...A Marriage of Circumstance Pride and Prejudice illustrates the search of women in the 1700’s for a husband. The social customs of the time, such as the economic value of marriage, and the need for a woman to have a man to take care of her, are represented through the many marriages in Pride and Prejudice. The marriage of Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy represents one of true love, honesty, and respect. Charlotte Lucas’s marriage to Mr. Collins, however, exemplifies a marriage of circumstance. Lydia Bennet’s marriage to Mr. Wickham is forced, consisting on one side of misguided love and on the other of economic necessity. Elizabeth Bennet is established as a woman who will not marry out of solely economic necessity. She turns down Mr. Collins’ marriage proposal despite the fact that he is a man of means with a good social standing. Elizabeth then refuses a proposal of marriage from Mr. Dary. Darcy had not courted or won Elizabeths love before the time of his proposal, and in fact had been rude to Elizabeth up until that point. Darcy’s proposal consists of him simultaneously professing his love to her and apologizing for his...
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...1). Do you think Alix Kates Shulman's marriage agreement is a good idea--why or why not? What do you agree with and what do you disagree with? How does she claim it saved her marriage and her career? I think the marriage agreement idea is good because it does give a good structure to avoid complications. If you lay it all out and find balance things can be better understood organized, and respected. No one has to feel like a stay at home parent who doesn’t get to live their life and there isn’t any sexism, it provides equality in a marriage. I think it’s a great idea to even everything out between husband and wife so that one person isn’t put at a disadvantage in life. I agree that the contract can be helpful as Shulman showed it was in her marriage. However, I think it’s in some ways to strict and unnatural. It would be annoying to have to write in a log and live by specific dates and times and do everything on a specific schedule every day. Schulman states that her marriage was saved as both she and her husband felt happier. They could spend more time together and with children and had balanced responsibilities. She no longer had the feeling that a lot of responsibility and household work was being put on her as her dreams were put aside. The agreement have her extra time to handle her personal affairs and dreams and this helped her career. She was able to achieve the things she wanted. She became a writer and published her own books. 2). In Hope Edelman's essay, how...
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...important to understand what we mean when we say Christ centred. We don’t just mean that you say you believe in Jesus claims or that you attend church regularly. When we understand this word centred it will define our understanding of Christ centred living. We understand what makes up our solar system by what revolves around the sun in the solar system. Similarly a Christ centred life can be identified by how everything about it revolves around Christ. When we strive for that kind of life it becomes one which is dripping with purpose. God not only breathes life into our spirit when we come to Him, he offers to breathe a living purpose into every aspect of us and our life. Today we want to understand how he does that to our relationships. We will be looking at 3 books in scripture to understand this concept and will be looking at 3 areas of relationships for a believer in Christ. 1. Relationships at home: Genesis 2:18-24 Now I realise a lot of you are not married but I also know that most of you have the desire to be married. We want to understand it means to be Christ centred in marriage as well. I have spoken on this topic before and so if you’re hearing it for the 2nd time maybe God really wants to get a point across to you. If we look at the story of creation we see how God creates everything and at the end He creates Adam. Scripture goes on to say that for every living thing a partner was found but for Adam there was none. In verse 18 Genesis teaches us that God...
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...rate of marriages(Weitzman,1985). Here in the United States fifty percent of marriages and for end in divorce, and even more startling is the rate of divorce is equal between those in the church and in the world. As the body of Christ we have responsibility to set the proper example for the world, the world should follow our example and it should not be the opposite. Somewhere along the lines we mishandled marriage and God’s idea for family and many have gone astray. It’s seemingly as if the value of marriage and commitment has become insignificant regardless if one is a believer or not. When we begin to examine reasons why individuals divorce it may range from stress, financial reasons and infidelity etc. The challenge with divorce is that it not only impacts the adults that are involved but when children are involved they become the ones who suffer. Most children of divorce will experience it at the least as a potent transient stress that disrupts virtually all aspects of their lives (Weitzman, Adair 1988). This topic is worth discussing because marriages works I personally believe can be saved with early intervention, proper counseling and spiritual guidance. I believe it is God’s heart to keep the family together and I believe the same amount of effort that is put into divorcing the person to whom you took a vow before God to be with through sickness and health. That level of effort should be put into restoring the marriage and getting to a safe place where God can heal...
