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Parents with Immature Behaviors

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Immature Parents: Role Reversal

Many of today's teens are forced to act like adults—because their parents won't.

by Ginger Rue
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Mama Drama In December 2009 a California superior court awarded custody of then-seventeen-year-old Frances Bean Cobain (left) to her paternal grandmother and aunt and issued a restraining order against Frances's mother, Courtney Love (right). Photo: Adam Nemser/photolink.net/Newscom
After a tough first year at an Ivy League university, 20-year-old Sarah was looking forward to relaxing over the summer. Unfortunately, her parents made that impossible.
"My dad's an alcoholic, and my mom's addicted to dating alcoholics," the Stanford, California, native says. "They're divorced, and my dad is broke, so I had to help him get government assistance. Meanwhile, I needed to deal with my mom's drama about the terrible guys she chooses." Between running her mom's dating life and managing her dad's finances, Sarah was exhausted by summer's end—and relieved to return to college thousands of miles away. "I can't do much from here, so I can't feel guilty," she says.
These days countless teens like Sarah, who are coping with irresponsible parents, are forced to step in as the mature party. "When parents refuse to act like adults, it creates a power vacuum. Someone has to fill that space, and most often it's the teen son or daughter," explains Karol Ward, a licensed psychotherapist and author of Worried Sick (Berkley).
While Sarah had to take care of her mom and dad, nineteen-year-old Nicole,* in Buffalo, found herself playing guardian to her younger sister when their mother was MIA. "When I was sixteen, my fourteen-year-old sister Jen* and I wouldn't see my mom for three or four days at a time," she says. "I had to

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