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The Effects of a Violent Father

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Submitted By twoozley
Words 2287
Pages 10
Growing up, I balanced myself between love and fear for a man I was supposed to idealize. It’s a very thin tightrope for a small girl, one that leaves a voice in the back of your head warning you to watch your step and keep your distance. There are many effects from walking such a tightrope. There are trust issues, anger issues, and deeply imbedded fear to overcome while balancing against the effects of a violent father.
I am six years old. I play quietly with my toys in the corner of the room. I could play alone with my toys for hours. I make up stories, characters, and worlds for my dolls, my stuffed animals, and my Fisher-Price Little People. I hear the yelling in the background, but if I concentrate hard enough I can almost drown it out. Almost. I hear my sister’s back talk and I sense it isn’t good, but I keep playing in my corner. My father doesn’t like a smart mouth. He’s had too much to drink again, his temper is raging again, and his fists are demanding respect that he isn’t receiving…again. She’s asking for it; she’s sassy, she’s questioning, she’s complaining, and she’s not his real daughter. My brother tries to intervene; he’s always trying to protect her. He’s athletic, he’s valiant, he’s brave, but he’s not his real son. He’s pushing it today. I can’t ignore them any longer. Like a moth to a flame, I’m drawn in for a closer look. It’s like a horrible TV show that I can’t turn off. My sister is sobbing in the hallway. My brother is pinned against the wall with his feet off the ground. I have to look really closely now because I don’t understand how he’s being suspended eye to eye with my father. My father’s hands are around my brother’s neck. My brother’s eyes are bulging, his face is turning a dark shade of red, and his legs are flailing. I don’t understand. I look around, but I don’t know what to do. I feel something warm running down my legs, but

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