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...In both texts there is a strong sense of religion which emphasises the importance and imperative nature of marriage. Although two different religions, they both follow the strict rule of no sex before marriage, otherwise the women are seen as impure. Despite having a “husband” in the novel, Tess is never actually married to him in the fullest sense of marriage that Hardy proposes. This is on a parallel to A Thousand Splendid Suns where both Mariam and Laila are married to Rasheed in a physical, lawful sense but are not emotionally and internally married and are in fact very distant from him. Marriage causes the protagonists to be entrapped. In A Thousand Splendid suns, Mariam and Laila are trapped inside the house with Rasheed, due to the Taliban imposing the rule on women to “stay inside your homes at all times” unless “accompanied by a mahram, a male relative”. But not only are they physically trapped, they are also mentally trapped in a cycle of submissiveness to Rasheed and fear of his actions. Rasheed is just as guilty as the Taliban as even before the Taliban came into power and exercised these rules, living with Rasheed was like living in a prison for Mariam and Laila through the power he exerted over them “Rasheed didn't say anything. And, really, what could be said, what needed saying when you'd shoved the barrel of your gun into your wife's mouth?” Rasheed holds a frightening amount of power over the two protagonists which is often achieved through violence. They...
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...it would in person. I absolutely hate discussing religion (with someone of another faith, or without faith) and politics. Both normally lead to frustrated feelings from both sides because one couldn’t convince the other to his view. Of course throughout class it is obvious I have a Christian world view, and it is difficult to comprehend those around me (in my culture) may not have the same world view. I believe the only way to Heaven is to be saved by professing Jesus as our Savior, and asking for forgiveness of our sins. We are spiritually born again into a new life with God and His teachings as our guide, and also for our reason to live. God renews our faith, cleanses us of our wickedness, and refreshes our soul. Then we are also baptized, a symbolic way of washing away our sins and through the grace and mercy of Jesus our slate is wiped clean. One aspect of Christianity that non-Christians can’t seem to understand is that clean slate may get a little soiled now and again. But when you have faith that Jesus has saved you and will forgive you, there’s a real comfort that is called hope. We aren’t perfect and we know it. If we had to be perfect I suspect Jesus would be lonely in Heaven! We would also have no hope of eternal life with him, and I can’t think of anything else that could be worse. One of the most chilling quotes is from Dante’s Inferno, “Abandon hope, all ye who enter here.” It is unfathomable for me to imagine a life without hope. Until the last...
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...financial issues, lack of equality in the relationship, lack of preparation for marriage, and abuse. Some of these problems can be fixed and divorce prevented. These days so many marriages end in divorce, and divorce becomes the norm than ever before. As we known, divorce is the termination of a marital union, the canceling of the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage between married couples. A Lot of people would think carefully before they get married. Most married couples are able to maintain their relationship while others do not, which leads to divorce. Why does the divorce’s rate trend to continually increase lately? Even though each broken marriage is unique, we can still find the common causes for marital despair. Causes of Divorce Infidelity is the number one reason why marriage ends up in divorce. Most men are more likely to engage in extramarital sex if they are unsatisfied sexually, leading to internet porn and chat rooms. And as for Women, we are most likely to engage in extramarital sex if they are unsatisfied emotionally. Second cause of divorce is Spousal abuse, either the subject of physical and emotional abuse in marriage is difficult to address because spouses cannot usually agree as to what it is. Physical abuse is easier to define than emotional abuse because there are bruises to prove it. But even a spouse who seriously injures or even kills the other spouse during a fight can justify his or her behavior as self-defense, not abuse. And the courts often...
