...Nurturing Love – Five Principal Ways An obsession with time has so worked into our social system that we scarcely notice we have left no time to love. Everywhere the slogan is ‘Hurry, Hurry, and Hurry’. To be aware of the need of the other, to spend time with others, to speak and act with patience and consideration, we must make time. | | Mother Teresa drew a beautiful unexpected connection between time and love: “Everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush,” she observed, “anxious for greater developments and greater riches and so on, so that children have very little time for their parents. Parents have little time for each other, and in the home begins the disruption of the peace of the world.” Slowing ourselves down is closely connected with increasing our one-pointed attention. When we are in a hurry, the problem is not only one of speed. Our attention is riveted on ourselves - our needs and desires - so there is no attention to give to those around us, who probably have needs and desires very much like our own. People are not boring; we get bored because our attention wanders. Giving someone our full attention says clearly: “You matter to me. You have my respect.” Almost every disruption in human relationships - between parents and child, friend and friend, worker and co-worker - can be prevented by learning control over attention, for, with mutual attention between people comes loyalty, interest and trust. To love we have to be able to do things for others...
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...Socrates’ and Love In the Symposium written by Plato we are recounted on the speeches made on the praise of love, by six different men. Beginning with Phaedrus, leading up to Socrates. In Phaedrus speech he sees Love as the oldest of Gods (Plato 10). He indicates how powerful an army would become simply by composing it of lovers. All because one is their absolute greatest, less cowardly in the presence of their lover. Therefore, more willingly to die for each other. Phaedrus is quoted saying, “Love is the most ancient of the gods, the most honored, and the most effective in enabling human beings to quire courage and happiness, both in life and death” (13). He viewed dying for your lover as extremely admirable and brave, and believed even the gods viewed it this way. Phaedrus gives an example of Alcestis, who dies for her husband and then her life is returned by the gods because of her “fine act” (11)....
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...Li-Young Lee's "This Room and Everything in It" [pic] “it had something to do / with death… it had something / to do with love”: The Eroticism of Memory in “This Room and Everything in It” Li-Young Lee’s “This Room and Everything in It” explores human memory as inherently erotic, in other words, as grounded in the restless vicissitudes of human desire. The act of memory figured in Lee’s poem involves the desire to transcend desire so as to reach a state of perfection in which the fundamental connection between love and death can be remembered. In the end, though, desire slips through memory’s fragile constructions and resumes its pre-rational primacy in the “room” that is human life. The principal trope at work in “This Room and Everything in It” centers upon the ancient art of memory, the practice of utilizing a multifaceted, imaginatively complex topos in which to store various items or facts wished to be remembered. The memorial topos, in addition to featuring a “room” of some sort – an internal dwelling through which the person practicing the art of memory could move in imagination, associating the items to be remembered with the unchanging characteristics of the room – also commonly involved a fully developed cosmology in which various divine figures were utilized as mnemonic objects. This ancient art reveals the inherent bi-directional connection between imagination and memory: humans imagine so as to remember and remember so as to imagine. In Lee’s poem, however, the...
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...Wong Kar-wai allows us to feel the masochistic nature of their relationship by never making it obvious whether they are being themselves or acting as the others partner. They construct this fantasy, and by never consummating the relationship they become in control of the affair and are able to delay the moment that they have to see things for how they really are. They are able to remain in this twisted, tragic, and emotionally violent fantasy in order to avoid the pain of their spouses affair. Man's relationship to love is very evident in the film. This may seem very obvious considering the title is In the Mood for Love. Love is what the two neighbors are searching for, but in a very odd way. They no longer feel the love and longing they...
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...We all have dreams. Everyone can say that there has been a time in their life where they have yearned to acquire or achieve something. Dreams can be about everything or anything; however, depending on the dream, it can sometimes be devastating to one’s morals and personality. A lot of times it is the body’s vivid and frequent imagination of dreams that lures oneself to their desires. Once a person’s desire has been fulfilled they may attempt to recreate and relive them over and over again. This obsession can have severe consequences by affecting the reality of one’s life. In American Gangster and The Great Gatsby the protagonists have underestimated the power of imagined desires. Frank, a leader of a Harlem gang in American Gangster, quickly...
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...A Midsummer Nights Dream by William Shakespeare is complied of many different themes including love, marriage, and jealousy. Desire is one theme that sticks out to the most. Desire is known to be a feeling of great want or need of someone or something. In A Midsummer Nights Dream various scenes in the play exhibit strong roles of desire. The quarrel of the four lovers, the issue of the changeling boy and the strength of the love potion are all parts of this play where desire played a role. The situation of the Changeling Boy is a great example of desire being displayed in A Midsummer Nights Dream. Titania took the boy as her personal helper and ended up in a quarrel with her husband Oberon because he desired the boy as well. However, Titania...
