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Sexuality and Culture
성과 문화

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo, Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

우리시대 연애각본

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

자본주의와 결합된 연애의 시대
■ 사랑의 프로그래밍
▶ 대중매체는 사랑에 영향을 주며, 가이드 및 교육자의 역할을 함. ex) 연인들의 기본조건을 개별적으로 프로그래밍하고 적용, 사랑의 시장상황
전달, 섹스와 관련된 주요정보 제공, 사랑의 모델 제시.
▶ 끊임없이 현재의 사랑관 및 행동 모델을 제시하며, 이 모델은 단말적인 변
동성을 지님.

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

자본주의와 결합된 연애의 시대
■ 연애권하는 사회
자본의 소비창출활동에 ‘사랑과 친밀함’이 가장 집중적인 매개가 되고 매우 성
공적 결과를 수행함
 경제는 낭만적 감정을 소비를 통한 사랑의 연출로 종속시킴. 대중매체가 선
전하는 모든 사랑의 규칙과 모델은 특정 형태의 상품 소비를 유도함. 즉, 사랑
의 경제화가 가속화됨.
’dating mate’
▶ dating의 기능
- 결혼동기 제공, 즐거움과 오락의 기능, 사회적 지위성취의 기능,
사회화의 기능

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

자본주의와 결합된 연애의 시대

■ 연애 = 소비
연애=소비 등식성립
- 데이트 과정은 곧 소비의 과정
광고들은 소비 욕구들을 이끌어내는 방법으로 ‘친밀성’활용
- ‘사랑하는 사람’에게 능력을 보여주는 과정 = 연애의 과정
- ‘커플’로서 물건을 구입하고 여가 및 문화생활을 즐기는 과정
= 소비의 과정
- 소비를 주도하는 주체: 능력있는 남성
남성의 구매능력과 소비능력의 행복한 수혜자: 여성

■ 프로젝트화되는 연애
- 글로벌 소비대중문화의 영향
- 연애 공동기획자
HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

자본주의와 결합된 연애의 시대

연애의 상업화
- “혼 활 시 대 ” ; 야마다 마시히로 “취직을 위해 구직활동이 필요하듯
결혼하려면 결혼활동이 필요하다” ; 20-30대 ‘자기계발’에 익숙한 세
대, 다양한 사람을 만나고 사랑을 할 시기인 20대에 취업준비를 위한 스
펙쌓기에 20대를 소진; ‘연애’도 하나의 능력으로 보고 연애강의 환영

▶ 독특한 서비스와 신속성을 제공하는 중매사업 부상함.
- 초고속 데이트
- 가상 데이트
- 오프라인 만남도 점차 전문화됨. ex) 각종 이벤트 혹은 가상의 연인을 대여하는 방식.

▶ 낭만 카운슬링

- 사랑이 개인화되고, 규정과 의무에 따른 구속이 상대적으로 약화됨.
- 현대의 개인은 완벽한 관계를 통해 자신을 규정하고 사랑의 발전을 돕고
자 함. ⇨전문적 카운슬링의 필요성이 증대됨.
HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ 친구와 애인은 어떻게 구별하는가?
■ Davis(1985)

▫ 사랑과 우정은 기본적으로 비슷한 속성을 지니고 있다
우정

사랑
즐거움, 상호호혜, 존중, 신뢰,
이해, 속마음 털어놓기

열정, 돌보는 태도

commitment

■ ’sex friend’ , ‘date friend’ : 성≠사랑
▶ 성의 본질에 대한 시각은 급격한 변화를 겪어옴.
1950년대 : ‘증기기관 이론’이 지배적임.
남성의 욕구는 정기적으로 해결해주어야 하며, 섹스는 결혼의 의무일 뿐임.
1960년대 : 자유연애를 찬양하며 많은 것을 바꾸어놓음.
1970년대 : 여성의 오르가슴이 남성의 욕구 해소와 비슷한 수준의 권리를 갖게 됨.
행복한 관계는 침대에서 이루어지며, 동시 오르가슴이 최고 계명이 됨.
오늘날 : 순수한 욕구로서의 섹스는 개별적으로 사용가능한 자기 정체성이 됨.
욕망과 사랑은 동일시되지 않으며, 어디를 가나 섹스가 존재함.
HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ Dating에 있어 성 각본(Sexual Script)

■ 성 각본
▫ 성적 각성과 반응이 언제, 어떻게, 누구와, 왜, 어디서
나타나야 하는가에 대한 규정
• 누구와 성행위를 할 것인가? (파트너의 연령, 성별, 자기/ 타인 등)
• 어떠한 성행위를 받아들일 수 있는가? (혼자, 반드시 파트너와 함께)
• 파트너와 어느 정도 헌신하는 관계에서 성행위를 할 것인가?
• 언제 성행위를 할 것인가? (성행위의 적절한 연령, 타이밍 등)
• 어디에서 성행위를 하는 것이 적절할 것인가?
• 왜 성행위를 한다고 설명할 것인가?(쾌락/ 자녀 출산)

