Premium Essay

Abuse or Discipline

In:

Submitted By jdelrio
Words 334
Pages 2
Abuse or discipline

Spanking is such a difficult topic to discuss. The love of a child is such that their pain is your pain. In our home it’s very clear that spanking is a last resort. Typically we use other techniques like taking away privileges and very detailed explanations of the situation and the correct way to do things next time. Then we ask our son the very next day about what he learned from this. In the beginning he was lost but after a while he caught on and was able to really put into words the lesson learned.

Bringing it up again in conversation really drives home the point of how serious the situation was to you and reminds them of the correct action while they are in a mindset that is not as full of emotion as compared to being in the heat of the moment. Just make sure you do not do this at the dinner table. No one wants to eat while being reprimanded.

In those few situations where my son’s actions are deliberate disobedience or ill intention, then we start to use the threat of spanking. The problem with the threat of spanking is that a threat is a form of promise. Eventually you must deliver on your word. We only issue the warning on two occasions. If there is a need for a third, then it is time to deliver the spanking.

What happens afterwards is equally as important as what happens before and during the spanking. There must be more explaining and there must be a call to action. The child must be told what is expected and also shown that they are and will always be loved and wanted. There must always be an explanation of how the child’s choices can play out in the future, if this does not stop or change. Their eyes and ears must always be filled with love and the fact that these steps are taken to better

Similar Documents

Free Essay

Spanking: Discipline or Abuse?

...John Clay English 101 Mrs. Cannon 25 April 2012 Spanking: Discipline or Abuse? Spanking a child, in contemporary times, is often viewed in a negative light. Many people consider it child abuse and unnecessary. In some situations with some children however, it can be an effective form of discipline. For some problematic children, it may be the only effective option. “The problems some kids who are spanked have in later life might have to do more with their personalities--the behaviors that got them spanked in the first place--than with the punishment (Paul). Parents should be able to discipline their children as they see fit as long as they are not abusing them. Parents are allowed to spank their children in the state of Missouri. Missouri State Law provides the following as to what is abuse: “ (1) "Abuse", any physical injury, sexual abuse, or emotional abuse inflicted on a child other than by accidental means…, except that discipline including spanking, administered in a reasonable manner, shall not be construed to be abuse” (Mo. Gen. Assembly RSMO 210.110). RSMO 160 Section 10, pertaining to corporeal punishment in schools, concurs stating: “Spanking, when administered by certificated personnel … in a reasonable manner..., is not abuse within the meaning of chapter 210” (Mo. Gen. Assembly). These statutes are vague however, in defining how to spank your child in a reasonable manner. In a recent interview, Greene County Prosecutor Dan Patterson shed some light on the matter...

Words: 1827 - Pages: 8

Premium Essay

Child Abuse vs Discipline

...Child abuse versus Discipline Abstract This paper will identify the difference between abuse and discipline. The effective ways to teach our children and the negative ways in which people think discipline can be tied into abuse. The thin line between abuse and discipline and how some people may think it is justified. Child abuse versus Discipline What is child abuse? Under the federal law any recent act or failure to act on the part of a parent or caretaker which results in death, serious physical, or emotional harm, sexual abuse, or exploitation; or an act or failure to act which presents an imminent risk of serious harm(New World Encyclopedia 2012) . The abuse of children is more than just broken bones even though physical abuse is a concern you also have different types of abuse. There is Neglect, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, and physical and they differ from discipline. Discipline is the training that a parent or guardian gives a child so that he or she can act or react to a situation in life in a specific way (education 2012). It builds character in the child and shows them the way they should carry themselves when in society. Training children mental improvement and morally is another way discipline helps keeps in good way. Using physical tactics for example beating, spankings, punches and slaps are common things people think of when you say discipline in a physical way however, if the child doesn’t learn a lesson then it isn’t discipline. If you do not sit...

Words: 2680 - Pages: 11

Free Essay

When Does Discipline Cross the Line to Child Abuse?

...When Does Discipline Cross the Line to Child Abuse? In this report, I concentrated my research on the fine line between physical discipline and child abuse, with emphasis on spanking vs. not spanking and its effects on children. Included are research from statistics, opposing views and arguments, advocates’ and Department of Children and Families’ position. The use of corporal punishment, or spanking, as a form of parental discipline is a controversial topic. Adults who remember being spanking by a parent for misbehaving may carry on this behavior as an acceptable form of punishment for their own children. Others believe spanking to be an outdated punishment that is cruel and can cross the line to physical abuse. 2010 NATIONAL ABUSE STATISTICS NATIONAL ABUSE STATISTICS - - (www.nationalchildrensalliance.org) nearly five children die every day in America from abuse and neglect. In 2010, an estimated 1,560 children died from abuse and neglect in the United States. Nearly 80% of reported child fatalities as a result of abuse and neglect were caused by one or more of the child victim's parents. Children Welfare League of America (www.cwla.org) In 2010, Connecticut had 45,313 total referrals for child abuse and neglect. Of those, 25,777 reports were referred for investigation and in 2010, 4 children in Connecticut died as a result of...

