Dying and Death—Extreme Grief Reactions to loss of a love one cannot be defined by a one size fits all statement, even though it is a common experience shared by man. Grief is in fact a process. One of the most widely accepted models of the grieving process is the concept of the five stages of grief that includes: (Bonanno, 2009)
1. “Denial and Isolation: first, we tend to deny the loss, and may withdraw from usual social contacts.
2. Anger: The grieving person may become furious at the person who inflicted the hurt (even if she's dead), or the world, for letting it happen. They may be angry with themselves for letting the event take place, even if, realistically, nothing could have stopped it.
3. Bargaining: the grieving person may make bargains with God, asking, "If I do this, will you take away the loss?"
4. Depression: The person feels numb, although anger and sadness may remain underneath.
5. Acceptance: This is when the anger, sadness and mourning have tapered off. The person simply accepts the reality of the loss” (Kubler-Ross, E.2005) These stages have no set pattern or pace of occurrence and cannot be forced upon the griever. The griever may go one step forward then take two steps backward. Should a person remain stuck in one stage or the other, the process of grieving cannot be complete resulting in what has been coined by the Mayo Clinic as extreme or abnormal grief. In abnormal or extreme grief healing is not achieved. This essay will provide an overview of five forms of extreme or abnormal grief, covering the topics of chronic grief, delayed grief, disenfranchised grief, exaggerated grief, and sudden grief.
Chronic Grief
Of the five forms of extreme grief, chronic grief tops the list. Chronic grief occurs when a grieving person has trouble with closure. The chronic griever may find that it is extremely hard to return to