The First Half in New York, the Second Half in Paris

Written by Wenhua Wang
Translated by Hans Duan

New York and Paris, as most of clichés, one for realism, the other for impressionism. In the first half of our life, like a football match, we try our best to run, but the second half, we might stop and think. The first half is realism and the second is impressionism. I had this feeling because I experienced different cities in my different periods… The world will keep running without me but what I could have without myself? New York and Paris represent the two sides of my life. New York is the daytime and Paris is the night. New York is the first half and Paris is the second.

Before I was 35, I was sure that the greatest city in this world is New York. I finished my master in California and could not wait to go to New York to work. It has been 5 years that I thought I was in heaven. I loved New York like many other people: it is the centre of culture since 20th century, convenient and abundant. I could cross the time and space with taxis and metros. One can see the newest, oldest, best and worst things in New York.

Therefore, when I was in New York, I took every second to feel it. In the daytime, I worked for a bank, 10 hours per day. In the nighttime, I went to NYU to learn about movies, nearly 4 hours each time. The life seemed to be quite meaningful in my 20s. To live means to squeeze you. I turned over the city where I lived.

This kind of idea was not just for New York. I had this American life ever since I was young in Shanghai. The life of New Yorkers was full of Protestants’ wills to fight and capitalists’ wills to win. I believed that one can overcome all difficulties and defeated all the competitions by keep trying. We live for being bigger, richer and more famous. The power and the wealth are the two Gods of New York. And the magical shoes, which can help you to step into the heaven, are your career, career and career.

In this life of being in the jungle, in order to keep ahead, everyone was catching up the time and fight for resources. Entering the elevators, we knew that we had pressed our floors but we still pressed them again and again, seeming that it could be faster. Walking out of the offices, we still talked on mobile phones, seeming that we could control every step. We had to do everything to reach our goals in New York, even by destroying others. There were no bad men here, only the losers. Nevertheless, I changed these thoughts gradually after 35.

The first thing that shocked me was my father’s death. My father was a nice man. In his whole life, he obeyed the regulations, he was nice, he has no bad habits and his health was as firm as a castle. At age of 72, he had cancer, experiencing all the tortures and the humanization. He worked hard in his life and save a lot ; he believed that the current tortures can win a better tomorrow. We also believed “ No pain no gains ” and took care of him just like we worked in New York. However the cancer was as heavy as a mountain and it took him eventually after 2 years. My system of values broke down totally when he was gone. I never expected that the « New York Spirit », which I was so proud of, is so fragile.

It was not only for my father’s case but also in my career. As I was promoted higher and higher, I found so-called “ capitalism ” did not work as I thought so magically. Anyone who was an employee knew that very few companies were in the true “ open market ” and “ competed fairly ”. The one who was successful was usually sometimes quite tiny. Many people devoted their whole life for a company but won only a pen as a « special memory » and those ones who took huge amount of money away from company usually became the legends.

I felt it slowly that there can be a higher and more complicated « justice » than the theory of “ what goes around, comes around ”. There is some kind of fun more endurable and vague than “ success and fame ”. It cannot be explained by American capitalism that believes “ go, go, go ”. So where can I find that fun and equity? I thought of Tibet, Bhutan, Africa and New Zealand. Finally I noticed France.

In fact, Americans always ridiculed France when I was in New York. They could not stop laughing at France because America is such a powerful country in economy, science and military. France was like noble man but only in history and the people we can worship died long time ago. Frenchmen are arrogant and the high tax rate makes everyone quite lazy. People strike too often even including the owners of the hotels.

After I moved to Taiwan, Provence and Tuscany became more and more popular. I read a book called Under the Tuscan Sun by Frances Mayes and one sentence touched me: « In California, time was like a hula-hoop that I twisted so much but still stayed at the same place. In Tuscany, I can walk freely for a whole day with a basket of plums under the Mediterranean sun. »

Yes! What are we rushing for? We try our best to pursue fortune, at cost of our youth and exertion but are we really richer and more famous than the others? More importantly, are we really happy? There is a wide horizon at distance but why we are playing our hula-hoops at the same place?

