“Do not be concerned about the future; keep your attention on today, and stay in the present moment. Just live one day at a time. Always do your best to keep these agreements, and soon it will be easy for you. Today is the beginning of a new dream.” This statement by Don Miguel Ruiz is probably one of my new favorite quotes. Mainly because it is relatable to everyone.
The Four Agreements is a guide for those who are seeking a development in their personal life. The book was written by, Don Miguel Ruiz, and he got his ideas from the ancient Toltec wisdom of the Natives of Southern Mexico. The Toltec people were known to be very knowledgeable artists and scientist. They made a society to explore and conserve the traditional spiritual knowledge and practices of their ancestors.
Don Miguel Ruiz was brought up in rural Mexico. He was expected to follow his Toltec ways by his mother who was a Toltec faith healer, and grandfather who was a Toltec ‘nagual’, a shaman. Despite this, Don Miguel decided to pursue an orthodox education, which allowed him to be authorized to practice for several years as a surgeon. He first studied the Toltec ways in profundity, and then healing, teaching, lecturing and writing during the following two decades. It was then in 1997 when he published The Four Agreements. (Miguel Ruiz) The Four Agreements: Be impeccable with your word: Speak with Integrity and say only what you mean, and mean what you say and be responsible for your actions. Try not to use the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about anyone. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. (Raam) “The word is so powerful that one word can change a life or destroy the lives of millions of people.” Don Miguel used an example of Hitler and how he tricked a whole nation into supporting his sick goal. Don’t take anything personally: Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are not affected by the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. (Raam) “Taking things personally makes you easy prey for these predators, the black magicians. They can hook you easily with one little opinion and feed you whatever poison they want, and because you take it personally, you eat it up.” This quote by Don Miguel really resonates in my mind that we can’t allow opinions of others to get us down.
Don’t make assumptions: Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With this one agreement, you can change your life drastically. (Raam) “We make all sorts of assumptions because we don't have the courage to ask questions. These assumptions are made so fast and unconsciously most of the time because we have agreements to communicate this way.” In this quote by Don Miguel, it definitely relates to this generation because in today’s world, not enough questions are being asked. We don’t ask enough, we come up with our own assumptions all day long but not once ask what really happen because what’s in our thoughts seems better to us. Relationship go through hell every day because someone did not make things clear with their partner.
Always do your best: Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstances, simply do your best and you will avoid self -judgment, self-abuse and regrets. (Raam)
What do the Four Agreements mean to me? To be impeccable with my word is to be true to what you believe in and mean it. This is one of the most difficult agreements to follow but it is the one that shows incredible results when achieved. I can fail to accomplish the first agreement, but with what I’ve learned I must leave the past in the past and direct my focus towards the present. With my words, I believe I have two choices. I can either have a similar power to instill peace among my followers like Gandhi or manipulate a multitude of people like Hitler. It isn’t right in my heart to be impeccable with my word by speaking with Honor if everything I’m saying is creating pain to others or me. Honoring the agreement to ‘Be Impeccable with Your Word’ can give me that moment to ask myself if what I’m about to say will be healing or harmful.
To not take anything personally could possibly be the answer to love and peace. If I try my best to live the first agreement, then I should not let myself feel pain or spiteful emotions when someone shares their opinions with actions. This is very difficult to do however because words hurt. This agreement especially requires practice, patience and discipline. This type of agreement can be thought of as a type of repellent to bullying in society. If we can practice this valuable agreement to not take anything personal, malicious people would lose the fuel for their actions since their results would be ineffective and unexpected. If I can master this agreement I can gain confidence and love for myself when placing this agreement in action every day.
Refraining from making assumption can make things less confusing, drama free, and less depressing. When learning the third agreement, I found myself asking more questions and life becoming simpler. Things became clearer and easier to understand applying this agreement to my life. We have this habit of making assumptions about people and things around us. We do it in our relationships, our job, at school, with our children, and even with strangers who we have never met. Some may as well call it judging. When make assumptions, we fantasize in our mind what is about to happen mainly because of how we view others. Making assumptions is creating false reality. It’s a waste of life when we do this. It’s a better use of our time and energy when we avoid making assumptions and we simply focus on what’s fact and true.
Always do your best, the fourth agreement. In my opinion, this may be the easiest agreement of all. We were told this all the time by our parents, teachers, and coaches growing up to do our best. If you apply yourself to do the best you can, then you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
Psychology is the study of the human mind and behaviors. This includes the study of human development, sports, health, clinical, and social behavior. (McLeod) “The Four Agreements” can be applied to all of these. This book gives principles to create love and happiness in your life by figuring out why we make assumptions, why we take thing personally, why we should do our best, and why we should be impeccable with our word. In the book you learn that having freedom still doesn’t mean you are free. The message in the book is trying to encourage your freedom from fear and illusions. This book can help people with depression and helping psychologist with their research. “The Four Agreements” is all about encouraging the reader and drastically changing their life in a positive way. Psychologist can use the information used in this book to further help their patients in extraordinary ways.
“The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz, is a book for encouragement and is definitely a book I would recommend to someone feeling down and also a good read to better my life in many ways.