Elizabeth Anderson
Journal# 10
Professor Jordan
Section 3

Covey:

Covey’s fifth habit is: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood. He talks about the importance of communication and what he calls “empathetic listening” saying that most people listen with the intent to reply. When we listen we listen on one of four levels (ignoring, pretending, selective listening, or attentive listening) and very few people practice this highest form of listening which is empathetic listening. Empathic listening is effective when you have the best interest of the other in mind, if you genuinely seek the welfare of the others. This can be applied to real life in regards to effective parenting techniques. In an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond called “Father Knows Least” Raymond and his wife sign up for a Parenting class where they learn about active listening. In this clip he practices these techniques with his daughter Allie in order to try to get through to her about her bad behavior. Here, he tries to see her perspective, he relates to her, and makes eye contact and appropriate body gestures. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VOubVB4CTU I can apply this to my own life by trying to remember that I will actually be more effective if I put forth the extra effort to listen and engage and empathize with who I am speaking to, whether I want to or not. People will look up to me and respect me more if they feel like I genuinely care about them. Another thing that stuck out to me in Covey’s fifth habit which kind of builds off of what was mentioned above, was when he said that only 10 percent of our communication is represented by the words we say, another 30 percent by our sounds, and 60 percent by body language. That is a very small amount that is conveyed by our actual words. If we don’t use body language then it conveys that we are not listening , engaged, or interested in what the person we are speaking to has to say. In this clip of The Office, the women of the office are trying to teach Dwight active listening. Dwight argues that facial recognition is not important because listening comes “through the ears.” Ultimately, the clip shows that if someone doesn’t know how to actively listen then they are doomed in the business world. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qg8PIK74KO4&feature=youtube_gdata
60 percent is a large chunk of communication that is represented by body language alone. This can be very important when it comes to trying to make sure someone it listening to you, and to make sure that you are getting your point across in the most effective manner. Alternatively, it is important to remember that if I am listening to someone I owe it to the person talking to go out of my way to physically engage (make eye contact, nod, smile, etc) Covey’s sixth habit deals with synergy, and he says that the exercise of all of the previously mentioned habits prepares for the habit of synergy. By synergy Covey means, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. What was interesting to me was how Covey said Few people experience synergy in their lives because most people have been scripted into defensive or protective communications. He talks about synergy in the classroom and in business. But I feel like this can also be applied to sports teams. This past May, Buildingabetterathlete.com published an article titled “How to Build a Winning Team With Synergy" here, the author talks about the “gel- ing” of a team and how it can be attributed to Synergy. It is a combination of the right players and the right time, with the right values and attitudes. It is similar to business in that for a coach, it takes skill and assessing your players and recruiting the players that can really bring something to your team. This is why it is so important that coaches recruit and choose players who might not always be the breakout start with attitude, a lot of times you need a position filled, and you need someone who has a good attitude and who want’s to win. (Hawkins, 2013) I found this point very interesting because each year my cross country team picks a buzz word that we hear, repeat, and try to model out team by. Two years ago our word was “synergy,” until then I hadn’t heard the word associated with sports. Throughout the season our team tried to “run as one” and always emphasized the importance of a team, it felt almost magical. I think it could be very beneficial to try to apply this to my future careers in business.
Pink:
In part 2 chapter 5, Pink talks about the power of “story.” Pink describes story as “context enriched by emotion”. Even though facts are now available instantly and virtually for free, story will remain important because of the emotional Impact. It’s the emotional element that makes information stick. This can be applied to real life when it comes to mnemonic devices. In math class, in order to memorize the order of operation, we create a short story/sentence: "Please excuse my dear Aunt Sally"
Parenthesis, Exponents, Multiplication, Division, Addition, Subtraction. Additionally, people sing songs or jingles that help them remember things they need to. If the individual makes it up, they use their imagination and apply words or songs that mean something to them. I think this can be applied to my life when it comes to my marketing class, as I have mentioned before, the way to reach people is by impacting their heart instead of appealing to their heads with hard core facts. That’s why these commercials involving the hungry children or the hurt animals really stick with someone, people remember these commercials and the company behind them. I
In chapter 6, Pink talks about “symphony. ” As Pink says, “Symphony is largely about relationships.” The Conceptual Age will reward those who can see connections between seemingly unrelated areas. When I think of Daniel Pink's description of Symphony, it takes me to this clip (embedded below) of Disney and Pixar's Ratatouille. In the clip a Rat, Remmy, loves how the flavors of food are delicious individually, but together, they create a symphony of flavor. Going back to our cognitive ability, the cheese in the clip is like our left brain, sharp and square, and the strawberry represents our fruity and colorful right brain. Separate they are functional and great, but together they form a powerful force to be reckoned with. We need to focus on both separate parts, but we also must identify the whole picture and how all those separate parts relate. As Pink says, people must "know how to link apparently unconnected element to create something new." (pg 110) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yyah49_Oz78
They can blend their knowledge of diverse talents and skills to push the “boundary” of accepted practices. I am a double major, Philosophy and Communications as well as a student athlete. I would like to think that I can often try to take what I learn in running and apply to academics, these things are two seemingly unrelated things but I have found ways to make them relate to better my life. From running I have learned the importance of time management, teamwork, and dedication. I take this insight and try to apply it academically.