When I re-studied France, I discovered that France and America represent two different ways of life. Americans believe that people can conquer the fate so that we can do things against the stream; French people prefer stay in peace, so everything goes with the stream. New york has many buildings over one hundred floors but Paris has houses over 300 years old. New York is innovative but Paris is nostalgic. Parisians chat in the cafés; New Yorkers work in the cafés. New York has crowds; Paris has tastes. New York has the money; Paris has the cakes.

Either the people or the government, the French focus on food, clothes, accommodation and the things “close to life ” – let America be the superpower, they say, do whatever it wants to do – conquering the space, attacking Iraq, increasing the rates and creating new technologies. French people like to be peaceful on the other side of Atlantic, smoking, drinking, watching footballs and doing their fashions. When Americans were too busy and suffered from ulcer, French people ate another jar of Foie Gras.

Speaking of food, there are more than 300 types of cheese in France and just in Bordeaux there are 57 wine regions. Sitting in front of a café, you can chat for 3 hours with a glass of red wine. You start to have dinner at 9 pm to the next day. The time they spend on food is jus tour time on work. However, ironically they don’t have “ all you can eat ”.

Eating is very important but you have to choose the right time. A friend recommended me to try a French restaurant and reminded me that every Tuesday and Thursday it is closed. “Why?” I asked. He said: “Because the chef will go and watch the football.” The smart chef knows the law. French law sets the maximum working hours per week is 35 hours and most of people has 5-week paid vacation each year. But Americans regard the over working hours as a self-added value so that they reply emails with mobile phones in vacation. French people know how to have fun. In the music festival in Paris each June, from mid-day till midnight, hundreds of open concerts are held that the metros have to stop charging because there are too many people. In the “ Nuit Blanche” every Octobre, the restaurants and boutiques that close at night will open until 7 am the next morning. Every summer, the Paris government will place a 1.8 km-long manmade beach along the Seine River – sands, benches, and palm trees- to enable the poor people to enjoy “the beach”.

Of course, the French culture doesn’t just come from eating or drinking. Americans study for certificates but French people study for making the sentiments. People read poems in the train stations for reading festival. Bookstores with music run till morning.

We follow America but do we want this kind of French life?

I want. I came to Paris in one November and a French friend hosted me. When I was to leave, I asked:“What will you do tomorrow?” “Go to the bank.” “ And then?” I asked. “I don’t understand what you mean…”

“Go to the bank” is a thing for me to do after lunch in hurry but it is all a French man can do for one day. They do little things one by one, day per day.

Such a life is too decadent for Americans and Chinese. It is indeed. The unemployment rate in France is close to 10%. High tax rate makes the employers prefer pausing, just in order to pay tax for employees. The downtowns Paris is about luxury life but minorities in suburbs have no chance to work. These are all shadows. But perhaps the shadows can offer the space to breathe in the places under the sun burning like ours. The end of life is the same for everyone. Richer people might have more people to moan. The endless pursuit is just head to the end in advance and why don’t we take time to warm up our life? You don’t have to devote your life to success. You can yawn a bit in your life.

I came back to Taipei from Paris. There is no change. The mobile phone rang after two-week off. The people called me ten times if they could not get me once. My friends asked me: “ Well, now you quitted your job and you went to Europe so what’s next?” – Such a New York style.

I wanted to say: “ Live well. Isn’t it the biggest project in our life?” But I know in this crowded Taipei, a man under 40 years old like me is too hypocritical to say that. I could have money and time to enjoy this French life because I profited from my American life before. I still love my job, love New York, but I don’t have to push too much like 20 years ago.

So I say: “ I will still get up early and work hard. But at night, I want to turn off me mobile.”

The world will keep running without me but what I could have without myself?