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...sometimes, life ends up differently for them. Sometimes it's just the thorns they feel. Lots of couples argue and fight over little things. Many wonder whether all the fighting is worth keeping their marriage together or even normal. Is there hope for their marriage? Divorce has become very common. Usually it's just because marriage has become a task. One researcher says, "Compared to years ago, people today pay less value on obligation to other, on sacrifice, and on self-restraint. We place more value on individualism, on self-expression and self-realization, and on personal choice" (Galston 4). These changes occurred because people's principles have changed. We are more accepting of divorce today than we were years ago. Gray believes that many marriages in trouble can be saved and a successful marriage all depends on the husband and wife working together. He also says that sometimes love is easy and other times it needs effort. We shouldn't expect to always be loving and we need to be understanding when we don't know how to be loving (285-286). Couples need to be provided with the tools they need to keep their relationship strong. I think there are three ways we can prevent or lessen our chances of divorce. The first step occurs before marriage, the second during marriage, and the third at the beginning of divorce. Statistics and Facts It's pretty obvious that the divorce rate is very high and continuing to grow. According to "The Divorce Center", "In 1998 2.2 million...
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...If a holy man can proclaim love in public can he proclaim love in secret? Friar Laurence is like a father to Romeo. He has always been there for Romeo and has helped him through challenges in life. Friar Laurence helps many people, but only if they are truthful and have good outcomes. Now he is challenged with some of the most difficult decisions to make. Whether he will help his friends no matter the outcomes. The Montagues and the Capulets have been in a feud for many generations. Romeo (a Montague) states that he is in love with a Capulet and wants Friar to marry them. Friar Laurence does not believe that it will have good results. Though, the Friar does finally agree to marry him and Juliet. He sees that this marriage could end the feud...
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...blame their failing marriages on lack of communication between them and their partner. An example Tannen shared was a couple at a small gathering. The husband described his wife as the talker of the family. The group laughed, however, the man insisted he was serious and that if his wife did not talk when he got home from work that he would spend the rest of the evening in silence. Tannen explained that the lack of communication is due to the difference in the way men and women view personal relationships. Women verbalize their emotions and thoughts. Whereas men are more likely to use their actions. From childhood females form close bonds with other through sharing secrets and discussing their feelings. Women want their spouse to be their best friends. Therefore they want to be able to talk to their husbands the same way they do their female friends. Males form friendships not by talking but by doing things together. Males do not miss the talking because it was never there to establish the bond. Also male groups are larger and based on hierarchy. Males do not want to feel like the subordinate. When women talk to them they may feel like they are being talked down to. Tannen believes that marriages that are dissolved based on lack of communication can be saved if people understood the difference between male and female communication. Both parties would be able to identify the things that make the other mad. Identifying the problem can lead the couple to...
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...Anthropology: Marriage and Divorce I do have to say that I may not have personal experience with marriage but I do know what the bible has to say about it, and that is ultimately what matters. The modern view on marriage tends to be that of lesser importance. If it does not work, then no big deal because there is always the option of divorce. This view usually has the effect of not taking holy matrimony seriously because there is a backup plan. When things go wrong couples are just giving up. God never said marriage would be easy, but He is there to help us every step of the way. Marriage is between one man and one woman for life, and there is only one reason that a couple should ever get a divorce, according to the bible. The bible gives us the guidelines for marriage and how it is supposed to look and work. Almost all marriages had to have the parent’s approval, and were more a matter of convenience rather than for love during bible times. (Elwell 741) Girls were usually between the age of twelve and seventeen; while boys were between fourteen and eighteen. (Elwell 741) The husband was responsible for providing for his family, and the wife was responsible for having child and talking care of them and the house. According to Elwell, matriarchal marriage occurred when a man went to live with and became part of his wife’s family. (740) Also, a “‘Betrothal’ was a legally binding contract between the parents of the bride and groom. It had the legal status of marriage…” (Elwell...