Words: 1486 - Pages: 6

Premium Essay

Child Abuse

...Child abuse versus Discipline CJ 210 October 1, 2012 Abstract This paper will identify the difference between abuse and discipline. The effective ways to teach our children and the negative ways in which people think discipline can be tied into abuse. The thin line between abuse and discipline and how some people may think it is justified. Child abuse versus Discipline What is child abuse? Under the federal law any recent act or failure to act on the part of a parent or caretaker which results in death, serious physical, or emotional harm, sexual abuse, or exploitation; or an act or failure to act which presents an imminent risk of serious harm(New World Encyclopedia 2012) . The abuse of children is more than just broken bones even though physical abuse is a concern you also have different types of abuse. There is Neglect, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, and physical and they differ from discipline. Discipline is the training that a parent or guardian gives a child so that he or she can act or react to a situation in life in a specific way (education 2012). It builds character in the child and shows them the way they should carry themselves when in society. Training children mental improvement and morally is another way discipline helps keeps in good way. Using physical tactics for example beating, spankings, punches and slaps are common things people think of when you say discipline in a physical way however, if the child doesn’t learn a lesson then it isn’t discipline...

Words: 2685 - Pages: 11

Premium Essay

Assess the Effectiveness of the Legal Rights and Obligations by Parents and Children Regarding Discipline.

...law of obligations is one branch of private law under the civil law legal system. It is the body of rules that organises and regulates the rights and duties arising between individuals. Both parents and children have rights and obligations regarding the idea of discipline, and in Australia it is effective, however, only to a certain extent. Notions of justice regarding fairness, equality, access, timeliness, enforceability and resource efficiency need to be addressed when considering these rights and obligations of parents and children regarding discipline. Discipline in the form of smacking in more recent years has become a fairly controversial topic. It is debatable in the sense that new concepts have been raised in that smacking may have long and short-term psychological effects on the child. However, it is also known that there is a clear difference between smacking and child abuse, and in terms of child abuse Australia has many forms legislation in protecting the rights of child in its current state. It is ineffective in terms whereby parents in Australia have the right to implement discipline in their own terms, on the grounds they are not not overseeing boundaries in physical punishment constituting child abuse, therefore resulting in psychological trauma. Using physical pain or even just a threat of physical pain to teach/educate/better a persons decision may be considered to many wrong. The Conventions on the Rights Of the Child (CROC) is the most internationally recognised...

Words: 1104 - Pages: 5

Free Essay

Parental Discipline

...Parental Discipline Everyone who has ever shopped in a store has heard the wail of a young child as he tries to acquire a new toy or a candy bar. For most, the first idea that runs through an individual's mind is why would the parent allow the child to carry on and make a public display. The parent should discipline the child. The child needs to learn that certain behaviors are not permissible in a public setting. A parent should discipline his or her child. Discipline is an action that most parents do not want to engage in. Discipline is described as the practice of teaching or enforcing an acceptable pattern of behavior. With that being said discipline does not need to be physical. Only the threat of physical discipline is enough to discourage this individual from unwanted behavior. Growing up this individual never received any physical discipline but the threat was there and enough of a discouragement. Parents that are found disciplining his or her child in a public setting are often considered abusing his child. The parent is neglecting the child if the parent allows the child to continue with the unwanted behavior. Discipline should be delivered be the parent. The parent knows his or her own child better than a stranger. There are exceptions to every rule. That being said not every parent should discipline his or her child like another parent in a different household might. There is a fine line between discipline and abuse. A slap to the butt should not be considered abuse but...

Words: 639 - Pages: 3

Premium Essay

On Spanking And Child Abuse: Article Analysis

...Spanking and beating a child, as a form of discipline, is a major topic and issue amongst families in the world today. Generations ago, spanking was considered the form of punishment, a child should receive, for bad behavior. In today’s world, people feel that spanking has become out of hand and has been seen as a practice of child abuse creating controversy around corporal punishment. In ‘On Spanking and Abuse’, Charles M. Blow talks about corporal punishment in relation to Adrian Peterson and the extent to which he spanked his son. Michael Eric Dyson analyzes Adrian Peterson’s actions as abuse or punishment in the article ‘Punishment or Child Abuse’ and Melinda Wenner Moyer looks at spanking in general in the article ‘When is it OK to Spank?’...

