As with any academic venture there are times when a student is engulfed in self doubt and is distressed by the inevitability of change. Although these factors present themselves throughout many parts of the educational process, there remains a sense of purpose rooted in the belief of true compatibility. Nestled within this attraction is the opportunity to develop an external character that mirrors the beauty of the internal. It is this congruency in which one is motivated to continue on the journey to become a counselor. Throughout this journey I have been afforded the opportunity to become aware of the strengths and growing edges that I possess. When I consider the time I have spent in the counseling program thus far, I am reminded that in such a short amount of time I have evolved from an individual who was guarded and very much afraid of change and the efforts of social interaction, to a man exhilarated by human interaction and the opportunities provided to further my personal evolution. In order to expand on this idea of growth I will reflect upon my current strengths and weakness, my personal reservations, and current interpersonal factors as they relate to intentional interviewing skills. As a counseling student I often begin to doubt myself, particularly my own relative mental health and emotional stability. I have asked the question, “How can I help someone else, when I’m such a wreck myself?” This is a legitimate question and unfortunately it is too rarely asked by those of us who need to ask it most. There is a lot to think about and work through. My own personal family history, my work life, my loves, my other relationships, my belief system not to mention all of the course work I am trying to absorb can all conspire to make you feel inadequate. At times it seems too complex, too cum¬bersome to sort through, yet there are glimpses of light and clarity that can give me hope and inspiration. Hopefully I will find supervisors, mentors, and guides or counselors of my own to help shoulder this burden. It is also important to remember that this profession does not require me to be a perfect person. I am learning that some of my greatest difficulties and struggles may, in fact, become my greatest assets in understanding the pains and difficulties of others. Counseling is all about the awareness and understanding as well as the sense of humility that you bring to your work, the capacity that you have for seeing yourself with all your strengths and blemishes, that will make it possible for you to work well with others (Gladding, 2002; Jennings, Sovereign, Bottorff, Mussell, & Vye, 2005). As I reflect upon the counseling relationship, I am drawn to the idea of genuine human interaction, an interaction characterized by openness to communication and a general setting free of judgment. It is within this relationship that I will be able to offer the ability in which the universe has gifted me. It’s within this true interaction in which I my true strength reside. Throughout the time I have been provided to learn and study the art of counseling, I have come to the conclusion that attending to people is an area where I posses the most strength. Holding to the belief that humans hold natural capabilities to heal themselves and are by nature perfect in design, has encouraged me to explore the activation of change through the mechanism of congruence and understanding. It is within the aspect of understanding and a generally equal conception of human aptitude in which my true strength lie. Ironically the same area in which I hold strength is also my biggest area of growth. The ability to fully understand others and to hold a congruent stance no matter the circumstance is an ability that I am familiar with but not yet versed. Composed within this area of growth are emotions and behaviors of my past that have proven to impede my ability to effectively communicate on a level outside of my internal thoughts and reactions. The majority of my life I have prized my ability to solely rely on myself in the face of adversity and misfortune. This ability has allowed me to effectively shut out many experiences in which I felt powerless. I am remised at the idea that I strive to interact with others on their level of communication, but find myself bound by internal cha tter. As a person I wish to integrate my two levels of being, in order to grow as a complete congruent counselor capable of providing an interaction with clients that will truly prove to be memorable. As stated above I have lived my life thus far in isolation from others due to the inability to communicate effectively my thoughts and true helping nature, within these notions lie my reservations regarding enacting the intentional interviewing skills. As I contemplate the idea of counseling, the idea that people are putting their trust in my skill as a counselor, enacts a sudden feeling of fear. This fear is not due to some threat of imminent danger, but holds bearings in my lack of confidence in the skill that I currently posses to fulfill the needs of my clients. Possessing the ability to affect lives as counselors do is something I feel is a precious gift, and my current aptitude for in-depth counseling skill comes into question. Keeping this in mind I remind myself that I am not yet a completely competent counselor, and have many more lessons to learn before I am granted the title. In order to overcome my reservations regarding my interpersonal character and conversational skill, I must challenge myself to not only become congruent person but to understand the origins of the incongruence. A continued examination of my current level of interpersonal communication has left me pondering the idea of how this may affect my ability as a counselor in training. Having stated earlier that isolation and incongruence between inner abilities and outer capabilities has hindered my effectiveness when communicating with others, I hope to be able to come to terms with this notion of dissonance. The effective ability to communicate with a client is central to the theme of counseling services, and is what the profession promotes. Having held to this underlined theme of being, I have felt that many of my true feelings and emotions were never expressed due to a lack of trust and a general appreciation for others. In the current circumstance I believe that I have become aware to many of my interpersonal quarrels and have made peace with their existence and what meaning that carries for me. Having come to terms with the awkwardness of the unknown, an internal sense of peace has grown, and the capability of recognizing my growing edges has allowed my evolution to them to a more enlightened individual. A reflective tool such as this paper has allowed me to delve deeper into what becoming an effective counselor really means. It has allowed me to understand a part of myself that I have neglected, a part of me that is an essential part of who I am, but I have shunned due to fear of acceptance. It has been through this process that I have come to the conclusion that although I may possess moments of weakness, it is the manner in which I react to these moments, in which I will be judged and the substance that I take from having them in which I will succeed. Having considered myself in counseling and the strengths in which I possess, I aspire to enrich the lives of others by assisting them to overcome barriers to true happiness.

REFERENCES
Gladding, S. (2002). Becoming a counselor: The light, the bright, and the serious. Alexandria, VA: American Counseling Association.
Jennings, L., Sovereign, A., Bottorff, N., Mussell, M., & Vye, C. (2005). Nine ethical values of master therapists. Journal of Mental Health Counseling, 27(1), 32–47.