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...English 178 - poetry | Donne’s “Language of Love” in Elegy XIX: “To His Mistress Going To Bed”. | Poetry Semester Essay | | Telan Hamer | 18184626Tutor : Tamsyn Allies | | The poetic works of John Donne has been afforded high acclaim when it comes to his use of language in the dominion of love. In his elegy “To His Mistress Going To Bed”, he beckons for his lover to be bedded with him, describing her beauty as he tries to influence her to disrobe. Donne, in this poem, makes visible the way in which love and desire can be expressed in language attiring his poems with extended metaphor, metaphysical conceit and masterful wit, to the extent to which one may re-read the poem simply to savour the way in which Donne has sculpted his imagery. “To His Mistress Going To Bed” is seen to fall under the poetic genre known as ‘the blazon’, a genre of poetry that glorifies a woman by focusing on certain desirable body parts whilst using appropriate metaphor. Hence, the main focus of this essay will be to provide a commentary on the use of “the language of love” with reference to Donne’s blazon, by highlighting a series of appropriate examples that will provide a platform to analyse what it is that Donne is trying to convey in his poem, and how he accomplishes its conveyance. The examples will be analysed with reference to how the poet incorporates certain aspects of language such as diction, form, style, tone, rhetoric, and his use of figures of speech. The opening lines...
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...organs, the heart and brain. B. People make the mistake of confusing lust with love. II. One day in our lives will come that we have to stop for a moment. A. If you happen to skip a heartbeat. B. If you feel like you are lost in desire. III. love is not easy to describe. IV. lust is more of a carnal desire, and it does not rely on any rules. A. Lust can be misread as love. B. Lust can be very selfish. V. Lust can be a water down version of love. VI. Conclusion A. Is it love, or is it lustful feelings? 06 Aug 2011 Page. 1 LOVE Vs. LUST A human being has two major organs, the heart and brain. They are both in conjunction with each other, but not together as for they are distinct individuals. A heart is driven by pure feelings, as for the brain is fueled by bare thoughts. Many people make the honest mistake of confusing lust with love, but I have found a way to differentiate one versus the other. One day in our lives will come that we have to stop for a moment, and make the decision if we are driven by our heart or our brain. On that day we will look on to the eyes of our partner and decide if we are in love or lust. If you happen to skip a heartbeat as you gaze tenderly upon his/her eyes, then you are probably in love. On the other hand, if you feel like you are lost in desire, and crave for his/her touch, as you bite your bottom lip followed by devious...
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...approach to investigate on the topic of why men fall in love more than women. Men are more likely to falling in love if they over perceive sexual interest and physical attractiveness in women. Hence, women have become skeptical in a relationship. First hypothesis shows that men will usually fall in love with most recent partner, love more partners in their lifetime, experience more “love at first sight” and more unreturned love compared to females. The second hypothesis shows that individuals who over perceive others’ sexual interest will fall in love more frequently with chances to experience “love at first sight”. The third hypothesis states individuals who value physical attractiveness will have more partners, fall in love easily with latest attractive partner and more love at first sight experiences. The fourth hypothesis shows that individuals with a higher sexual desire will fall in love easily. The methods used were online questionnaire to both sexes with a sample size of 357. A qualitative research is used in a heterosexual community. Participants are 18-year-old and above. The dependent measures are the rating scale from 1 to 7. The specific measures used are timing of love, frequency of love, frequency of “love at first sight” and physical appearance of the latest partner. In hypothesis 1, the result shows that prediction on timing is not supported as there are no sexual differences between the falling in love time. Prediction on frequency is not supported as...
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...People define love in many different ways and use love to refer to a variety of emotions. The definition of love between couples is a combination of actions and feelings. Showing a pattern of attraction, caring, attachment, commitment, and intimacy are few of many forms of love. It’s often said that a person cannot make another fall in love unless the desire is there. Love is for people who equal each other, not in terms of wealth, but on the same emotional level. Attraction is the affection and excitement people give each other. This includes having a romantic desire to be around the other person. Intimacy is a crucial component for love and relationships, regardless of the nature. In order to know one another, one should share parts of him/herself. Intimacy also forms an emotional bond. Over time, an emotional bond strengthens and evolves so that two people merge closer and closer together. Attachment comes after the initial attraction. It is very easy to grow attached to someone by spending quality time, making one another laugh and cuddling. Attachment is a natural instinct when falling in love with someone. Love is the excitement someone feels when he/she is about to see their mate. Love is the desire to have someone else in one’s presence. Love requires commitment. Commitment is being monogamous; it’s the knowledge that one’s partner cares for his/her and has his/her back, no matter the circumstance. Couples that are strongly committed to one another will find the positives...
