How are male and female relationships represented in The perks of being a Wallflower and The great Gatsby?

In both of these books the leading female roles play the damsel in distress, there are a lot of influences on why this happens, all of which become apparent throughout the novels. Beginning with The perks of being a Wallflower, Sam who is the leading female character is dependent on her current boyfriend Craig. Daisy, the lead female character in The Great Gatsby is in a similar situation in which she is besotted with Tom. In both of these novels and in most stories in which male and female relationships are the main focus, the woman tends to pick the man who treats her badly as opposed to the hero.
In The perks of being a Wallflower Sam stays with Craig because she thinks that she is in love with him and that he feels the same, the reality is quite different. Charlie the main male character notices that this is not the case. “He would think that the reason the photograph was beautiful was because of how he took it, I would know the only reason it was beautiful was because of Sam” Charlie does not refer to Craig by his name, he calls him ‘He’ this shows how he dislikes Craig because he doesn’t like to say his name. It also shows the opposites, Charlie is younger than Sam so he is quite innocently viewing the situation and thinking how Craig is treating Sam badly by doing this whereas Craig is older than Sam and more mature, he sees his work as something to be proud of because of how it turned out. Both male characters are completely different. This quote also shows the way in which Craig see’s Sam, he has no interest in her as a person, all he cares about is what’s on the outside. He has a control over Sam which even she knows “you know, I blamed Craig for not letting me do things? Maybe he didn’t encourage me to do things, but he didn’t prevent me from doing them either. But after a while, I didn’t do things because I didn’t want him to think differently about me” This highlights the way that he has control over Sam, she wanted to stay with him even though he brought her down, showing her need for stability. Sam is picking out Craig had made her feel like but she hides it by saying ‘But he didn’t prevent me from doing them either’ this shows Sam’s inability to come to terms with how Craig treated her; it shows that she doesn’t want to get over him. This highlights my point that Sam is dependent on a man throughout the whole book be it Charlie or Craig.
The Great Gatsby presents a similar situation in which Daisy who, although does have an affection for Gatsby, in the end she chooses Tom. She is also dependant on him, she is scared of being alone and of the major change that comes with divorcing her husband. Daisy wants the best of both worlds with both Gatsby and Tom, this is shown when Daisy says “I love you now – Isn’t that enough? I can’t help what’s the past” she began to sob helplessly. “I did love you once – but I loved you too” Like in most novels the female character is always attracted to the bad guy. From this we see that both novels are very alike in that the women are dependent on the wrong man, they would rather be unhappy with stability than something go wrong in what they really want and be alone.
Patriarchy is a main part of male female relationships in that the dominating male character always has control over the female. Daisy pauses twice during this quote, she is thinking carefully about what she is going to say. She knows that Jay will get upset no matter what she says; she tries to ease him into the truth. ‘She began to sob hopelessly’ this shows how Daisy is trying to not get into an argument, she cries because she has realised there is no more waiting around and it is time to choose which man she truly wants.
Also in both of these novels the main male character has more of an obsession with the woman than the other way around, the roles of the characters have been reversed. In The perks of being a Wallflower Charlie is the one who wants Sam the most; he has a fascination with her. This is shown when he says “I am really in love with Sam and it hurts very much” but he does not act on his feelings because he wants her to be happy, he treats her more like a friend because he has respect for her. The language used here is very basic, this highlights Charlie’s immaturity because he is younger than Sam, the love he has for her is a genuine fascination like you would have as a young child. This is also shown here “To tell you the Truth I love Sam; It’s not a movie kind of love either. I just look at her sometimes and think she’s the prettiest and nicest person in the whole world” This novel is set in the late 80’s/early 90’s, there was no means of conversation using a technology such as texting or mobile phones. You had to approach someone if you had any interest in them. Although he doesn’t act upon his feelings he doesn’t hide them, he is openly in love with Sam and she doesn’t realise that she loves him too because of Craig. This links into my first point of women being controlled by the main that has dominance over them.
A similar situation is used in The Great Gatsby where although Jay and Daisy want to be together, Jay is more fascinated by Daisy than the other way around, again in this novel also the roles have been reversed. This fits in well as in the 1920’s when the novel is set women had just gained more power in that they had the right to vote, because of this Daisy is represented as the one who has more power in the relationship. We know that Jay has more of a fascination with Daisy because it is brought up many times in the novel such as when he says “I love her, and that’s the beginning and the end of everything.” He has no other concerns than Daisy; his whole life is based around her. He lives across the bay so that he can be near to her; he throws gigantic parties every weekend but does not attend so that he can look out to see if she’s there. He has an obsession with her. Jay lives and breathes to be with Daisy, he has never tried to move on from his obsession, he is stuck in the past. His feelings are seen by everyone, he does not hide them. Nick, who is a cousin of Daisy’s and also the narrator of the story says “He looked at her the way all women want to be looked at by a man” showing that his love for Daisy is intense even though his eyes. This also shows that lots of other women would be interested in him, he could have any other women but he will not settle for anyone but Daisy, he is focused directly on her.

This leads onto my next point of barriers that prevent the feelings to increase. In both novels Craig and Tom have control over Sam and Daisy which means that they won’t ever leave. In the Great Gatsby Tom has possession over Daisy despite him having another woman and not actually loving Daisy, he doesn’t want to admit defeat to another man because he had a lot of pride. Everyone else can see that they are not happy. Nick points out that “Daisy and Tom were sitting opposite each other at the kitchen table… they weren’t happy … yet they weren’t unhappy either. This was an unmistakeable air of natural intimacy about the picture, and anybody would have said they were conspiring together” This shows that it is obvious they do not want to be together, neither of them are happy. Tom wants to be with his woman on the side and Daisy wants to be with Jay but neither of them will admit it, they only go away in secret so that they can come back to their normal life. The fact that they are sat opposite each other shows there separation, they are very distant from one another. They sit away because they can’t be near each other, it shows there unhappiness. The second quote to prove this is “it’s totally okay for Tom to have his little affairs, because he really loves Daisy. Yeah, we’re sure that excuse works for her. “This shows that Daisy won’t leave because of Tom, she thinks that there is some hope that things might work out for them both, by making up reasons in her head she is able to calm herself. The fact she has to even make excuses shows how many cracks there are between the couple.
Also in The perks of being a Wallflower there barriers preventing them being together also. Charlie wants Sam, but she won’t leave Craig because he also has possession over her despite him treating her badly. Charlie notices this “I want Sam to stop liking Craig. Now I guess maybe you think that’s because I am jealous of him. I am not. Honest. It’s just that Craig doesn’t really listen to her when she talks. I don’t mean he’s a bad guy because he’s not. It’s just he always looks distracted “this shows that Craig does not want to be with Sam, he’s not interested in her. Until Craig and Sam split up she does not realise her feelings for Charlie because she is going for the wrong guy. This is preventing them being together. Charlie does have a fling with a girl called Mary Elizabeth, this is near the time when Sam and Craig split up so this is another factor that prevents them being together because as Sam is starting to realise, and Charlie knows she is realising he is stuck in a situation with Mary Elizabeth. Sam also says “I know that you know I like Craig. And I know that I told you not to think of me in that way. And I know we can’t be together like that. But I want you to forget all of those things for a moment” Sam tries to cover her feelings by saying that she likes Craig, showing she wants to be with the wrong person. There is always something happening which stops them becoming a couple.