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Somewhere Between Wishful and Blunt.

In: English and Literature

Submitted By dennise08
Words 406
Pages 2
Maybe I could change bad people’s hearts.

I was always the type to search for the purest fragment of humanity within everyone I deemed worthy of compassion, even if I knew deep down inside that they were quite unworthy at the core of their being. In my heart, I always felt that every human being deserves some kind of chance in this world, some semblance of patience, kindness and optimism. It seems that people are far too quick to shut the door on someone they hardly know based on what they think they’ve seen. However, I always found myself staring long and hard into a stranger’s eyes, as if searching unconsciously for traces of their good deeds.

Maybe if I could help just one person…

I was not the type of person to open myself up, despite the way that I reached out to others in need. Although I wanted them to open up themselves to possibility, I honestly never allowed my own heart to venture the same paths I provided to others. For all the times that I tried to save countless lost souls in this world, I never even considered that my own might require some measure of saving. Self-sacrifice can become all-absorbing, even with little or no effort put forth consciously. Subconsciously, I believe that I was doing for others what I was unable to do for myself.

…They might help someone else in return.

I have always believed that a favor given, whether in honesty or obligation, automatically meant a favor returned. However, it took me many years to realize that although you can be forthcoming and honest with others, it doesn’t necessarily mean they will return the sentiment. Perhaps I simply resided in the gap between the wishful thinking of my childhood and the blunt honesty of my adulthood. Whatever the case, it lead to many a sleepless nights, tossing and turning over ulterior motives and their destructive qualities. I suppose in some ways, I realized

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