-sufficient, where friends become favored companions and where the social life far extends outside of the family into a larger world of life experience. In most cases, an adolescent becomes more independent-minded and tends to deal more aggressively to divorce, often reacting in a mad, rebellious way, more resolved take care of himself since parents have failed to keep commitments to family that were originally made. This feeling will cause adolescents to feel discounted, act more autonomous and feel more impelled to act on their own. The overall effects of divorce on children can and typically will be very devastating. In most cases, while the parents attempt to maintain their children’s interest in divorce, the opposite is typically observed. Children will typically become confused and uncomfortable. Children and adolescents will both typically act out or behave in negative fashion. An extreme loss in trust and stability is incurred. These effects stick with children through the rest of their youth and in some cases the rest of their lives.

Bibliography/Works Cited
Pickhardt, C. Ph.D. (December 19, 2011) . Surviving (Your Child's) Adolescence: Welcome to the hard half of parenting. Retrieved from http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/

Choi, Caroline. "Divorce Confidential: Should I Negotiate or Litigate My Divorce?." The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, 25 Sept. 2013. Web. 19 Mar. 2014. <http://www.huffingtonpost.com/caroline-choi/divorce-confidential-shou_b_3990601.html>.

Guillen, Lina. "15 Critical Mistakes in Divorce." DivorceNet.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Mar. 2014.

Irvin, McKinley. “32 Shocking Divorce Statistics.” Web. 30 October 2012 http://www.mckinleyirvin.com/blog/divorce/32-shocking-divorce-statistics Jones M, Audrey.” Historical Divorce Rate Statistics” divorce.lovetoknow.com Web. March 2014

"The Different Kinds of Divorce." DivorceNet.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 17 Mar. 2014.

"What Are the Different Types of Divorce?" HowStuffWorks. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Mar. 2014.

"What Are The Different Types Of Divorce." - LawyerLocator.Lawyers.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Mar. 2014.

I believe the topic is an interesting one. However, you should all review the entire report looking for incosnstencies, confusing syntax and what appears to be a rather uncoordinated approach. You may want to consider giving court exampls (from different states showing how some of the conflicts emanating from divorce situations are handled by the courts.

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...children “Broken” Homes: The Effect of Divorce on Children Going through a divorce is a very difficult situation to be in. Usually it is what is happening between the parents, that concerns most people. However hurtful divorce is on the couple that is going through it, the children end up with the greatest amount of problems. These problems that the children develop are not always obvious, and do no always come to the surface right away. “Most often the children responded to the announcement [of the divorce] with apprehensiveness or anger . . . Several children panicked . . . finally, a great many of the younger children, about one-third of the entire group, didn’t really believe what they had been told. For these youngsters, the single announcement by the parents made it easier for them to pretend that the divorce would soon go away and to postpone their own response to the frightening changes in their lives” (Wallerstein 40-41). Children often try to stop the divorce of their parents, but there are many who seem to accept it at first. These who seem to accept it may even tell their parents that they are happy about the divorce. This is not necessarily the case, as one would see if he or she spoke with the child for a while. There are many things that divorce does to a family, and there are many things that is does to the child. These effects are rarely positive, or helpful depending upon the family’s prior situation. Divorce has many negative effects on the......

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Marriage

...EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN A Research Paper Presented to Dr. Antonio R. Yango College of International Hospitality Management University of Perpetual Help System Laguna In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Course Communication Arts 2 By Lianne Grace P. Caraan March 2012 INTRODUCTION Divorce harms! That is undisputed, to what extent and to what degree is the question we have set out to examine? The research that has been carried out, has been critiqued for biased-ness in sampling and later interpretation of data. Most researchers have determined that children of divorce have difficulty forming relationship of their own, are more likely to divorce themselves, are more prone to depression, become less religious and have reduced educational and financial attainment. In short the overall effect is proclaimed to be negative. There are most positive aspects out of divorce especially when there is no alternative option? We will examine these issues in detail and also see what sort of option does parents in conflict have and with what implications. All jokes abt couples who renovate their homes and then divorce, but it's not the upheaval of construction that causes people to part, but rather the prior tensions that caused them to make one last show of solidarity before admitting defeat. As a Catholic nation we are lucky because we were raised how to value our family that is why divorce advocates do not succeed in making it happen in...

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