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...Carmen Ramirez Dr. Lee English 1302- 7:30 am August 5, 2014 The Smallest Things Can Make A Difference I have chosen to study “Post-Its (Notes on Marriage)” by Winnie Holzman and Paul Dooley. This is a short drama in which a man and a woman go through some ups and downs in their relationship and it is being told by the post-it notes they left for each other. I believe this piece of literature is important because it shows the little details in a person’s life and how they add up together. It is a great example in how such few little details can add up to how much you love someone. I have chosen this because I enjoy drama, character development, and it’s ending. This is a drama that may seem “basic” but it holds so much depth in it when it is given complete attention. This text is also extremely relatable because the characters are referred to as “man” and “woman”. Therefore, it can be anyone, which allows the text to become more personal to the audience. This drama starts off with a cute and comedic banter between a man and a woman. As they both enter the room and approach the table, the man notices that the woman does not sit down because she is waiting for him to pull out her chair, so he does. After she is seated, the man stands and waits by his chair. The woman realizes what he wants and after a while goes to seats him as he did her. After this, the man reads the first post-it., “Had an early meeting, couldn’t bear to wake you. Close front door hard or it won’t lock...
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...dominated by males and caused 100,000 abandoned girls in China every year. About a quarter of all adoptions are from China and they mostly all girls due to the extreme desires of having a son. Many of the families can not afford to pay fines to have multiple children so they just get rid of the female babies allowing them to try again for a male. Husbands will sometimes even send his wife away if his first born isn't a male, disposing of his wife as if she is useless and to blame for not producing a male. As the primary decision maker of the family, men hold all the power and that is why China is a patriarch...
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...Compare and Contrast Essay: “Story of an Hour” and “To My Dear and Loving Husband” Thesis: In the short story, “Story of an Hour” by Mary Chopin and the poem “To my Dear and Loving Husband”, by Anne Bradstreet both authors reveal how each of their female characters feel about their husband and how each feelings are expressed differently I. Both women are treated differently by their husbands. A. In the “Story of an Hour”, the central character, Louise Mallard, feels locked in her marriage. B. In “To My Dear and Loving Husband”, the author Anne feels safe and secure in her marriage. II. Both women express different feelings about their mates. A. In “Story of an Hour”, Louise feels that it is not enough that her husband loves her. B. In “To My Dear and Loving Husband”, Anne values her relationship with her husband more than anything. III. Both authors use literary concepts to make their writings easier to understand. A. In “Story of an Hour”, the line free, free, free tells us that Louise feels free after learning of her husband’s death. B. In “To My Dear and Loving Husband”, the line I prize thy love more than mines of gold tells us that she values their love very much. A WOMAN’S LOVE FOR A MAN As every woman is an individual with distinct characteristics so too will her feelings towards her husband are uniquely expressed. There are husbands who try to control their wives so much that the woman cannot freely follow does their own will. Then there are...
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...cell phone communication only phone Booth & Home Telephone. Mrs.de los Reyes stated, “I knew I had no time for isolation or feeling sad I told myself Stephanie appreciate what you have family a healthy child & food on the table roof over your head.” She knew with God's grace my family would be covered. When her baby Amanda was few days days old I learned by watching the Channel 7 President Senior Bush told the world the Uss Tripoli my husband's ship was going to Somalia. NO cellular communication from my husband for 4 months. She communicated via a multitude of letters to her husband during this time. This types of situation isn’t uncommon Allison Perkins from The Huffington Post states, “While common marriage advice holds that a person should place his or her marriage above all else, military spouses often don’t. Living with this reality often requires a lot of patience” this is proven with my father and mother during their first kid. Not only is there an emotional strain on the relationship but there is also a financial struggle when there's only one source of income. Since my mother was on such a small budget she used the San Diego Navy Base to buy Pampers, Food, Formula, and the all necessary items for the month. It helped since they paid no taxes and it cost less than civilian markets at that time it was so cheap you could only go once a month. You used a punch card to go to the market that's how they kept you from going to the market more than once a month. They...
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