▫ 문화, 하위문화, 집단, 또는 커플내 규정

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ Dating에 있어 성 각본(Sexual Script)
■ 성적 표준과 실제 성행위는 서로 다르게 나타남
■ 성적 허용도나 경험은 관계의 발전과정과 속도에 영향을 미침
▫ 서로에 대한 선호도와 매력에 영향을 미침
▫ 관계에서의 성 행동에도 영향을 미침
■ 첫경험과 커플관계
▫ 커플들의 관계에 긍정적인 영향을 미치는 중요한 전환점
▫ 책임감을 더 증가시키는 결과를 가져올 수 있음

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ Dating에 있어 성 각본(Sexual Script)
■ 첫 경험

■ 커플의 첫경험에 영향을 미치는 요인(Christopher & Cate, 1985)





긍정적 감정/의사소통 (예, 상대방에 대한 사랑)
각성/감수성 (예, 성 관계 직전의 신체적 각성상태)
의무와 압력 (예, 성 관계를 가지자는 상대방의 압력)
주변의 정황 (예, 술을 마신 정도)

▫ 여성은 긍정적 감정/의사소통 차원이,
남성은 의무/압력이 더 중요

▫ 성적 경험이 없는 경우
감정/의사소통을 특히 중요하게 평가하고,
성적 경험이 많은 대상자들은
각성/감수성 요인을 더 중요하게 평가
HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ Dating에 있어 성 각본(Sexual Script)
■ 혼전 성관계
■ 혼전 성관계의 기준은 역사적으로 절대 금기에서 허용적
으로 변화해왔으나, 이중적 기준은 변하지 않았음
▫ 절대금지: 남녀 모두에게 절대적으로 금지
▫ 애정을 조건으로 한 허용
▫ 애정과 무관한 허용
▫ 이중적 기준: 남자에게는 허용, 여자에게는 금기
남성은 내적욕구와 충동에서 여성과 다르다는
믿음에 근거

■ 사회가 성행위를 통제할 때 가족(결혼)이 큰 역할을 함

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ 친밀한 관계에서 성은 어떻게 거래되는가?
■ 혼인빙자간음죄 헌재 위헌 결정(2009.11.26)
- 형법 제304조: 혼인을 빙자하거나 기타 위계로써 음행의 상습 없는
부녀를 기망하여 간음한 자는 2년 이하의 징역 또는 5백만 원 이하
의 벌금에 처한다.
 ‘순결’, ‘처녀성’의 숭배
 섹스를 교환가능한 자원으로 의미화 하는 여성 존재
■ 사회교환이론 (Social Exchange Theory of Sex)

사회 교환 이론은 수요와 공급의 법칙이 사회 행동을 규정.
 Baumeister, Tice(2000)
 성은 여자가 남자에게 주는 자원이라고 주장.
즉, 남자는 성 관계에 대해 강한 욕망을 가지고 있고,

여자는 남자가 그것을 쟁취할 수 있는 기회를 통제함.
 남자는 성 관계를 위해 여자에게 다른 자원을 제공해야 함.
HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ 사회교환이론 (Social Exchange Theory of Sex)
 여성이 성 관계와 교환하기 원하는 것은 무엇인가?


금전전인 보상, 사회적 위치, 존경, 상위 계층의 사람들과의 교류 등



남성의 헌신
 남자가 여성에게 성 관계에 대한 교환의 의미로 제공할 수 있는

중요한 요소결혼으로 이어짐
(규칙적인 성관계  소유, 주택, 소득 등)
 여성이 성 관계를 통해 포기하는 것은?


여성이 쉽게 자주 성을 제공할 때 마다 그 가치는 하락



여성이 성 관계에 대해 높은 가격을 요구할 수 있는 능력은 한정적임



여성의 성적 매력은 시간적으로도 한정되어 있음
HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ 성적 공간

예식장

결혼  사회적으로 성을 규제하는
중요한 장치; 공식적, 합법적인 성
관계

vs.

러브호텔
성에 대한 사회적 규제를 벗어나는

일종의 해방공간; 사회적으로 인정
받는 성관계를 가질 수 없는 사람
들끼리의 성행위를 갖는 곳

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

Sexuality and Culture

■ 성적 공간
1990년대 도심 외곽의 러브모텔

2000년대 중반 도심의 모텔

섹스의 탈일상화, 초현실화

놀이와 쾌락의 공간,
숙(宿), 식(食), 성(性), 유(遊)가
결합된 공간으로 재구성

“우리의 삶을 어떻게 살아야 하는가,
가족구조와 성규범의 괴리

또 우리가 자신의 육체를 어떻게

가족중심주의적 섹스

즐기고 거절해야 하는지를 둘러싸고

청교도주의의 가치관

끊임없이 변화하는 우리 자신의
관점의 역사”

HANYANG Univ.
Prof. Seo Sun Young

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