Words: 1018 - Pages: 5

Premium Essay

Child Discipline

...Anton Shusterman June 4th, 2011 Child Discipline The most important thing in a child’s life is how his parents treat him. His future and the potential for growth and success are determined by the type of childhood that a person experiences. Sometimes parents don’t understand how important it is to treat their children well. Parents don’t think about the words that they say to their children or the actions that they take around them. Some parents think their children are too small and they will not remember the words and actions going on around them, but discipline is not only showing children how to live life and what not to do in any given situation. Discipline is also showing children what they are supposed to do and how they are supposed to conduct themselves in a given day or situation. The best forms of discipline are the ones that help our children realize their potential while making it seem like they are accomplishing success on their own. Children are thought as being difficult and hard to control and we have made movies and shows about such unruly children where their parents do not discipline them correctly and they turn out to be criminals or deadbeats when they become adults. In movies, where there are children that are treated very well i.e. educated, given love and affection, and told to treat others with respect they are thought of as boring, stuck-up, or arrogant. Movies such as Cheaper by Dozen 1 and 2 show how rich children who are successful are inherently...

Words: 3242 - Pages: 13

Premium Essay

Spanking Versus Child Abuse Debate Paper

...versus child abuse The most common misconception that spanking is a form of child abuse has now affected the proper discipline of today’s children and young adults. Some parents are actually afraid to discipline their children in the same way they were brought up due to fears of child abuse claims. Are you one of those parents? It is surprising how many of us are. Is there a right or wrong way to discipline children, and who has the say in it? Most experts on child rearing are against spanking in belief that it causes negative long-term effects, but parents who were spanked as a child tend to believe it is the only way to discipline their children when severe behavior problems arise. So do we act on an old-fashioned learned method or concede to following the expert’s advice and find other alternate measures for discipline in hopes that children will behave? Most adults can say they were spanked as a child and they turned out just fine, so what would be wrong with using that same form of discipline on their children? Children need to know the difference between right and wrong. Parents who do spank their children argue that if done properly and only when absolutely necessary, spanking can be an effective disciplinary tool. However, parents who choose not to spank their children, say that hitting a child only teaches them that violence is a way to solve problems that arise. At what age is it appropriate to start disciplining or spanking children? Teaching children discipline should...

Words: 2023 - Pages: 9

Free Essay

Is Corporal Punishment Needed to Discipline Children

...Is Corporal Punishment Needed to Discipline Children? PSY 101 Introduction to Psychology February 24, 2014 Child discipline is very important, without it, society would have many problems. The questions arise when we discuss what kind of child discipline is most effective. Times have changed and how our parents and grandparents were disciplined when doing unwanted behaviors would today be a severe child abuse. Even for middle age parents of today there is a contrast in the way corporal punishment is used on the youth of today. It is quit the controversy about whether corporal punishment should be used as an acceptable form of child discipline and if it acceptable at what point is the line crossed from physical discipline to child abuse. So many countries have banned corporal punishment in all three aspects of corporal punishment. The three disciplines of corporal punishment is home, school, and judicial. In this paper we will be focusing on the home. Home is where discipline is the most effective and happens most frequently. Besides home there is school where here in the United States most schools are not allowed to use corporal punishment. Twenty-eight states ban corporal punishment of public schoolchildren, an increase of 26 states over the past 30 years; but inside the family, legalized corporal punishment of children remains entrenched and unbudging” (Susan, 2006).It is used in the judicial system but only under extreme circumstances and under strict guidelines...

Words: 3518 - Pages: 15

Premium Essay

Spanking: Ethical Or Unethical

...say spanking is an effective method of discipline. Others consider spanking a form of child abuse. The difference between hitting and spanking forms a thin line for some, for others, there’s a big difference. Hitting is an aggressive behavior intended to inflict harm and pain onto another person. While spanking is a disciplinary action intended to teach or correct one behavior. Spanking is used to teach appropriate behavior but is often interpreted by the child, that to avoid pain and hurt they should not do what is undesired by their parents, at least not in their view. It is a parent’s job to teach their children about rules, morals and values....