In the chapter Pink also talks about the three type of people that can thrive in the Conceptual age by looking at both the little and big picture. These people are: the boundary crosser, the inventor, and the metaphor maker. The one that stuck out to me was the boundary crosser. These are the people that don't just multi-task at home or on the weekends, but these are the people that live "multi-lives". They look for different perspectives in everyday thinking. They don't just know everything about their jobs, but about how it relates to other world ideas. Our society does not just need detailed thinkers, but thinkers that think insides, outside, and around "the box". Complexsports.com published an article that explored the top 10 athletes that made money after retiring. (Diaz, 2012) I think that many pro-athletes are “boundary-crossers” after they retire. Here they live multi-lives some go on to be producers, business owners, philanthropists etc. They take things from their “pastlife” and think apply it to their current one. Because they have lived “multi-lives” they are able to think in ways that others cannot. Magic Johnson invested in Starbucks before it was cool and put Best Buys and AMC Magic Johnson Theaters in urban areas in order to create jobs. He also owned a piece of the Lakers.? ( I can apply this to my life because I think a lot of the time people say that living “multi-lives” and multitasking is dangerous because we are spreading ourselves too thin. It is important to remember that it is good to think outside of the box because that is what differentiates me from someone else and will ultimately be what gets me ahead of someone else.
Professor Jordan:
In class we played a game in which the goal was to “maximize your points.” What we learned was that oftentimes when we get out of a win/ win situation and go to a win lose situation the losing team will often want to go into a lose/ lose situation. In other words we have the mentality of misery loves company. This can be applied to the real world through the concept of the Prisoners Delimma. In which two prisoners must decide whether to confess to a crime. Neither prisoner knows what the other will do. The best outcome for prisoner A occurs if he/she confesses, while prisoner B keeps quiet. In this case, the prisoner who confesses and implicates the other is rewarded by being set free, and the other (who stayed quiet) receives the maximum sentence, as they didn't cooperate with the police, yet they have enough evidence to convict. (This is a win-lose outcome.) The same goes for prisoner B. But if both prisoners confess (trying to take advantage of their partner), they each serve the maximum sentence (a lose-lose outcome). If neither confesses, they both serve a reduced sentence (a win-win outcome, although the win is not as big as the one they would have received in the win-lose scenario). I can apply this to my own life if I remember that if I want to stay ahead it is important to make sure that I communicate with others and not burn-bridges or make people unhappy. If I make people unhappy from the beginning it will most likely turn into a lose/ lose for both of us.
Professor Jordan also told us about the story at the Paris Airport, where someone was very rude to a worker at the flight desk and resulted in having his golf clubs “sent to Hong Kong.” In this situation a person may think that are winning but in reality they are losing. These situations are often seen in relationships with bosses and workers, housekeepers and homeowners etc. On of my favorite examples of this comes from the scene Scene from The Help. Here Hilly’s maid, Minny disobeys Hilly's order not to use the family's bathroom during a violent thunderstorm that makes a trip to the outhouse dangerous. Hilly fires her, and in retaliation, Minny bakes a chocolate pie into which she has baked her own feces, and takes it to Hilly in a fake act of contrition. While Hilly greedily eats two slices, she asks why her mother can't have a slice, to which Minny explains that it's a "special pie, just for Miss Hilly." A moment later Minny tells Hilly, "Eat my shit!" Hilly asks if Minny's lost her mind, and Minny replies, "No, ma'am, but you is about to. 'Cause you just did.” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DD9Ua7FuzyA I can apply this idea to my own life by remembering that it is important to know that people always have the option of retaliation, so it is a good idea to not burn your bridges and to be conscious about how my words and actions may effect others. If I don’t like a dish from a restaurant, I can either suck it up or politely send it back, but I sould not complain or be rude, because it may end up with spit in it.
Lastly, Professor Jordan talked about the Norm of Reciprocity. The idea behind this is that when the power differential is extreme, people will feel uncomfortable and will likely try to redress this imbalance. In this episode of the Big Bang Theory it explores the all to common Reciprocity Norm of gift giving between couples or spouses. Here the girlfriend has gotten her boyfriend a gift for Christmas, instead of being greatful he is mad because they means that he has to get her a gift that is on par with his. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofxxvc1KPa8 I can apply this to my own life in that I should always try to keep relationships as far from extreme as possible. As a captain it could be easy for me to exercise my power to an extreme. This could result in something bad because it would be more like a dictatorship and a democracy. It could result in resentment from my teammates as opposed to respect. I would be more effective as a captain if I respective the Norm of Reciprocity.
Works Cited
Diaz, A. (2012, January 10). 10 Athletes Who Made More Money After Retiring | Complex. Complex.com. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from http://www.complex.com/sports/2012/01/10-athletes-who-made-more-money-after-retiring#10
Everybody Loves Raymond Uses Active Listening - from Parent Effectiveness Training. (2013, February 21). YouTube. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VOubVB4CTU
Hawkins, N. (2013, May 13). Building A Better Athlete. Building A Better Athlete. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from http://www.buildingabetterathlete.com/how-to-build-a-winning-team-with-synergy/
Ratatouille tasting fireworks strawberry cheese.mov. (2011, February 9). YouTube. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yyah49_Oz78
Reciprocity Norm. (2012, April 6). YouTube. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofxxvc1KPa8
The Help - Minny's Chocolate Pie. (2011, August 17). YouTube. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DD9Ua7FuzyA
The Office Season 9 Episode 7; Teaching Dwight active listening. (2013, November 1). YouTube. Retrieved November 5, 2013, from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qg8PIK74KO4&feature=youtube_gdata