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Mr Laptop

In: Novels

Submitted By iqmax
Words 381
Pages 2
It all started when our cliche, protagonistic figure, Bill Brasky, woke up in a haunted thicket. It was the second time it had happened. Feeling exceedingly exasperated, Bill Brasky poked a potato, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). A few unfulfilled decades later, he realized that his beloved iPad was missing! Immediately he called his fundamentalist, guilt-dispensing friend, Leroy Jenkins. Bill Brasky had known Leroy Jenkins for (plus or minus) half a million years, the majority of which were flamboyant ones. Leroy Jenkins was unique. She was plucky though sometimes a little... oafish. Bill Brasky called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Leroy Jenkins picked up to a very ecstatic Bill Brasky. Leroy Jenkins calmly assured him that most spotted wolf hamsters yawn before mating, yet man-eating capybaras usually charismatically belch *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Bill Brasky. Why was Leroy Jenkins trying to distract Bill Brasky? Because she had snuck out from Bill Brasky's with the iPad only two days prior. It was a enchanting little iPad... how could she resist?

It didn't take long before Bill Brasky got back to the subject at hand: his iPad. Leroy Jenkins sneezed. Relunctantly, Leroy Jenkins invited him over, assuring him they'd find the iPad. Bill Brasky grabbed his hippopotamus and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Leroy Jenkins realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the iPad and she had to do it fearlessly. She figured that if Bill Brasky took the nappy, busted-out hatchback, she had take at least eight minutes before Bill Brasky would get there. But if he took the Segway? Then Leroy Jenkins would be exceedingly screwed.

Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Leroy Jenkins was interrupted by two stupid marmots that were lured by her iPad. Leroy Jenkins cringed; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling frustrated, she aptly reached for her potato and aggressively groped every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the swamp, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the Segway rolling up. It was Bill Brasky.

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