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Listening Skill in Communication

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“Học lắng nghe “ có vẻ là một câu chuyện thật buồn cười với nhiều người . Nhưng thực tế :có mắt không đồng nghĩa với nhìn thấy, có não không đồng nghĩa với biết nghĩ, có tài không đồng nghĩa vớiviệc biết lắn nghe. Ngạn ngữ Nga cũng có câu “Con người mất 3 tuổi để học nói nhưng phải mất cả cuộc đời để học lắng nghe”.

Lắng nghe không phải là bản năng mà là nghệ thuật, kĩ năng cần phải rèn luyện lâu dài. Lắng nghe chính là hùng biện nhất song lại ít người biết được điều đó . Trong giao tiếp với nhau chúng ta thường tranh nhau thể hiện mà thật ít người tranh nhau để lắng nghe. Để có một kĩ năng lắng nghe tốt bạn cần tuân thủ các bước sau đây của chu trình lắng nghe :

Tập trung: Yếu tố đầu tiên để lắng nghe hiệu quả đối tác giao tiếp là tập trung. Tập trung có nghĩa là trong một thời điểm chỉ làm một việc. Nhiều người giao tiếp không thành công vì trong khi lắng nghe người khác truyền tải thông điệp thì để các công việc khác xen vào. Kết quả là thông điệp được truyền tải từ người nói đến người nghe không có chung một cách hiểu như nhau. Tập trung lắng nghe cũng là biểu hiện tôn trọng người nói, giúp người nói có thêm sự tin tưởng để giao tiếp một cách cởi mở hơ.

Tham dự: Người nói phải có người nghe, người gửi phải có người nhận.Tham dự trong lắng nghe được biểu hiện bằng sự chú ý của đôi mắt, những cái gật đầu của người nghe. Về ngôn từ là những từ đệm nh: dạ, vâng ạ, thế ạ, thật không?...

Hiểu: Nhiều cuộc giao tiếp diễn ra trong bối cảnh ông nói gà, bà nói vịt vì không hiểu được thông điệp của giao tiếp.Để hiểu được thông điệp của người gửi, yêu cầu của người nghe phaỉ xác định lại thông điệp bằng cách trình bày lại nội dung của người nói theo cách hiểu của mình hoặc bằng cách đặt câu hỏi để xác nhận như: tôi hiểu như thế này có đúng không ? Hoặc ý anh là thế này…?

Ghi nhớ: Cái gì cũng chép cũng ghi, không biết thì hỏi tự ti làm gì là nguyên tắc cơ bản của giao tiếp. Để ghi nhớ thông điệp của quá trình giao tiếp bạn không thể nhớ hết tất cả những gì mà người nói truyền tải. Bạn phải biết chọn lọc những thông điệp chính mà người nói muốn truyền tải. Cách tốt nhất để bạn không quên đi những thông tin cơ bản của một cuộc giao tiếp là trước mỗi cuộc giao tiếp bạn nên chuẩn bị cho mình một cuốn sổ và một cây bút. Đó là những công cụ quan trọng nhất giúp bạn ghi nhớ những thông tin quan trọng của một cuộc giao tiếp.

Hồi đáp: Giao tiếp là một quá trình tương tác hai chiều giữa người gửi và người nhận . Sau khi nhận thông điệp, người nhận giải mã thông điệp bước tiếp theo cần có su65 hồi đáp với người gửi. Có đi có lại mới toại lòng nhau, mới có thể hoàn chỉnh quá trình giao tiếp cuãng như lắng nghe. Sơ đồ sau đây mô tả quá trình hồi đáp thông điệp trong giao tiếp:

Phát triển: Giao tiếp không phải là một thời điểm mà là một quá trình. Quá trình hối đáp là sự chấm dứt cho một chu trình giao tiếp và tìm hiểu thông điệp. Phát triển sẽ giúp cho quá trình giao tiếp được bước sang một chu trình mới. Chu trình lắng nghe được mô tả như trên là một mô hình khép kín và diễn ra liên tục theo chiều xoáy chôn ốc đi lên.

Và cuối cùng tôi muốn gửi đến các bạn thông điệp. Người biết lắng nghe nhất là người hạnh phúc nhất. Dù bạn làm nghề gì đi nữa nhất là những công việc liên quan đến con người thì lắng nghe là kĩ năng quan trọng đầu tiên bạn cần học.

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