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My Swan Song

In: People

Submitted By ForrestWinkler
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Pages 3
My Swan Song
By Forrest Winkler

“….The ‘swan song’ has become an idiom referring to a final theatrical or dramatic appearance, or any final work or accomplishment. It generally carries the connotation that the performer (in this case me) is aware that this is the last performance of his lifetime, and is expending everything in one magnificent final effort….” The above sentence describes my very life circumstances as it is today. For you see, I am no longer the younger man of times past. No, I am much older now, an old man who is no wiser, or smarter than when I started my journey in life. Although, I do know enough to realize that these truly are my last days, and yet, I see myself as a small boy of five. I should not admit such silliness, for it surprises even me to think as a small boy of five at my age. It is said that these are the golden years of my life! I wonder who first said that. For when you get older, you realize that the golden days was our miss spent “days of our youth”. Yes, those were the golden days! The days we thought we owned could treat them as if they would never end. But now, as we return from our journey, we know where we made bad choices. For you see, it is the small boy of five who is pointing out my miss steps where I made the wrong turns. Sadly, such days come to mind too often, reminding me of my failure to listen to those who were returning from their journey on the ‘trail of life’. Oh, the things they would try to tell me. “Watch out for this or that”, they would cry out as I traveled up the trail of life. Beware! Do not forget to make plans for your future! Listen to your conscious, for such comes from the creator of us all, if you believe. I did not listen. And now I have no one to blame but myself. And so now, as I come back, down the life trail of my youth, I find that I must begin anew. Go to college, get a degree, and then find work to support myself during these last days. I really can’t express the mixture of emotional fear and excitement that I find in myself as I am faced with new decisions. Words can’t express the overwhelming sense of loneliness, and knowing that I am alone in this new life of mine. Here I am my last days, no wife, no kids, and no family to offer encouragement or advice. Such is the consequences of making bad choices. It has taken sixty years to get to this theater of life. Now that I am here, all that is left for me to do is sing my Swan Song, as so many before me have down. However, this Swan Song will have to be written to myself. Songs such as this are heard only by oneself. Am I not, one of the older generations, in a sea of young college students? Are they not like me when I was young? I never listened, why should they be any different? And now it is the end of the matter and time to write my Swan Song. I offer my Swan Song to any who may hear it. Not in the spirit of compliant or bitterness but to be viewed as my last performance. But I fear that my last performance will be given to a vacant theater, where none will hear it but the wind. For you see, it is the end of the matter and only the wind understands as it listens to our song.

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