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Noble

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1. एक आदमी पेपर पढ़ रहा था जब उसकी बीवी ने उसके सिर पर जोर से फ्राईंग पैन दे मारा!

"यह किस लिए मारा", उस आदमी ने पूछा?

बीवी ने जवाब दिया,"आज तुम्हारी पैंट की जेब से एक कागज का टूकड़ा मिला उस पर 'जेन्नी' लिखा हुआ था इसलिए।"

"अरे पिछले हफ्ते मैं रेस कोर्स गया था और जिस घोड़ी पर मैंने पैसे लगाए थे उसका नाम 'जेन्नी' था", आदमी ने सफाई दी।

उसकी बीवी ने उससे माफी मांगी और वह अपना काम करने रसोई के अंदर चली गई।

तीन दिन बाद वह आदमी घर में टी.वी. देख रहा था जब उसकी बीवी ने और एक बड़े फ्राईंग पैन से उसके सिर पर इतने जोर से की वह बेहोश ही हो गया।

जब उस आदमी को होश आया उसने पूछा,"अब यह किस लिए मारा?"

"आज दिन में तुम्हारी घोड़ी का फोन आया था तुम्हारे बारे में पूछ रही था इसलिए", उसकी बीवी ने जवाब दिया।
2. एक बैंक बिल्कुल जेल के सामने था एक दिन बैंक के सेफ का लॉक नही खुल रहा था बैंक वालों ने हर तरह कोशिश की मैकनिक बुलाये पर फिर भी वे सेफ का लॉक नही खोल पाए।

तब बैंक मैनेजर ने जेल में जाकर कैदियों से मदद मांगी एक कैदी सेफ का लॉक खोलने के लिए तैयार हो गया।

उसे पुलिस सुरक्षा में बाहर लाया गया और उसने थोड़ी ही देर में बिना किसी तोड़फोड़ के सेफ खोल दिया।

बैंक मैनेजर उसके उस कारनामे से बहुत खुश हुआ।

मैनेजर ने सेफ खोलने वाले कैदी से कहा, "मैं आपसे बहुत खुश हूँ, आपने बिना किसी क्षति के सेफ खोल दिया आप बताईये की इस काम के लिए हम आपको कितने रूपए दें।"

सेफ खोलने वाले कैदी ने कहा, "पिछली बार तो जब मैंने ऐसा ही एक सेफ खोला था तो मुझे 10 लाख रूपए मिले थे तभी तो मैं यहाँ हूँ।
3. एक बार एक शतरंज का ग्रैंडमास्टर संता और बंता से बोला, चलो यार शतरंज खेलते हैं।

संता: नहीं, आप तो हमें आसानी से हरा दोगे।
ग्रैंडमास्टर: अछा चलो, तुम दोनों और मैं अकेला।
बंता: फिर भी हम हार जाएंगे।
ग्रैंडमास्टर: ठीक है, चलो मैं बाएं हाथ से खेलूंगा।

संता-बंता: हां फिर ठीक है।

ग्रैंडमास्टर संता-बंता को हरा कर चला जाता है।

संता: बड़ी शर्मनाक बात है यार, उसने हमें उल्टे हाथ से भी हरा दिया।

बंता: अबे, वो हमें बेवकूफ बना गया।

संता: कैसे?

बंता: वो लेफ्टी ही होगा।
4. मुर्गियों के फार्म में एक बार निरीक्षण के लिए इंस्पेक्टर आया।

इंस्पेक्टर: तुम मुर्गियों को क्या खिलाते हो?

पहला मालिक: बाजरा।

इंस्पेक्टर: खराब खाना, इसे गिरफ्तार कर लो।

दूसरा: चावल।

इंस्पेक्टर: गलत खाना, इसे भी गिरफ्तार कर लो।

अब संता की बारी आई।

संता डरते-डरते बोला, "हम तो जी मुर्गियों को 5-5 रुपए दे देते हैं कि जो तुम्हारी मर्जी है जाकर खा लो।"
5.

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