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Do You Find Parts Complicated, Confusing Or Underdeveloped?

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1. What do you see as the writer’s main point in this draft? State the main idea in your own words. Is the essay focused on causes OR effects (these types of essays do not cover both)?

A. It was very clear that the essay was about the causes of depression in winter and with winter comes the holiday season, which can cause a lot of stress and depression for some people.

2. Is the thesis clearly stated? Is the thesis effective (not an announcement, not too broad etc.)? What is or isn’t clear? How could it be improved?

A. I think the thesis was very clear and there was a clear understanding that the cause of some of the depression was due to the stress of the holiday season, due to the cooking, cleaning and scrambling to get shopping done, along with the lack of sunlight.

3. …show more content…
Are causes or effects clearly stated, logically organized, and supported by details? Make suggestions for improvements. Mention which parts work well.

A. I think the essay was organized and was supported by and plenty of detail. It was clear the essay that was showing the effects of winter and the holiday seasons has on some individuals, causing them to have depression.

4. Do you find parts unclear, confusing, or underdeveloped? Write a note to the writer with questions and comments about the parts you have noticed. Which parts work well for you?

A. The essay was not confusing or unclear at all. In fact, there was plenty of research information from credible sources. Showing the effect and how and the percentage of individuals who get depressed during the winter season and the holidays.

5. Does the writer avoid making errors in critical thinking, especially hasty generalizations and confusing a time relationship for cause? Mark any parts that need improvements and make suggestions.

A. I didn’t see any generalize information that wasn’t supported a credible resources

6. Give the writer one suggestion about one change that you think would improve the

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