Words: 1306 - Pages: 6

Premium Essay

Is Corporal Punishment Needed to Discipline Children

...Is Corporal Punishment Needed to Discipline Children One of the most beloved fantasy movies of all times that holds a special place within many people’s hearts is the famous “Wizard of Oz”. This movie is a musical that was created and directed by Victor Fleming in 1939 with the help of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, Malcolm Brown, William A. Horning and Jack Martin Smith as the production designers (that were never credited) and Cedric Gibbons as the art director. (IMDb, n.d) This movie is about a young, girl from Kansas named Dorothy Gale played by Judy Garland who dreams of another life. Dorothy lives on her auntie Emily (Clara Blandick) and uncle Henry’s (Charley Grapewin) farm, and has friends named “Hunk (Ray Bolger), Zeke (Bert Lahr) and Hickory (Jack Haley). All of the mentioned friends play a vital roles as The Scarecrow (Ray Bolger), Corporal punishment in today’s world is the deliberate infliction of pain for disciplining a behavior deemed unacceptable. This form on discipline is considered to be used to correct behavior but does it instill aggressive behavior that will lead to domestic violence or even child abuse. This form of punishment is considered to be the most commonly used form of discipline in America today and is currently legal. This type of discipline is not favorable in today’s society and statistics indicate it will lead to future aggression later in life? The official definition of corporal punishment is a form of physical punishment that involves the deliberate...

Words: 2856 - Pages: 12

Premium Essay

Corporal Punishment

...have to discipline our children, as heartbreaking as it can be at times we have to do it in order to show them right from wrong. This being said, all parents raise their children different and have a different definition of what the appropriate punishment is for their child. Over the past couple of years, a huge controversy had been made over parents using corporal punishment such as spanking to discipline their child. Corporal punishment is the use of physical force causing pain, but not wounds, as a means of discipline.” Spanking, rapping on the head and slapping are forms of corporal punishment which we do not classify as abuse. There are two factors to be taken into consideration when distinguishing between corporal punishment and physical abuse: intensity: the extent to which injuries have resulted from the use of violence, intention: the extent to which the intention is to teach/discipline. Corporal punishment is just one of the wrong ways to discipline a child. The aim is not to substitute corporal punishment with psychological abuse but to discipline without using violence (UNICEF, 2010). Corporal punishment is a tremendous controversial issue among Americans all across the country. Many studies have been researched to prove the behavior of children that have been disciplined with corporal punishment and how it affects the well-being of the child at the present time as well as in the future. Parents are not the only individuals that have been allowed to discipline their...

Words: 3884 - Pages: 16

Premium Essay

Child Abuse

...When Is Discipline, Child Abuse? Many people have noticed that parents are starting to get more frustrated with with their lives and are taking it out on their children. Parents start to under think their actions and instead of disciplining their children, they are abusing their children. There are many precautions that should be taken when dealing with situations like these. Many experiments can be done in order to determine if abuse is taking place in the home. In order to determine child abuse, authorities usually look for bruises or broken bones in bad families but child abuse is determined by factors that are sometimes unknown. Child abuse is defined by internet dictionaries as physical, emotional, or sexual mistreatment of children. OkKids released documents on the case of Naomi Whitecrow and her child abuse story taken to the extreme (OkKids). Naomi Whitecrow was taken from her biological mother in February of 2008 and was sent to a foster home in September of 2008. Naomi died January 20th of 2009 from severe child abuse while in foster care. While people may think that children get bruises all the time, Naomi had bruises on her chest, face, back, legs, buttock, and head from Amy Holder, her foster mother. Although it was believed to be Amy Holder who was the cause of Naomi’s death, the defense argued that Holder brought Naomi to the doctor five days prior because she was a “concerned mother”. This case also shows that Holder brought in a “texas expert” to notify...

Words: 1263 - Pages: 6

Free Essay

Diciplining Your Child

...might consider that abuse. But few of us really know what the law actually says about spanking or just disciplining your child in general. The main purpose of this report is to address an area of confusion is that most of us as parents, and even the public, are not educated on the laws when it comes to disciplining your children. I am here to argue that as a parent, once educated on the law, you can discipline your child as you should; and not fear being charged with child abuse. You will also be able to shut your kid’s traps if they threatened to call the authorities on you. Most of the kids that attempt this only get this from other kids that only know part of the law and again their parents aren’t educated on it, they are just plain scared. There is a child discipline law in every state. The laws in every state pretty much say the same thing. As a matter of fact some of them are almost worded the same. In this instance I will tell you what the Texas state law says. This was taken from the website, “kidjacked.com/legal/spanking law.asp#texas” “Abuse does not include reasonable discipline by a parent/guardian/managing or possessory conservator if child not exposed to substantial risk of harm. Family Code § 261.001. [Civil Code] Parent/stepparent/person standing in loco parentis to child is justified to use non-deadly force against a child under 18 when and to degree the actor reasonably believes necessary to discipline, or safeguard or...

Words: 698 - Pages: 3