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...the amount of compassion and love in the relationship should be expressed through sexual fulfillment, according to Nelson. Nelson describes four dimensions which are not only components of love but necessary dimensions in order to satisfy sexually and amorously. These four dimensions are Epithymia, Eros, Philia, and Agape. Epithymia is the first of the four dimensions. This is the dimension of love that involves the sexual desire and fulfillment. This dimension involves all the physical aspects and expressions of love. This is a crucial element as all humans have strong desire to satisfy their bodily desires. Eros, the second dimensions of love, could be argued that it is the most natural and deep dimension of all. Eros is the yearning to be united with another. Nelson states it this way “Eros is aspiration and desire for the beloved” (Nelson, pg. 110). This is one of the most basic human instincts. I believe that Nelson would argue this point, by describing how Eve was created for Adam as he craved for the compassion of another. This predates the desire for physical fulfillment and as such can be considered more natural or innate. Philia is the third dimension of love and is a very interesting aspect of it. Philia is the type of love found in friendship. This can sometimes be described as brotherly love, which makes sense in the fact that the city of brotherly love is Philadelphia. The root words are the same. This type of love can be just as strong as or stronger...
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...What is passion? Dictionary definitions include "a powerful emotion, such as love, joy, hatred, or anger; ardent love; strong sexual desire; lust; the object of such love or desire; boundless enthusiasm or the object of such enthusiasm; an abandoned display of emotion, especially of anger", and so on. Let's look at passion in the positive sense. Your passions are an excellent indicator of what you are here to do. Before coming into body, we agreed to separation from our eternal selves, so that part can only speak to us through our emotions, saying "yes, that one" or "no, not this way". The more passionate you are on a certain topic, the more likely it is to be part of your assignment. So ask yourself: 1. What do you LOVE? 2. What do you...
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...Practical Philosophy November 2001 Plato’s theory of Love: Rationality as Passion Lydia Amir 'I … profess to understand nothing but matters of love.' Socrates in Plato’s Symposium. times, when due to their education and to political changes, women earned the right to love and to be loved as equals to men. When one dispels these misunderstandings related to the popular notion of Platonic love, one finds a great richness and depth in Plato’s theory of love. In explaining why love is so important to us and yet why it fails us so often, Plato’s view of love seems applicable to our time. It is common knowledge that a very high rate of divorce threatens our marriages. We expect a lot from the sexual passion we call love, but usually end up disappointed when the romance goes away. Yet we keep getting married, thinking that we are going to be the ones that will beat the system. If we fail, we change our partner and try again. We end up our love life as we began it, confused, afraid and as disappointed as we were hopeful. The malaise that characterises our love lives naturally finds its way to the philosophical consulting room. In this paper I shall attempt to show how Plato’s view of love can be helpful both in dispelling our confusion about love and in proposing some solutions to our suffering. A comprehensive account of Plato’s complex theory of love, an exhaustive presentation of the controversies involved in interpreting it or a thorough discussion of the problems it creates...
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...What is love? This is a question that can stand both rhetorically and philosphically. Rhetorically, the question of what love is has never succeeded in being accurately defined. Philosphically, theorists and other philosophers have never agreed on what the precise definition of "what love is" entails. Does it require succumbing entirely to the needs of one's lover? Does it require the desire to form a "we" between two lovers, or does love simply mean valuing someone else intrinsically, or for their own sake? None of these questions has ever received a precise definition. Although the question of what love is has never been rightfully answered, theorists have compiled several theories on what love should be, or what it entails for love to occur. One of these theories in particular is love as a union. Philosophers like Scruton, Solomon, and Nozick, collectively known as union theorists, have their own unique theories that come together to form a theory of love known as Love as Union. Love as Union According to the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, love as a union is a view that consists in one's desire to form a union, or a "we" with another individual. While union theorists believe that this desire does in fact exist, union theorists differ on their perspectives as to how this "we" is actually formed. Union theorists cannot seem to decide whether this "we" forms a new entity(this view is meant to be taken literally), or whether the "we" is a mere metaphor. The formation...
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... 2012 The Five Love Languages With the divorce rate at over fifty percent, what can be done to keep love alive? What is the secret to a happy marriage? These are questions that Gary Chapman explores and defines in The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. If couples are to communicate effectively with each other they must learn the language with whom they want to communicate. This book explores the five emotional love languages and the way couples speak and understand emotional love. Specifically the emotional love language a husband or wife would consider as their primary “love language”. Couples may be expressing what they know is their love language, but they may not be speaking their spouses love language and their spouse is interpreting it as a foreign language. Chapman insists when you identify and learn to speak your spouse’s primary love language you will have discovered the key to a long-lasting loving marriage. The Five Love Languages explored in Chapman’s book are: (1) Words of Affirmation, (2) Quality Time, (3) Receiving Gifts, (4) Acts of Service, and (5) Physical Touch. “At the heart of mankind’s existence is the desire to be intimate and to be loved by another. Marriage is designed to meet that need for intimacy and love” (Chapman). Each person in a marriage has an emotional love language that speaks loudly to them and when used by the other person it fills up the receivers emotional love tank. Gary Chapman...
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